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through the dresser draws
one had to ferret
in order to locate
the egg lifter
Poetry by MAN Jul 2013
SNAKE
cold blooded adapter smooth in its capture, venomous to those caught in its rapture
CATERPILLAR
ultimate evolver unique in every state, to cocoon and assimilate into a new creature at such a fast rate
OX
lifter of the heavy, for the weak there are plenty, paver of new roads that bring prosperity to many
RABBIT
soft to the touch we all wanna pet usually are to fast for anyone to get
PIG
plentiful is the swine for weak is their mind created for slaughter what a sad lifetime
IGUANA
all I can think is Mexican radio a snake with legs smoking **** in 80's videos
OSTRICH
a bird who cannot fly makes me wonder why such a big bird won't even try

~

DOMESTICATED
over time becoming content living in a situation not originally meant
OBEDIENT
submits to authority biding time as a follower till own goals become priority
GROWL*
slow rumble from the soul an intimidating stare with a glow, with a Grrr! everyone will know
M.A.N 7-14-13 trying something different with mind associations. The Dog is my Eastern Zodiac sign I was very intrigued when I read qualities  I will also be doing Scorpio next. I just added Scorpio and changed title these are my two astro signs I'm still going to do a stand alone Scorpio with a dark twist stay tuned. Funny side note I'm writing these associations and can do them all day while I'm in LA with family waiting to be seated at a Chinese restaurant Din Tai Fung in Arcadia CA ;)
Leaetta May Jun 2015
Her hand rested slight
Upon the book she'd found
Her bag across her shoulder
She was waiting for the sound
Of the door alarm at the B & N

I mean after all it was
Fifty nine volumes
On how to build a bomb
Found none to soon  
On a shelf at the B & N

Abandoned by her lover
After too many fights
That was five years ago
A lot of lonely nights
Casing the B & N

Screaming out loud
At rush hour on the train
Was not an option
Nor was *******
Snorted at the B & N


Finally people milling round
She quietly lifted the solution
To her ravaged heart
All fifty nine on revolution
S
    l
        i
           p
              p
                 e
                    d
Into her bag at the B & N



Head down and weighted down
She walked to the exit
Waiting for someone
No one to prevent it
Except security at the B & N

At last the perfect patsy
Alarm rang, the man froze
And our spurned lover
To the opportunity arose
Ran out of the B & N

Ran to the parking lot
Her VW bug
Opened the door
Threw in what she'd lugged
59 looted at the B & N

Key from the drink holder
In her shaking hand
er  rhrh  rhrh vah-room
Such a brazen plan
Perpetrated at the B & N

Her eyes glowed wicked
With rage and revenge
Someone would pay
All would attend
This crime hatched at the B & N

The deed was done
She clung to the wheel
The accelerator floored           
The tires squealed
Away, away from the B & N
TinaMarie May 2012
Straight Shooter
with No Chaser
Tell me
No Lies
Kind of
Communicator.

Pom Pom swinging
Rah Rah singing
From the front
Back
Or Side
Proudly Cheering.

Spirit Lifter
Mood Shifter
From low
To high
With
On time Laughter.

If things get crazy
Or someone comes against me
You got
My back
Quick
You're my one man army.

My Partner

My Friend



©Tina Thompson
I.

  When to the common rest that crowns our days,
  Called in the noon of life, the good man goes,
  Or full of years, and ripe in wisdom, lays
  His silver temples in their last repose;
  When, o'er the buds of youth, the death-wind blows,
  And blights the fairest; when our bitter tears
  Stream, as the eyes of those that love us close,
  We think on what they were, with many fears
Lest goodness die with them, and leave the coming years:

II.

  And therefore, to our hearts, the days gone by,--
  When lived the honoured sage whose death we wept,
  And the soft virtues beamed from many an eye,
  And beat in many a heart that long has slept,--
  Like spots of earth where angel-feet have stepped--
  Are holy; and high-dreaming bards have told
  Of times when worth was crowned, and faith was kept,
  Ere friendship grew a snare, or love waxed cold--
Those pure and happy times--the golden days of old.

III.

  Peace to the just man's memory,--let it grow
  Greener with years, and blossom through the flight
  Of ages; let the mimic canvas show
  His calm benevolent features; let the light
  Stream on his deeds of love, that shunned the sight
  Of all but heaven, and in the book of fame,
  The glorious record of his virtues write,
  And hold it up to men, and bid them claim
A palm like his, and catch from him the hallowed flame.

IV.

  But oh, despair not of their fate who rise
  To dwell upon the earth when we withdraw!
  Lo! the same shaft by which the righteous dies,
  Strikes through the wretch that scoffed at mercy's law,
  And trode his brethren down, and felt no awe
  Of Him who will avenge them. Stainless worth,
  Such as the sternest age of virtue saw,
  Ripens, meanwhile, till time shall call it forth
From the low modest shade, to light and bless the earth.

V.

  Has Nature, in her calm, majestic march
  Faltered with age at last? does the bright sun
  Grow dim in heaven? or, in their far blue arch,
  Sparkle the crowd of stars, when day is done,
  Less brightly? when the dew-lipped Spring comes on,
  Breathes she with airs less soft, or scents the sky
  With flowers less fair than when her reign begun?
  Does prodigal Autumn, to our age, deny
The plenty that once swelled beneath his sober eye?

VI.

  Look on this beautiful world, and read the truth
  In her fair page; see, every season brings
  New change, to her, of everlasting youth;
  Still the green soil, with joyous living things,
  Swarms, the wide air is full of joyous wings,
  And myriads, still, are happy in the sleep
  Of ocean's azure gulfs, and where he flings
  The restless surge. Eternal Love doth keep
In his complacent arms, the earth, the air, the deep.

VII.

  Will then the merciful One, who stamped our race
  With his own image, and who gave them sway
  O'er earth, and the glad dwellers on her face,
  Now that our swarming nations far away
  Are spread, where'er the moist earth drinks the day,
  Forget the ancient care that taught and nursed
  His latest offspring? will he quench the ray
  Infused by his own forming smile at first,
And leave a work so fair all blighted and accursed?

VIII.

  Oh, no! a thousand cheerful omens give
  Hope of yet happier days, whose dawn is nigh.
  He who has tamed the elements, shall not live
  The slave of his own passions; he whose eye
  Unwinds the eternal dances of the sky,
  And in the abyss of brightness dares to span
  The sun's broad circle, rising yet more high,
  In God's magnificent works his will shall scan--
And love and peace shall make their paradise with man.

IX.

  Sit at the feet of history--through the night
  Of years the steps of virtue she shall trace,
  And show the earlier ages, where her sight
  Can pierce the eternal shadows o'er their face;--
  When, from the genial cradle of our race,
  Went forth the tribes of men, their pleasant lot
  To choose, where palm-groves cooled their dwelling-place,
  Or freshening rivers ran; and there forgot
The truth of heaven, and kneeled to gods that heard them not.

X.

  Then waited not the murderer for the night,
  But smote his brother down in the bright day,
  And he who felt the wrong, and had the might,
  His own avenger, girt himself to slay;
  Beside the path the unburied carcass lay;
  The shepherd, by the fountains of the glen,
  Fled, while the robber swept his flock away,
  And slew his babes. The sick, untended then,
Languished in the damp shade, and died afar from men.

XI.

  But misery brought in love--in passion's strife
  Man gave his heart to mercy, pleading long,
  And sought out gentle deeds to gladden life;
  The weak, against the sons of spoil and wrong,
  Banded, and watched their hamlets, and grew strong.
  States rose, and, in the shadow of their might,
  The timid rested. To the reverent throng,
  Grave and time-wrinkled men, with locks all white,
Gave laws, and judged their strifes, and taught the way of right;

XII.

  Till bolder spirits seized the rule, and nailed
  On men the yoke that man should never bear,
  And drove them forth to battle. Lo! unveiled
  The scene of those stern ages! What is there!
  A boundless sea of blood, and the wild air
  Moans with the crimson surges that entomb
  Cities and bannered armies; forms that wear
  The kingly circlet rise, amid the gloom,
O'er the dark wave, and straight are swallowed in its womb.

XIII.

