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Rahama Nov 2023
When the weirdest words awaken such a consciousness of the distance in between
When my mind suddenly remembers that it's been a million years already
When my heart aches
When my breath's unsteady
When my shoulders shake
And the tears keep coming
When the fear of not reaching you stops me from calling
When my prayers are boxes of deep, deep yearning

It's okay though
I'm not sad
I was
But not anymore
I'm lucky
I have you
You're here
I miss you
I need you
I love you
Carried everywhere
I want you
I'm happy
Soliloquizing
You're not here
You can't hear me
I can't hold you
Come close
I miss you
I feel incomplete.
Rahama Nov 2023
Thousands of conversations ago
I had not the slightest clue
That I would fall in love
With your words
Your ways
Your laughter

Now it resounds through me
Every piece of you that became a part
Of my evolved, convoluted self
I kinda see you not just in every win
But in every dream
And it hurts that I had to let go...

For every moment with you shined.
Rahama Sep 2023
Loving you is such a journey
One designed to bring out the best in me
It's how I've never felt so remorseful about my actions
About telling a lie
I never want to let you down
I never want you to feel unsafe
Not when you're with me
Cause then it'd mean that we are broken
Broken and unable to be fixed

Loving you is such a journey
One designed to bring out the best in me
Although that seems like a long way off
It's a journey worth taking, worth completing
This doesn't rhyme or even correlate
But I just want to say that I truly appreciate
You
For loving me the way that you do
Wholeheartedly
Completely
Even when it comes at the detriment of you
I've tortured myself so bad
Cause it hurts to see you sad
And it's a different kind of pain when the one who should make you feel better
Is the reason why you're falling apart

That I had no words to say
That all I could do was pray
At the mercy of the decisions you make
Not knowing what the consequences would be for my mistake

I'm sorry that I took you on this ride
I know that loving you is a journey
But loving me would probably be space travel
Far more complex and difficult.

Thank you for loving me
Rahama Feb 2021
Well, you got me again.
It's been a while since we rode together, old friend.
Although you've been there,
Stalking me in the shadows.
You thought I didn't notice your subtle signs,
The different costumes you wear,
The places that you hide.

But I do, and I did;
Every single time.
I was aware and wary,
But I guess not careful enough.
You got me this time,
But I promise this will be your last.
Can you guess what this poem's about?
Rahama Dec 2020
I know that I'm loved
But it's not so often that I feel so loved by those around me
I know that I'm loved
But there's just so many burdens and no one there to remind me
But today,
I knew it
I felt it
Something so tangible
I cried because of it
I laughed because of it
Long
Hard
It's like the whole year was set up for this day
Conveniently at the close of the year
Like a kind of mini-evaluation
That I gave my best when I could
I loved as hard as I should
I was there for people when it mattered
And my days were not time wasted on the flimsy distractions that life sets up for us.

Seeing those messages,
Despite the ardous task of replying them all
Didn't make me happy,
Oh no!
The word seems too simple
Too ephemeral to describe this
Seeing all those messages
Was like a reminder that I do matter
And the little things I do or say matters
That I'm loved for me, every version right till this moment
And every other version that follows till Christ comes
I'll stop here because this is getting too long
It's sounding more like a Taylor Swift song
Lol.

In all, I just wanted to thank you.
For being here, for knowing me
For showing love
I appreciate you❤️
Thank you again. I didn't read through this, I'll probably die cringing.
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