We pray, we march yet nothing occurs
The line between love and hate remains a blurred
Line...
I...
Want to love them but their hate for me doesnt make the pain hurt less
When they put their bullets in my back, their knees in my back
Dead blacks in the street makes me want to attack
In defense of self
My pride for self
My love for self
Relishes not in useless killing or demeaning
I find myself grieving for every mother and father putting their child in a grave
In a day and age when social media shows the outrage live
The outcry just seems to embolden police officers lies
The 24 hour news, reminds us what we mean to Lady Liberty
And as her children sing the blues
Historical levels of un-education continue
Existential unemployment
Prison rates that makes for better business
The world witnesses police brutality and black fatalities in real time and does nothing about it
If you never walked a mile in my shoes then you know nothing about it
If you lived a day in my life you would never feel blessed
You would feel less vested in teaching your children that in the U.S. all men are created equal

Thoughts
Mindless texts
Posts ending with emojis and hashtags
Billions of words randomly tweeted out
Ideas and conceptions
Time and space attaching themselves to certain perceptions
Relevancy belongs to truth being spoken through reality and fantasy

Today all the eligible promotees find out if they get promoted
I've been working for this company for over 17 years and YES I feel like I'm owed
Those that got promoted got to hear from the CEO while the rest of us got a canned speech from the CEO's flunky:

He said: I’m sorry you didn’t make it...you’ll get’em next year”
I thought: "Whatever it's the same old routine year after year"
He said: "You’re all great workers, but for now we need you right here"

To this company I've given so much back
This time every year I can't sleep
I get anxiety attacks thinking about being left back...again
And it hurts
I sacrifice everything for my work
When I look back I think its been a nice run
But after all these years of not reaching the next rung
I’m beginning to think that perhaps my time in this job is done

My goal is to be the best version of myself that I can be
By exposing myself to people from varied walks of life
I'm provided with a greater vantage point to see
It’s humbling when I look in the mirror because I have to admit I’m not where I want to be
But if I recognize my own faults exposing the lie
I can challenge my own paradigm and make alive
Possibility
I thank God for giving me a greater sense of personal accountability
And the desire to no matter what
Always take care of my responsibilities