  Those ages have no memory--but they left
  A record in the desert--columns strown
  On the waste sands, and statues fallen and cleft,
  Heaped like a host in battle overthrown;
  Vast ruins, where the mountain's ribs of stone
  Were hewn into a city; streets that spread
  In the dark earth, where never breath has blown
  Of heaven's sweet air, nor foot of man dares tread
The long and perilous ways--the Cities of the Dead:

XIV.

  And tombs of monarchs to the clouds up-piled--
  They perished--but the eternal tombs remain--
  And the black precipice, abrupt and wild,
  Pierced by long toil and hollowed to a fane;--
  Huge piers and frowning forms of gods sustain
  The everlasting arches, dark and wide,
  Like the night-heaven, when clouds are black with rain.
  But idly skill was tasked, and strength was plied,
All was the work of slaves to swell a despot's pride.

XV.

  And Virtue cannot dwell with slaves, nor reign
  O'er those who cower to take a tyrant's yoke;
  She left the down-trod nations in disdain,
  And flew to Greece, when Liberty awoke,
  New-born, amid those glorious vales, and broke
  Sceptre and chain with her fair youthful hands:
  As rocks are shivered in the thunder-stroke.
  And lo! in full-grown strength, an empire stands
Of leagued and rival states, the wonder of the lands.

XVI.

  Oh, Greece! thy flourishing cities were a spoil
  Unto each other; thy hard hand oppressed
  And crushed the helpless; thou didst make thy soil
  Drunk with the blood of those that loved thee best;
  And thou didst drive, from thy unnatural breast,
  Thy just and brave to die in distant climes;
  Earth shuddered at thy deeds, and sighed for rest
  From thine abominations; after times,
That yet shall read thy tale, will tremble at thy crimes.

XVII.

  Yet there was that within thee which has saved
  Thy glory, and redeemed thy blotted name;
  The story of thy better deeds, engraved
  On fame's unmouldering pillar, puts to shame
  Our chiller virtue; the high art to tame
  The whirlwind of the passions was thine own;
  And the pure ray, that from thy ***** came,
  Far over many a land and age has shone,
And mingles with the light that beams from God's own throne;

XVIII.

  And Rome--thy sterner, younger sister, she
  Who awed the world with her imperial frown--
  Rome drew the spirit of her race from thee,--
  The rival of thy shame and thy renown.
  Yet her degenerate children sold the crown
  Of earth's wide kingdoms to a line of slaves;
  Guilt reigned, and we with guilt, and plagues came down,
  Till the north broke its floodgates, and the waves
Whelmed the degraded race, and weltered o'er their graves.

XIX.

  Vainly that ray of brightness from above,
  That shone around the Galilean lake,
  The light of hope, the leading star of love,
  Struggled, the darkness of that day to break;
  Even its own faithless guardians strove to slake,
  In fogs of earth, the pure immortal flame;
  And priestly hands, for Jesus' blessed sake,
  Were red with blood, and charity became,
In that stern war of forms, a mockery and a name.

**.

  They triumphed, and less ****** rites were kept
  Within the quiet of the convent cell:
  The well-fed inmates pattered prayer, and slept,
  And sinned, and liked their easy penance well.
  Where pleasant was the spot for men to dwell,
  Amid its fair broad lands the abbey lay,
  Sheltering dark ****** that were shame to tell,
  And cowled and barefoot beggars swarmed the way,
All in their convent weeds, of black, and white, and gray.

XXI.

  Oh, sweetly the returning muses' strain
  Swelled over that famed stream, whose gentle tide
  In their bright lap the Etrurian vales detain,
  Sweet, as when winter storms have ceased to chide,
  And all the new-leaved woods, resounding wide,
  Send out wild hymns upon the scented air.
  Lo! to the smiling Arno's classic side
  The emulous nations of the west repair,
And kindle their quenched urns, and drink fresh spirit there.

XXII.

  Still, Heaven deferred the hour ordained to rend
  From saintly rottenness the sacred stole;
  And cowl and worshipped shrine could still defend
  The wretch with felon stains upon his soul;
  And crimes were set to sale, and hard his dole
  Who could not bribe a passage to the skies;
  And vice, beneath the mitre's kind control,
  Sinned gaily on, and grew to giant size,
Shielded by priestly power, and watched by priestly eyes.

XXIII.

  At last the earthquake came--the shock, that hurled
  To dust, in many fragments dashed and strown,
  The throne, whose roots were in another world,
  And whose far-stretching shadow awed our own.
  From many a proud monastic pile, o'erthrown,
  Fear-struck, the hooded inmates rushed and fled;
  The web, that for a thousand years had grown
  O'er prostrate Europe, in that day of dread
Crumbled and fell, as fire dissolves the flaxen thread.

XXIV.

  The spirit of that day is still awake,
  And spreads himself, and shall not sleep again;
  But through the idle mesh of power shall break
  Like billows o'er the Asian monarch's chain;
  Till men are filled with him, and feel how vain,
  Instead of the pure heart and innocent hands,
  Are all the proud and pompous modes to gain
  The smile of heaven;--till a new age expands
Its white and holy wings above the peaceful lands.

XXV.

  For look again on the past years;--behold,
  How like the nightmare's dreams have flown away
  Horrible forms of worship, that, of old,
  Held, o'er the shuddering realms, unquestioned sway:
  See crimes, that feared not once the eye of day,
  Rooted from men, without a name or place:
  See nations blotted out from earth, to pay
  The forfeit of deep guilt;--with glad embrace
The fair disburdened lands welcome a nobler race.

XXVI.

  Thus error's monstrous shapes from earth are driven;
  They fade, they fly--but truth survives their flight;
  Earth has no shades to quench that beam of heaven;
  Each ray that shone, in early time, to light
  The faltering footsteps in the path of right,
  Each gleam of clearer brightness shed to aid
  In man's maturer day his bolder sight,
  All blended, like the rainbow's radiant braid,
Pour yet, and still shall pour, the blaze that cannot fade.

XXVII.

  Late, from this western shore, that morning chased
  The deep and ancient night, that threw its shroud
  O'er the green land of groves, the beautiful waste,
  Nurse of full streams, and lifter-up of proud
  Sky-mingling mountains that o'erlook the cloud.
  Erewhile, where yon gay spires their brightness rear,
  Trees waved, and the brown hunter's shouts were loud
  Amid the forest; and the bounding deer
Fled at the glancing plume, and the gaunt wolf yelled near;

XXVIII.

  And where his willing waves yon bright blue bay
  Sends up, to kiss his decorated brim,
  And cradles, in his soft embrace, the gay
  Young group of grassy islands born of him,
  And crowding nigh, or in the distance dim,
  Lifts the white throng of sails, that bear or bring
  The commerce of the world;--with tawny limb,
  And belt and beads in sunlight glistening,
The savage urged his skiff like wild bird on the wing.

XXIX.

  Then all this youthful paradise around,
  And all the broad and boundless mainland, lay
  Cooled by the interminable wood, that frowned
  O'er mount and vale, where never summer ray
  Glanced, till the strong tornado broke his way
  Through the gray giants of the sylvan wild;
  Yet many a sheltered glade, with blossoms gay,
  Beneath the showery sky and sunshine mild,
Within the shaggy arms of that dark forest smiled.

***.

  There stood the Indian hamlet, there the lake
  Spread its blue sheet that flashed with many an oar,
  Where the brown otter plunged him from the brake,
  And the deer drank: as the light gale flew o'er,
  The twinkling maize-field rustled on the shore;
  And while that spot, so wild, and lone, and fair,
  A look of glad and guiltless beauty wore,
  And peace was on the earth and in the air,
The warrior lit the pile, and bound his captive there:

XXXI.

  Not unavenged--the foeman, from the wood,
  Beheld the deed, and when the midnight shade
  Was stillest, gorged his battle-axe with blood;
  All died--the wailing babe--the shrieking maid--
  And in the flood of fire that scathed the glade,
  The roofs went down; but deep the silence grew,
  When on the dewy woods the day-beam played;
  No more the cabin smokes rose wreathed and blue,
And ever, by their lake, lay moored the light canoe.

XXXII.

  Look now abroad--another race has filled
  These populous borders
JAM May 2015
Hello, allow me to introduce myself.
My name is Jocund, The Gardener.
Living lucid, a fellow mind traveler.

That’s kind of like a chill Childe wanderer
Of the flowing forest floor,
Feathered cotton or greening words
On the wind unravel-er;
Gone’a’wandering in untraveled soils,
A seed settler.

Tragedy left my face sneer metered,
Mouth stretched sideways,
Toothy as a dumb grinning jester.

Yearning to make one stupid gesture,
So you’ll see I’m not too interested in being above or lesser.
Just on a mission,
Learning how to be both student and teacher:

Drawing abyssal blueprints,
Joining the disillusioned,
Describing a dynamic curriculum
And coding oaths like Odin’s to bind Cosmic-Woden’s
--Mr. Omnipotent to us rodents—undying reticulum.


Re-programmed to generate runic music
Nomenclature shaped in the underlying resonating
That is every particle operating in unison.

So I'm riding the chronicled-Euclidean space-time continuum
Of balance known to us as equilibrium,
And can you feel me breathing?

It’s the giving and taking and pushing and pulling of gravity propagating,
Bending light under and rending sight of what will be and what has been.

Oh well,
[Where], (when), {how} I am is what matters most to me.

“Jinkies!”
“What is it Velma?!”
“I think that’s Relativity.”

So, speaking relatively
I’d rather deduce from what’s relevant to me,
Lather rinse and reduce the divine to dust in the winds of time,
And maybe see the truth behind {who}, [what], (why) I’m-

[{assburgian]}: high functioning and genius,
Mumbling, s-st-stutterin', tic tic-ing and tremblin’.
it's ****-chilling and tedious.

But wait! There’s more.

{(Bipolar}): slightly manic, and comically dramatic.
Severely depressed and in a silent panic.
Practically sleepless, it’s fairly fantastic.
My memory I mean,
If all my senses witness a scene
The info is sealed within me perfectly,
Perceptually and verbally,
Non-mutational, stability.

In the short term, unfortunately,
My focus is overloaded with scenery
Of bullies, abusers, and over-users.
It’s misery listening to scratched records on repeat,
Immune to wrecking.
For that I thank my ([ADHD)]: predominately inattentive
Wtih dsylixea, definitive alcoholism, drug addiction, and the list goes on.
So yeah, I’m on the spectrum, I’m a functional positron.

“That guy’s *******, He can’t even act right.
He’s emotionless, a mindless robot.
There’s no empathy in that golem.
That ugly alien’ll never be like you or me,
He’s clueless, aloof and downright foolish.
So let’s just forget that freak, he kinda scares us.”

Oh yeah?
Well keep that **** in your ******,
Order the facts and double check’em.

“We're not so different you, me, and them.
We just built a bent border 'round the word disorder.
Sure, that’s the preference, to make no inference.
Ignorance is bliss, right?”

For my defense?
Well golly-gee thanks, that’s all lovely and great.
But now the neurologically typical person
Thinks they can fix me, without knowing my burdens
Like, “you’s gots a d’zeez cuz’a factseens”

This "cray" **** gets me irate.
Diagnoseez wrapped in fear-mongering, seen with hate,
And convinced to wait for a miracle.
Well too bad so sad,
The difference is anatomical.
So treating me means training me
To be “normal, deviations nominal.”

(Am I ******’a dog, what the ****?!
Wait, back it up and mix that bit up.)
“What the ****, am I a ******’ dog?!
Oh, if they knew the truth they’d think I’m a ******* demigod.”
(Ha right, more like a log full buried eternally in'a boggle.)

My parents tried and tried for my birth,
They almost considered me impossible.
I was nearly inconceivable.
Then the multi-verse cursed,
And that message was receivable,
I heard it was a freakin’ miracle.
Not that mom cared, she was irresponsible.
Wanted to be a free mirth queen.

Aww, she just needed security.
Even after my birth on Friday 3/13/92 into a noose,
Loosely scorned and hardly lyrical.
They had to remove me surgically from the womb and
Now I've grown oddly into a super human body.

I’m physically atypical with an extra lumbar vertebra.
Some think me mythical, my hearts cage is even, part of a
Hard skeleton wearin’ *** appeal and a
Strong fresh sheath of flesh that’s quick to heal.
Ask me to speak, out comes a voice so deep you’d think the sky fell.

I’m mentally inexplicable,
Thinking in infinite Voices simultaneously painting imagery indefinitely.  
It has me lagging in a neuronal-conundrum.
I’m containing a brain wound up and
So over-wired it's redundant.

Making my head so heavy the ground is over-tired,
Barely overcoming addiction to dilating mundane details.
And a bit slow to obtain'em,
Those growing verbal-perceptual rains of information.
It's why I'm highly aware of the visual-spatial patterned puzzle pieces of existence.

So my mind is orbiting off in the distance,
Oblivious to non-verbal relation,
Just spaced-out communication.
I'm nearly incompatible
With most people in this global nation.
Everyone's got recipes for lemonade,
And I've got durian, that's **** ironical.
I told you, the difference is anatomical.
Can't be changed, so forget being normal tragically!

“That’s great and all,
But you still can’t communicate,
Associate,
Or surmount your human viewpoint
And recreate.
So what’s the point, you’ll never amount
And you shouldn't be allowed to procreate,
Just **** yourself.”

Shut the **** up, mate!
No one is beyond help,
And I'm in good health.
So who says I need your help.

I’m a catch-it-all trainer,
Long distance sprinter,
Heavy weight lifter,
Martial arts practitioner,
And Muay Thai fighter
Of the metaphysical plane or
Flyin’ my x-wing, taking out tie fighters.
Muckin’ up misinformed storm troopers,
Shovin’ **** back down their word poopers.

Yeah, I’ve tried playin’ The Game
That society designed.
But that sick joke
Was painfully lame.
And the punchline,
All but broke me.


I died philosophically.
Spent three days regenerating.
Re-writing my subconscious poetry
Like The Doct-uh,
The Boo-duh,
Or Mist-uh
Believe-in-me.

Pulverizing words into compost,
Composing metaphor to re-code seeds
Set to regrow self-trees from the ground up.
Splitting myself up into three categories,
(Mind), [body], and {me} all clowned up.

It is a truly significant allegory,
Greening my being with jocundity.
Creating profundity for gardening,
Generalizing and broadening the concept
And applying it metaphorically.

In the attempt
To join fantasy
With reality
And become truly
One with “we”;
Livin' and loven'in
Disparity and hilarity
Of you,
Me,
And every fellow
There is to see.

So, “hello
i am the gardener and
i am jocund and
…|[{(i am)}]|…
quite pleased
to meet
we.”
MST Jul 2014
I have a college degree,
no money,
an idea in my head,
and that is all I can see.
Make money, be happy,
made out to be,
the simplest thing.
But when dropped like a fish out of water,
into the so called social society,
without you I am a lifter with no spotter,
and the cure to my sobriety.
So let us see if I can swim to shore,
and get the breath of fresh water,
and you can be there like you swore,
to save me from the slaughter.
You will be my anchor to hold me under.
Amelia Jo Anne Nov 2013
forever coded diaries since I found trust lost on her and him. I hate that the only people willing to listen to me are getting paid for it or beside me in purgatory. don't assume I'm being over-dramatic; I'm not saying my wounds hurt the most, but understand me: deal with half the **** I have & then walk a straight line again.

I am the one who dies a little every time I wake up & realize I'm exactly where I laid myself down. I am the one who breathes corrosion, feeds distortion, bathes in corruption. I straddle fences & hem and haw, biting nails & wraps arms around legs to hold self together. I am the one who cares so much I cannot care. I am the one that uses each breath to fuel my obsession with asphyxiation. I am the borders of the spectrum I see the symmetry in opposites, I pause on polarities. the Yes! Sure. Why Not? I am the moment & I wish that I wouldn't have to live in it. I am the lifter, the sorter & sifter of things my parents over looked or over turned.
Quiet hours,
You will always be my wildflower.

"I am the one..." journal entry exercise (edited and partially rewritten later)
Infamous one Apr 2013
That moment you know someone is doing bad
Eventually the caught up and might drag you into the drama.
In and out of the circle time and time again I honestly don't care to be involved anymore.
Most of the time it's yelling and arguing I don't have time for that!
I respect your way but its not the best way for me.
You might be pushing yourself because you want it but that has nothing to do with me ill encourage
It's up to you to get it done, my health goals are up and down! Yours go for a while then drop dead cold. Everyday I do something physical and productive.
Lift weights or take a jog to release anger and tension
I also enjoy writing it organizes my mind and gets thing set up so I could my plans into action
Ken Pepiton Nov 2018
there may be a time when I'm removed far enough

… but no, not today, today, I ask
new mercies, and
I recall, that's on auto. Hapsthappeneverday kinda thing.
Time after time.
That is a miracle, time.

Really smart
people, that class that feels included in the
we, the
people, politico-intellect-ism trend sect,
they think the math is there to prove

time is
what clocks do, (Royal Institute Youtube watch it)
                                                  
that we,
that ain't me, ye see, I got

removed far enough
to see the blurry
next res
bigger picture more pixels than an eye is said able to see

So for everlasting ideas,
like hell and
heaven,  

the re act
to my act is the power
to act. Eternal motion as perpetual
as can be imagined by mortals, for sure.

Get it together or you leave a huge hole in the fabric of reality JBP

play the role your hand finds dealt,
your special way,
words count inbetween the sayer/hearer
the idle wons are wins not worth the weight, don't fight
the value system that makes life spirial,
swirl of a wand, mathematically
bowing to magi
Fibbo, go viral
with my wind.

this is your life role,
the one in eight billion role.
the star of the show as the hero of hormone wars.
it's all in your head,

how did it *** there, howditgit
this way
this is crazy. No, you never saw crazy, old dude.

Ya had yo'own knows sparkin' at the grindstone,

whet the edge,
or put to more labor..

removed
far enough from this world

my bubble
is in it not of it,
… since 1970. No ****. Outathis world…

Crazy was the melding  from the sixties to…

I was thinking, to about the mid-eighties, but
now,
you and I, we travelled to the beat of several
different drums.
Olde dude,

If you put your nose to the grind, ******
you may have missed,
in fifty years,
more
than you imagined, now, is a new day time.

Some seed never sown back when, can be sown and
grown right,
now.
That's good.
I'd say some words I've helped be heard have

made the world some better'nitwas when we stopped.

time to roll.

Sisyphus, right. 'Never missed a trick time
it takes to roll the rock up,
then in between tick time
to roll the rock up,

onus minus the roll down, the unshackled wireless
inbetween shameless blameless
imagine
happy ever after…
How?
Pretend, the end.

Push, happy as hell.
tick, time
to roll the rock up,

Incorrectness of value of value from the gitgo,
like buttoning your shirt wrong from the first button,
as soon as you fix it, it's fixed.

Nothin' you can do?
Do nothin'.

Think, Sisyphus, happy

Happy he's not in that time we are so removed from
now
slow and steady kinda wins the race, she said that,

Ben or me? Where does the thread un-ravel?

Extended time model, Rogan in the back ground,
what myth has the fear factor guy,
a little short power-lifter-kick boxer guy,
some smart, quick of wit, a hunter,

who was asked, in Thailand,
Have you seen the true beauty of the elephant?
I was asked that, in Thailand,
by a saffroned monk at a kickboxing match
in the jungle in 1968.
Synchroni-city or what?

Who could steer it's  hearing
by a clock and fail

to hear the rhythm of the rock rolling down the hill,
inbetween
the tick…

Sisyphus says time is more effective,

if-ity-ish when,
and only then, when ticks hapt to be

at the very point of return
time
the roll back
no rush, no dread no worry, imagine

time ticks at the sharpest point of the story
at the very very very tippy top
point in time

defining you.
Shame, sticks to you like tar.
Marilyn and Monica and Marla and all

Fame to blame, to shame for being  a believer that
there may be a time when I'm removed far enough

to ignor my own ignorance and innocence
of ideas that possessed
fools

A murderous assault on your attention span,
musicals, those people really live near enough my bubble,
that I can find
ripples

from decades I missed, this is 2018, how can it get better?

The grand wizard cat. pop. elephants are so sweet,
dam,
rewound. Really,
cool, I know what he says next, it's funny before it's funny.

Today is a real good day to get away. Binging Rogan,
testing a mystery fruct-ification
of a single seed from
a sack 'shake.

----
As you move forward in time how do you measure

progress
lo-res thinking, 72 dpi 1984 Macintosh. Hello

now there is reality at the speed of thought, imagine

this was once the speed of thought.

===
why are you in pain? Do you know any lies you believe?
Do you
urge others to suspend their un-belief
to hear you think

listen
ridiculously (is that a good word)

listen, people become interesting, from a distance,
thank you,
I'''''''''''''''''''''''''''''
Earlier on the Sisyphus Happy channel
Emily Rene Dec 2014
In second grade, we did an experiment with static electricity
We rubbed balloons on our heads,
& stuck them to walls
& kissing you is kinda like that
My hair stands on end,
I get shocked when I touch things
& I want to tell you stupid stuff like,
kissing you is a bundle of kittens
colliding with my face at .5 miles an hour
It's like being shot with a dart gun
made of hummingbirds
that shoots darts made of hummingbirds

& your lips are so soft,
I can't actually tell when we are touching,
like braiding hair underwater,
like napping under a blanket filled with rainbows & clouds,
& your favorite books

When you kiss me,
the cartoon devil & angel on my shoulder
climb into my ears,
like all of my neurons,
& start ******* on my brainsteam
If you were a 300 pound professional weight lifter
& if I were a Kia Sorento,
you could drag me anywhere

Kissing you is patient & impossibly slow,
like peeling paint off the wall with glittery stickers,
or cooking a turkey with a lighter
You remind me of the time in second grade
when Bethany Hopkirk
called me a freak face & stabbed me in the arm with a pencil
Cause kissing you is kinda like that,
unhealthy & will probably result in disfigurement
But baby, bring on the ****** scars & lead poisoning
Cause when you kiss me,
you are dangling me off a bridge by a belt
You are the screen door of my childhood,
all taste & swinging
So full of holes you could never keep anything in

You are every black eye,
you're a semitruck & I'm a turtle with two broken legs,
& a broken heart
You are illegal fireworks falling down stairs together,
driving on four flat tires,
playing frisbee at night with a saw blade
Kissing you is like falling out of a 37 story window,
exploding into a cloud of robins
& reappearing on the ground with my mouth full of feathers

& when I can't kiss you,
I try to find the static electricity in my apartment
I dig around in light sockets,
change lightbulbs with my teeth,
& make out with the toaster
& I know we've only been seeing eachother
for a couple of weeks,

But baby, when you kiss me,
I can't remember my middle name,
or which one is my left foot
So come over tonight
We'll shuffle around the apartment in our socks,
& we'll let our lips drift toward each other,
like tectonic plates made...

out of kittens
Neil Hilborn
Zongo Mar 2016
I was in a strange place most call it Florida the land of sweltering heat and bad choices .
I had no friends to speak of I was alone afraid but not naked unlike those ******'s on TV .

Hey **** **** the rude oversized man yelled at me from my comfy usal sleeping place underneath the booth .

What did I ******* tell you bout sleeping in this place ?
Umm honestly dude I was to drunk to remember that and I was far to busy trying to pick up your sister man she's gotta great rack your family must be so proud.

look ******* I'm tired of your **** and smart mouth every night its the same old **** with you .
You get blasted insult half the place then crawl off and try to sleep making me have to beat your *** and toss you out the door you ever get tired of getting slapped around?

Well now that you put it that way it does seem like a vicious cycle
but hey I mean does your sister ever tire of turning tricks in the restroom to help pay for your *** change ?

The over sized bouncer seemed slightly upset at that last comment as his steroid fed veins popped up on his neck wow he must be really ******* guess it truly would matter to someone who cared .

You ******* I'm going beat the **** out of your drunken *** .
I just love it when you talk **** sweetheart but why not skip the foreplay I mean sure who doesn't enjoy some heavy petting and **** grabbing maybe a sloppy kiss or two I'm kidding only women dig that **** men don't need to set the mood usually.
Hey want to ****?
Works just fine ah romance isn't it grand?

The muscle bound frustrated weight lifter was on the verge of blowing a gasket but I never judge a man by his ****** preference I mean seriously I went to college I mean  I didn't study there or anything but hey at those drunken frat parties its not like anyone noticed I didn't belong .
Besides the jocks were far to busy trying to ******* the cheerleaders .

Yeah remind me never to dress up like a cheerleader again on Halloween .
And never tell a football **** you used to be a tight end
that **** hurt but enough with memory lane darlings .

My ******* dance partner slash sleep interrupting bouncer ******* .
Was licking his chops just imaging the thought of twisting my spine in several directions  .

Sure  he may not have been smart but when you bench press a small car and stand seven foot tall does it truly ******* matter?

For a second my buzz wore off and allowed something I seldom have to slip back into my thoughts .
Common sense cause the thought of being turned into a human basket ball truly didn't sound all that alluring

Look Conan sure you can get all  riod raged over my lack of respect for the rules but much like ******* who own this site you will learn its best to ignore me and bury my work while eight year olds trend ripping off pop songs  .
And yes kids that's what we call a dig  don't worry  its far from the last .

I mean sure we can fight you can break my bones bruise my ego but one way or the other I will probably surprise you much like your parents did when they informed you weren't really there's.
I mean most people want to wash the **** off them the gorillas at the zoo throw at them .
Where your mom cleaned it up took it home and named it whatever the hell your name is.

You ******* loud mouthed ***** that's it no more talking lets do this .
There wasn't any reasoning with this unhappy muscle monkey .
Guess my charm was lost in his lift heavy things up then put them down logic .

We went into the alley along with half the people that were in the bar apparently they truly were starved for entertainment.
That and they wanted to see me be murdered.
Tuff crowd must have been something I said .

Kick his ******* *** Frank! One guy yelled .
Yeah break his jaw Franky another woman said .
Don't worry this is going to be a cake walk guys.

The bouncer said as he pounded his fist into his hand a few times .
For all his puffing up he seemed perplexed why I  hadn't even taken off my glasses or put down my beer for that matter .

I just viewed him getting more and more angry as I laughed .
Only further enraging him more .

What the ******* laughing at ******!!!
You really really sure you want to do this big guy?
Yeah stupid why you think I'm out here ?

Honestly I thought for a change of atmosphere maybe the smell of some fresh garbage in the air.

Just shut the **** up the talk ends now!!!

He walked forward his hands clenched but was thrown off as I put my hands up .
I just got to say before this sorry .

What the hell are you talking bout you stupid ******* ?
Well sorry cause it's really going to hurt there big guy .

Yeah when I crush your skull you got that right *******!.

No silly muscle man my surprise.
He laughed looking at me as if I were  half insane almost puzzled much the way most people view me .

What ******* surprise !?

I took a nice long sip of my bourbon and coke .
Well big guy your standing in a puddle of **** and I got a police issue tazer .

He didn't even have a chance to look down as he would have noticed the little red dot on his chest .

Oh **** was all that the mountain of a man muttered as his body was lit up like a Christmas tree.

The thud sounded like a old oak hitting the ground .
I kept pulling the trigger as he flopped around like a fish outta water .
The crowd looked at me with a sense of disgust the old woman who had cheered on the want to be pro wrestler to break my neck  .

Looked at me and said you are a no good cheat .
Why thank you my drunken washed up old **** of a friend .

They all began to head back into the bar as I left the human boulder laying in a puddle of **** .

Remember children never fight fair always fight to win.

Fin.
John McCove Dec 2018
Library lifter
Came to my study
He made all precautions
Mom’s sleeping
Mind’s blowing
He’s stepping smoothly
Right into my precious hub
With fairly ***** intentions

He carries his box of instruments
With screwdrivers of all types
To turn my guts inside out
With spanners of all sizes
To tighten up my nuts

He’s sitting on my lap
Reading me my book
My favorite childish book
He’s putting me down
Into a deep slumber
With his sweet lullaby
My grave been prepped in advance
Somewhere down the street
Next to the Milky Way  

Library lifter
Soul collector  
Made a good job
Once again
SG Holter Nov 2016
They wrote about you.
Named you Goddess and  
Lifted you high above the

Imagined boundaries of your
Spirit and ***.
No longer seeming as little as

You always felt. Well...
The rains came; you became
Umbrella.

Cinderella's indecisive cousin.
Wet now, and not in the
Good, hot way.

Workmen's sweat fresh from
Frustrated chests upon your ever
Forgiving back.

Heathens in the temple.
Berserkers in the
Cathedral.

Male pens, shovels and clamps
Made for grabbing and digging,
Holding up towards God's Skies

And proclaiming, not "Her,"
But: "Mine!"
I've seen it as it is.

Oh, I know. I've been a lifter.
Shoving goddesses into brick sized
Holes, praising the solid

Wall.
You deserve better. Take it from
Iron:

There is not enough
Gold in your
Life.
SøułSurvivør Nov 2017
You helped me heft
My burdens
You shared in all my cares
You also heavy laden
Your own loads in which to bear.

You took me through
The Bible
Through the stormy seas
Of my misunderstandings
You helped me to ease

Through thick & thin
Supported me
A stalwart friend so true
I could n'er find another
More trustworthy than you!

As a supporter you excell
There to lend a hand
You garner no great glory
As by my side you stand.

You're the lifter of my arms
A background tune that sings
You're an inspiring backdrop
The wind beneith my wings.

Please know that I have
Great respect
For you are from above
I will ever cherish you...

You'll always be LOVED.


SøułSurvivør
(C) 11/5/2017
To a very dear friend who has always helped me to understand the Bible and its correlation to every aspect of life. She has been a wonderful support in every way. I believe the armor bearer is more important than the warrior. This lady has a TRUE servant's heart... she is dearly LOVED!
Mary McCray Apr 2016
(NaPoWriMo Challenge: April 5, 2016)

When I was a child a relative told me
the English do not eat tomatoes.
And I cannot let go of the false idea,
the tomato-ness of America.
Large Red, Old Virginia,
the Mortgage Lifter—
these all sound gravely patriotic.
As does Martian or Mountain Princess,
like some Appalachian fruit.
Even the almost allegorical
Early Abe. But what about the purist,
the Romaist, if you will, the one-kind
of onion eater who won’t take artichokes
or okra, lives on peas and is a veritable
celery-heart, consumes eggplant only as a slur,
garlic as jewelry; potato is his credo.

Take the speckled small watermelon,
red with evaporating streaks of green.
The part of this and the part of that.
The half breed, the synthesis, the cauliflora
extraordinary. Full of halves. I know
quite a few people who would refuse it.
NiTSUDD Oct 2016
I breathe deep in the chemicals
Oh I just love the taste
I had the world grabbed by the tail
But it cut itself off at the waste

My skin is cracked by the coldness
My eyes are red from the plants
You were dead gorgeous in that black dress
But i wouldnt give you a single dance

Barred from the club in space
The expelled list bares my name
Isolated from starlight space
With only myself to blame
Thinking of You Jul 2021
You have this little sigh you do.
When something is bothering you.
In the exhale there is weight.
All I want to do is take the load off of you.
That was one of the first times I realized I loved you.
I was getting stronger, but not for myself.
Geno Cattouse Jun 2013
Man. Circle the wagons and throw a log on the fire.
Gettin your cookies of in a  Canvas schooner.
Caused. Lotta P E. comin sooner and sooner.

Lookin over your shoulder for the old scalp lifter.
Jump up buckle up gave her half a bone.
Didn't even get a chance ta moan and groan.

Pulem.to the side no time to for.4 play.
Get in where you fit in its my birthday by the way. ... wink.. nudge.

Leave the fire on low.
Be back in an hour ***.
Maybe I can get you ta clean my gun.....no ?


Naw........
Nicholas Fogle Jun 2015
My heart is an Anchor.
A dead weight.
And a life lifter.

My mouth a funnel,
my throat the tunnel,
and my heart the core from which words irrigate.

My mind is the filter.
Some times nondescript I elicit words and rhymes explicit
about how my mind sits in a different dimension where words are living.

My heart is here anchored and grounded.
Sometimes I feel like earth-bonded solid mountain.
Sometimes I feel like a Soul punished and grounded.
Heart on a nutshell
wordvango Nov 2018
Been a
Small player a
Bit part actor
One of the cast
In an off Broadway play

Been a
Smart *** a
wit less loser
One of the bell
bottomed long hairs

Been a
Lover cast
Aside useless
broken a piece of
worthlessness

Been a
Powerless
Where is
my next meal
Coming from beggar

And I've
Made it here
Where I grasped
saw seen realized
it's never been
About me

So I have
Been a
lifter up a positive
Force in this seemingly
hopeless universe

Since.
I.
The gleaming moon shined light
Emits bright luminesce, Paul holding his breath.
Floats over the hills
Valleys and streams, shadow of doubts.
Count it, another star rises!
And falls burning.
He wonders about the lantern of faith,
hides an omen of a stormy night

II.
Of those star turbulences of tragedy
Of these days passed with no respite

He lifted the lantern, his soul withstood.
He pondered on a one-way path
Confused but never scared, Listen-
the mountains echoed

III.

A lantern luminates its own soul
and
you are my light, Paul mumbles,
Absorbing all sparkles, Look
over folk lore, they glow.
Glittery magic, under a mellow hill
He lifted the lantern, a full moon
the faith and fairies bestow

04/July/2020
A. Lantern lifer is a one who could share the light and extinct from the pain
David Cunha Jul 2017
Love is a not war
But against ourselves,

A will changing
Passion lifter
Bone breaking
Hand scarring
Feet burning,

It has not much to do with the heart
As it slices our brain in half
And we love it
Like loony maniacs who never had a cookie in their lifetime.
july 3, 2017
1:18 p.m.
PABRO Mar 2019
They said,no avail
No better for you
Just because your life is hell
Or ,you are out of fuel.

The heavy words you lift
they have made you  
A good craft lifter,
See now,you are painted bright colours

You never ever anticipated
You were dimmed like light
they wanted to see the darked
Side of you but you were the twilight

And the star in their lives
Now they have started
finger pointing see what you have become
You are now a recognized institution

To them, to the entire nations
Don't think its an image of imaginations
Their is a battle of incantations
They made in an absence of light

Before you,
or rather before me either before  the nation
They said you're nothing
You can't do anything

Just see their tummies
Oh-oooh, they are now fries
Who were saying
Just quit and do something

Often they're now scared of you
Merely a single time
They never trusted you
Because you were looking same

No more shading tears,
You're a fully time grown up man
Continue changing the gears,
to reach were they never reached before."

"it only takes a step
things to get better in life. "
That was my daily quote for you I had.

They lied themselves,
because their eyes were bricking so fast,
the prediction of their colours turned brown to rust,
so they failed to test the sweetest so fast

they never ever thought
You will be honoured by the people of the nations.

"Remember,you have just set a light in their lives."
Nick Moser May 2014
I was never the most handsome thing to look at.
I never had nerves of steel or confidence of a God.
I never had the best financial situation.
Or the best hair.
I never had the physique of a male weight-lifter.
Or football player.
Or dancer.
Or even ping pong player.
I never knew how to capitalize on opportunities like other guys did.
I never knew how to stand comfortably in my own shoes.
I always seemed to mess up.
To botch my words.
Ruin the moment.
Poison the air with my disappointing appearance.
I never had my emotions figured out.
I never seemed to enjoy a day of happiness.
Because I was too far lost in sadness.
I lost my forest through the trees.
I never even had a forest.
I never had a place where seeds of hope could grow into trees of glory.
Where my legacy could live on forever.
Where my love could rejuvenate even the sickest of souls.
I never had an opportunity to show what my love really could do.
But I always had love to give.
Too bad I never had anyone in line who wanted to receive it.
Reading... Readi... Read.... R............................
God's power works best in my weakness
God pours out himself by the holy spirit
my faith makes me whole in spirit, soul & body
I empty my mind of all thoughts except for the thought of God

God's infinite love and grace is what gives me life
i will give thanks to theLord for his mercy endures forever
every word of God is pure he is a shield that puts their trust in him
I am open to the wisdom and peace of God as he guides me in everything I do

the Lord is with me where ever I go
in God I trust & am no afraid
your help has made me great
I live by faith not by sight

The same love that God has for Jesus is in me
I am open to the healing power of the Lord
I waited patiently for the Lord & he heard my cry
a song of praise to our God

............................................................­.......

his will stregthens my heart
you oh Lord am a shield above me and the lifter of my head

the Lord is near to the broken hearted
they that wait for the Lord shall renew their stregnth

I am gentle and lowly in heart you will find rest for your souls

the eternal God is the light that shines through the darkness
the Lord turns my darkness into light

the best thing to do right now is to put your faith in God
put your hope in God for I will yet praise him my God

be strong and take heart all you that trust in the Lord
I let go oof fear I let go of pain

praise be to the father of our Lord Jesus Christ
I am willing to be transformed by the renewing of my mind

humble yourselves therefore under God's mighty hand
have pity on me oh Lord

do not be anxious about anything let your requests be known onto God
I can experience the joy of authentic service through God
.............................................................­............

I will praise ye oh Lord with all my heart comfort my spirit
the Lord God is in your midst the mighty one he will save

I surrender all my problems to God as he bares that burden for me
the Lord watches over you the Lord will keep you from all harm

the Lord will watch over your life
I put myself in God's hands

dry bones hear the word of the Lord
behold I will cause breath to enter you & you shall live

I ask for forgiveness from all I have wronged me
I never lose heart for God is caring for me

I choose a mind of faith case that is a way forward
Lord let your ear be attentive to this here your servant

I am redeemed each day I'm reborn a fresh
trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your understanding

faith shelters me in storms releases me from self absorption

.....................................................­......................................

then they cried in the Lord in their troubles and saved them in their distress
the Lord is my strength and shield

praise the Lord my soul don't forget all his benefits
he crowns you with loving kindness

satisfies you in good things so your youth is renewed as the eagle
may God himself sanctifies you through & through

the grass withers and the flowers fall but the word of our God stands forever
your word is a lamp for my feet a light for my path

I have the anointing of Jesus through the power of the holy spirit
God's power works best in my weakness

God pours out his love into my heart by the holy spirit
my faith makes me whole in spirit, soul & body

I empty my mind from all thoughts except for the thought of God
Yuki Jan 2019
What should I do
when my heart
feels so heavy?
I am not much of
a weight lifter,
I do not know
how to raise it
from the ashes
and bring it back to life.
JP Nov 2016
a
Weight lifter
won a medal
for lifting 100 KG
came home
an intimacy on bed....
His wife
carried his body weight of
105 KG....
Rahama Aug 2020
It's been a while
I know
I remember
It's just that time flies so fast
And somehow I lost myself
And my bearings
And my visions
These days I wake up and I forget to pray
My thoughts immediately flying to all the things that need to be done
Problems that need to be solved
But in the midst of it
It became too much
So I ran
And now I'm back

I missed you
You were my source of release
The lifter of these burdens
Did you miss me?
Did you miss hearing me whine?
About every little thing?
Did you miss the way I would twist my words until they sang a deliberate melody?
I hope you did
Cause I missed you
And hopefully I'm back for good.
Hello my HePo Fam. I have missed you❤️
anthony Brady Oct 2018
The actual advertisement in “Ireland’s Own” Men Seeking Women columns read as follows:  "Lone farmer – Born on Christmas Day - solvent - Has traditional values - Seeks a hefty lady from 40 upwards - Photographs exchanged. Kilmacat, Limerick 00649280942"
A Christmas Card with photo arrives. The farmer gets a call...

Hefty Lady: Happy Birthday!
What are your cows like?
Farmer: Funny you should ask -
they are known as laughing stock.
Unable to produce young. Anti-bull.

HL:  Can you promise there will no
secrets between us?
F: Can’t say for sure.
The potatoes have eyes,
the corn has ears.

HL: My photo makes me
look like the Venus de Milo.
F: I noticed. You've got no arms.
You won't do. I need a heavy lifter.

HL: My arms are out of
the photo because I’m lifting..
F: What weight are
you lifting?
HL: 128 kilos  -
Kleen & ******  –
world record.

F: Is that the name
of a tractor?
HL: Nien!

F: What’s your name?
HL: Bertha Eva Tunne.

Farmer: I want to see your calves.
Hefty Lady: I will bring them with me.
Farmer: Happy Christmas!
The plane tickets are in the post.

Tobias
The actual advertisement in “Ireland’s Own” Men Seeking Women columns read as follows:  "Elderly farmer – Born on Christmas Day - solvent - has traditional values - seeks a hefty lady from 40 upwards - photographs exchanged."  
He gets a telephone reply..
the wallflower Mar 2018
When people expect the worst from you
It's really truly hard to maintain a positive attitude
So then you start presenting what their expecting
And it's so **** hard to keep those tears from slipping down your face
Because your parents have the audacity
To tell you that you make more mistakes
Compared to how many times you have made them smile
And you regret choosing to live at home  
You regret living in general
Because living is difficult
But people told you that you were strong and you believed them
You believed the pretty poisoned lies they told you
To make you feel like a better person
And you said “ your right , i can do this “
And that was that
But you noticed the more people know about how your feeling
The more pain you feel
So you stop
You stop showing what the sadness is doing to you on the outside
On the inside
And you somehow get away with it
Until your psychiatrist asks how you're doing and you can't keep it in anymore
You tell her that mountains of painkillers and antidepressants
Are beckoning to you sweetly
You play around with your wording because you want to be remembered
With a sense of humor before you die
And she calls your mother in
And she cries
Because the daughter she gave birth to doesn't even want it
But she understands!
She understands your pain because your own mother is dealing with some of her own
They call security
They call the paramedics
They come into the room that your in and you look away
The officer says “ You have a whole life to live “
You smirk and a single tear falls down your face as you chuckle
“ This isn't living “
Your mother ***** in a breath and lets out a thundering sob
She pulls you into a bone crushing hug and you tell her that your sorry
And as you repeat the overused sentiment you wonder what your sorry for
If your even truly sorry
Please help me understand …
Your sorry for making someone feel bad because you feel worse ?
Your sorry because you feel mocked by people that tell you to get over it
When they happen to not give a single thought EVER about anyone but themselves
And my person inside me begs for me to scream  “YOU HAVEN'T SUFFERED ENOUGH !”
No
They haven't
While the sun arises each and every morning for the blessed and humble
Your sun hasn't risen for years now
Instead a plastic and artificial version of what the sun should be ascends into your day
And shines in your eyes and taunts you
It laughs at you because YOU have more scars than friends
YOU can't go places alone because your suicidal tendencies screams louder
Than your mother yelling from the outside of the ambulance
“YOUR GOING TO BE OKAY!”
And you wave
You wave your hand to your mother as your taken to a wretched place
That throws you out worse than the way you were when you walked in
One month passes
Your home
But your parents are treating you like polypropylene
Tough enough to still be parented
But still weak , still a bit vulnerable
Six months pass
You become a ***
You make relationships with people
Because they make you feel good about yourself
And you foolishly get attached
Because your addicted to the feeling you get when they leave
Heart Wrenching sadness
Your so accustomed to it
And you think that the taste of salty tears would grow old
But depression comes in all different flavors
And when they bid you farewell
You promise yourself , no more
No more people
Just focus on yourself
But there is nothing to focus on
Because your so ******* broken that only the pieces of your shattered heart remain
And it's hard to explain what's going on inside your tangled mind
Your not even allowed to be okay when your not okay
Not allowed to smile in the midst of your tragedy
Because everybody is expecting you to be this sad piece of nothing
So when your anything and everything your not
You get **** for it
You’ve been getting **** for it
To this day you hide how you feel because the truth is to abhorrent to bear
Anytime you say that you don't want to do this anymore
Society says “ Your lying “
And you feed yourself lies
You tell yourself that your not enough
That you have never been enough
You never meet anybody's expectations
And you lean towards believing
That disappointment is just another form of terror
To cause trauma to what's left of your heart
And the worst thing about being a disappointment
Is the lack of trust from other people
They don't expect you to be there for them
Because the silence you were unknowingly feeding them is causing them to choke
And then everybody is gone
And you're to blame
YOUR TO BLAME
And you wonder and ponder upon ways to fix your heart
But it's not that easy
You need tools to fix something that is broken
Everyone who loved you were your tools
Tools no longer
You were the heavy lifter
You carried your overweight broken heart because ironically
You were the only one with that type of strength
So now your learning not to put it on the line
The hard way
Your lugging it behind you tied to a string because it fell off your shoulder
And you start to realize that absence makes the heart grow fonder
And that confuses you
Because its dead
Or so you thought
No matter how broken it is …
Your heart is the only thing that wont give up on you mentally
“If i could i would **** every insecurity that told you that you weren't enough “
remember how we forgot . no on really died in the wars we fought
Ken Pepiton May 13
there may be a time when I'm removed far enough

… but no, not today, today, I ask
new mercies, and
I recall, that's on auto.
Hapst'happeneverday kinda thing.
Time after time.
That is a miracle, time.

Really smart
people, that class that feels included
in the
we, the people,
politico-intellect-ism trend sect,
they think the math is there to prove
right to govern life's use, to insure
future wars have enough infantry.

Lead us away from value testing.
Teach life, teach consequence
with reward for second thoughts,
about why life is sacrifice,
given a random chance
to learn time is
what clocks do, (Royal Institute Youtube watch it)
                                                  
that we,
that ain't me, ye see, I got

removed far enough
to see the blurry
next res
bigger picture more pixels than an eye
is said supposed able to see

So for everlasting ideas,
like hell and
heaven,  

the re act
to my act is the power
to act. Eternal motion as perpetual
as can be imagined by mortals, for sure.

"Get it together or you leave a huge hole
in the fabric of reality" JBP once said

play the role your hand finds dealt,
your special way,
words count
inbetween the sayer/hearer
the idle wons are wins not worth the weight, don't fight
the value system that makes life spirial,
swirl of a wand, mathematically
bowing to magi
Fibbo, go viral
with my wind… nacci

this is your life role,
the one in eight billion role.
the star of the show as the hero
of hormone wars.
it's all
in your head, and gut and glands

how did it *** there, howditgit
this way
this is crazy.
No, you never saw crazy, old dude.
says future me to then me, back when…
Ya had yo'own knows sparkin' at the grindstone,

whet the edge,
or put to more labor..

removed
far enough from this world

my bubble
is in it not of it,
… since 1970. No ****. Outathis world…

Crazy was the melding  from the sixties to…

I was thinking, to about the mid-eighties, but
now,
you and I, we travelled
to the beat of several
different drums.
Olde riders
through the storms, all the make believe
historical excuses used to justify the cost
of war readiness implanted in children,

noble ways to die
for the truth we believe, true,
and those who do not, we live to ****.

If you put your nose to the grind,
******, you may have missed,
in fifty years, more
than you imagined, now,
is a new day time.
May 2024 Earth.

Some seed never sown back when,
can be sown and
grown right,
now.
That's good.
I'd say some words I've helped be heard have

made the world some better'nitwas
when we stopped.

time to roll.
Need some help?

Sisyphus, right.

'Never missed a trick time
it takes
to roll the rock up,
then in between tick time
to roll the rock up,
- as we meander down the ramp
onus minus
the stroll down, in
the unshackled wireless
inbetween shameless blameless
imagined-reified whatifery
happy ever after…
How?
Pretend, the end.

Push, happy as hell.
tick, time
to roll the rock up,

Incorrectness of value
of value
from the gitgo,
like buttoning your shirt wrong
from the first button,
as soon as you fix it,
it's fixed.

Nothin' you can do?
Do nothin'.

Think, Sisyphus, happy

Happy he's not
in that time we are so removed from
now
slow and steady kinda wins the race,
she said that, to

Ben or me? Where does the thread un-ravel?

Extended time model, Rogan
in the back ground,
what myth has the fear factor guy,
a little short power-lifter-kick boxer guy,
become some smart, quick of wit, a hunter,
hero, one of the thousand,
who was asked,
in Thailand,
Have you seen the true beauty
of the elephant?

Of course,
I was asked that, in Thailand,
by a saffroned monk
at a kickboxing match
in the jungle
in 1968.
Synchroni-city or what?

Who could steer it's  hearing
by a clock and fail

to hear the rhythm
of the rock rolling down the hill,
inbetween
the tick…

Sisyphus says time is more effective,

if-ity-ish when,
and only then,
when ticks hapt to be

at the very point of return
time
the roll back
no rush, no dread no worry, imagine

time ticks at the sharpest point of the story
at the very very very tippy top
point in time

defining you.
Shame, sticks to you like tar.
Marilyn and Monica and Marla and all

Fame to blame, to shame
for being  a believer that
there may be a time when I'm removed far enough

to ignor my own ignorance and innocence
of ideas that possessed
fools - to teach kids
at Saturday goy kivas, yes.
Like Sabbath school, for gentile kids.
Fourteen cents, for the movie, news and cartoon
dime for treats,
like two Milky Ways, or a bag of real butter popcorn,
and a penny change to toss
in a wisher well
on the way home,
if we pass the old jail,
or a Bazooka,
penny bubble gum...
-----------
A murderous assault
on your attention span,
sit tight and watch the feature
musicals, those people really live
near enough my bubble,
that I can find
ripples

from decades I missed, this is 2018,
how can it get better?

The grand wizard cat. pop.
Elephants are so sweet,
dam,
rewound. Really,
cool, I know what he says next, it's funny before it's funny.

Today is a real good day
to get away. Binging Rogan,
testing a mystery fruct-ification
of a single seed from
a sack o' shake.

----
As you move forward
in time how do you measure
progress
lo-res thinking, 72 dpi 1984 Macintosh. Hello
back a decade,
DEC VAX
holding 27 printed circuit boards,
not chips, 27 to make one CPU,
not 16 bit compatible, 32 bit
turbo fast time shared
million dollar baby,
circa 1970...

now there is reality
at the speed
of thought, imagine

this was once the speed of thought.
card read
thunk
Mimesis conserved conformity... punch
===
why are you in pain?
Do you know any lies you believe?
Do you
urge others
to suspend their un-belief
to hear you think

listen
nidiculously
(is that a good word, yes)
free form floating helpless, us,
listen, people become interesting,
from a distance,
thank you,
I'''''''''''''''''''' we may all live
in interesting times. No resupply ship
was ever coming, we share the air or die.
Started in 2018, picked at since and let be what it seems today// alienating
or big hug envelopment reevaluating evolunteerism in will worship science.
I am no more
than the sum of matter,
mildly organized thoughts
and an ambiguous willing
to contrast and to blend.

I spire down only to find
that what I've been running from
is growing in front of me.

Is the run my true fuel,
is the endless search my Stockholm jailer?

The more I cope,
the more I run,
the more I fight.

There is nothing new inside of me,
just an absurd,
an eternal stone lifter
who keeps running from faith
faster and faster.

I have no such long memory
to tell if it is a circle,
a straight line,
or just a random circuit.

All I have to do
is keep running.
Dennis Willis Nov 2021
Searching thru the
"there is"'s I might employ
there is a way
there is a thing
there is a certain
and flipping 'em over
I find the lifter
of I am telling you
the penetrant  
of the membrane
invading
every molecule of now
you sitting knees up
happy in that chair
there
I am the breeze blowing in the night
The sting of a glove that hits in a fight
I am the burn of the strong blistering sun
The disappointment when a enemy has won
I am the cold in the shivering rain
The ache of a weight lifter feeling the strain
I am the darkness at the bottom of the sea
The mental torture of depression running free
I am reality floating around
I am the natural cause
I am a noise making a sound
I am the maker of wars
Have you guessed me
Worked me out
Have you discovered my name
Cause I am God and I am nature
And nobody escapes my game
Julian Delia May 2019
Elbow-deep in *****;
Got nothing to lose.
An offer from hell;
I couldn’t refuse.

My brain’s out of happy chemicals;
A lifter with broken clavicles.
The air’s too thick, I can’t breathe;
Choked up by smoke and rage as it seethes.

The betrayal of our generation,
Born into destructive condemnation.
Born with a noose, tightly coiled round our necks,
Evil let loose, like a curse from a hex.

Stumbling into adulthood, dazed and confused.
Lesson number one -
If you’ve got a conscience, best leave it unused.
Binge-drinking, to refrain us from thinking.
A ship that’s sinking, eyes that are blinking,
Frantically keeping up with tear ducts,
But hey, at least you still feel something!
This heart has been seared, shut.

In fact, tears don’t fall down these cheeks, no more.
Crystallised pain; time to settle the score.
Time to take aim on those who came before,
Those who left us wastelands, a world forlorn.

No time to unwind, to let one’s guard down.
We must take back our homes, our streets, our towns,
It’s time to hang, draw and quarter these clowns.

Comrades, born with a guillotine over your head;
Step away from the edge towards which you’re being led,
Let us stop living like we’re the living dead.

Or, at least, let us die trying.
Like lifeless husks, slowly drying.
Our dreams, slowly fading away;
Scraping the bottom of the barrel,
Hoping to make it through the day.

_____
'When society has destroyed all adventure, the only adventure that is left is to destroy that society. Including the self...'
the dirty poet Apr 2022
i’m frankenstein’s masterpiece
constructed from so many components
dad, husband, respiratory therapist
poet, filmmaker, musician, artist
applied physicist, philosopher
bike rider, weight lifter
coffee drinker, reader, television addict
taxpayer, consumer, sucker
emperor of my universe, peon
fearless, fearful, fatalistic
and i know a heap of ***** jokes
ConnectHook Apr 2023
Thou Ethiopian muse of mine: attend.
Now let my words wound souls and after, mend.
It’s time to slay some golden calves and knock
Some gods from off their pedestals. Let’s rock.
(I’d like my veal in gold-dust, with a side
Of injured Afrocentric racial pride.
)

Moses cut an oppressor down, who bled…
Moses buried him in the sand, then fled.
(Every ****** son of Adam bleeds out red.)
Midian offered shelter to the killer.
I hope you like my prefatory filler . . .

Remember in the desert how the tribes
Put up with Moses’ scolding diatribes,
Yet quickly fell for Aaron’s baby bull?
They paid for it, the half and then in full
By wandering around for forty years
And drinking bitter waters (Moses’ tears).
They even whined about his sultry bride;
Not Zipporah—his later, darker ride.
Let Ethiopia rise. She still is blameless
And Moses’ second wife here lauded nameless.

Discerning Israel means: there once were slaves.
Egyptians know the God of Hebrews saves.
Yehudah is no more the chosen clan
Than Joseph is old Pharaoh’s right-hand man.
And who is freed from *******, and who’s not
Should make us pause—observe . . . then think a lot.

Some tribes are pale-faced, others darker still.
And none can claim to grasp God’s perfect will.
Let **** haters rise—and leave the room.
Black racists too, be gone; and I’ll resume
My question: who’s oppressed, and who’s a grifter . . .
And how a curse descends, and what’s the lifter.
Perhaps you are a Hebrew . . . yet, some curse
Is evident in how you make things worse
By raging over long-past wrongs and rights
(Passive-aggressive lovers’ quarrel with whites…)
While Indo-Europeans watch the fun,
All Asia sighs, and prays God’s will be done.

Noah’s second grandson, Canaanite cow,
Oh golden calf, toward whom we’re forced to bow,
You sure can DANCE, and jump, and chant bad rhymes,
Cashing that blank check for slavery’s crimes.
The state commemorates your orator;
Content of character must come later (?)
You crack us up. Pure abomination
Promoted as artistic creation.
Your tag, your name—like ***** sprayed on walls.
Your neighborhood? Wherever garbage falls.
You’re born in freedom. Now you sample beats
Enslaved to violent nonsense in the streets.
That silly slang, new sneakers, dumb fashions
Showcase well your underlying passions.
Egypt’s kings? More like bad dangerous clowns
Revealing thuggish souls in sullen frowns;
Slurring unintelligibly your words
Which leave your lips like Lucifer’s own turds.
You’re laughable in your provocation;
Begging us to adulate your nation.
We must (MUST we?) celebrate your culture
And venerate what spawns from sinful nature.

You say you have it bad, you’re still enchained;
The Civil War unfought and and nothing gained . . .
You claim to be oppressed this day and age?
It seems you’re just excusing childish rage.
Go liberate yourself then, loudmouth slave.
Prove to the world that JESUS cannot SAVE.

Victims exist, others play the Race Card,
And seek a foe to blame when life gets hard.
Or worse: demand race-based reparations
Lining bank accounts with their frustrations.
Such money has been ransomed, in the form
Of public schools and welfare. Bring your storm
Of virtue-signal cries that I’m a bigot;
But spades will be called in spades—so DIG it:
Hope you can keep those Liberals on your side,
To con them as you take them for a ride.
Don’t compromise their cluelessness. Stay woke
To keep us laughing at your ethnic joke:
Ratcheting up the destructive drama.
Hate this whiteness? My reply: Yo’ mama.
For any son can knock up any daughter
Regardless of the racial myths they taught her;
We are one species. Sorry, but it’s true.
(Wish it were not, observing some of you…)

Muse of mine, Kushitic damsel, don’t leave.
You’ve heard me out thus far. I still believe
That there’s a remnant of Man’s fallen race
Who yet can be restored by God’s own grace
Regardless of their smarts, or style, or hue.
Fear GOD and live . . . for such were some of you.

— The End —