"rechecking" poems - Hello Poetry

Stuck in a ***** two-room apartment almost out of cigarettes , at one in the middle of a sweaty Chennai night, sobering up after two days, famished and restless dreaming of mid-night cigarette shops that never were, dreaming of alcohol (just enough to pass out), checking and rechecking the spent bottles and giving up in the end and settling to tolerate a night with myself, walking and babbling and writing and thinking and floating up on a great idea and circling back to the floor looking for cigarettes, just waiting for the shutters to lift, just waiting for this to end, just waiting. It was the best metaphor for life that I've ever known.

0

Aug 26, 2014

Aug 26, 2014 at 5:10 PM UTC

rayw1

Waiting

Stuck in a ***** two-room apartment almost out of cigarettes , at one in the middle of a sweaty Chennai night, sobering up after two days, famished and restless dreaming of mid-night cigarette shops that never were, dreaming of alcohol (just enough to pass out), checking and rechecking the spent bottles and giving up in the end and settling to tolerate a night with myself, walking and babbling and writing and thinking and floating up on a great idea and circling back to the floor looking for cigarettes, just waiting for the shutters to lift, just waiting for this to end, just waiting. It was the best metaphor for life that I've ever known.

27

Darkness has pressed up against our lattice windows. Classes start again in the morning. I’m being reabsorbed by college life. I’m a planner. I’ve been going over my syllabuses, repacking my bookbag, charging my power banks, checking and rechecking the assignments due tomorrow. After watching me prep for hours, Peter said, “You’re not going to the MOON.” Peter asked me last Friday, “Are you excited for Monday? (I’ll find out if I get my fellowship.) “I’m more excited about tonight,” I said, “I like going out on the town.” “Wow,” he said, “you’re so different - not like the other girls at all.” “No!” I said, laughing, “We’re stuck in a rut, we only go to one or two places, ever - if we go out at all. When people come to New Haven, I need places to take them - places besides pizza. At home, in Athens (Ga), I know twenty places - this is RESEARCH.” I assured him. Peter settled back into his doctorate-fraternity-house yesterday. Tonight (Sunday), there’s music in the suite, the crazy noises of people and the comfort of returned friends. All the roommates are back, greeted with hugs and kisses, as they dragged in their luggage. Lisa arrived with dinner, for 10, from Dominick's, in Manhattan. Spaghetti, salads, rolls, extra sauce - in six, small, suitcase-sized insulated bags. It was a logistical marvel. It’s only 90 minutes from Manhattan to the residence - we didn’t need to rewarm anything. “I KNOW we could have just eaten in the dining hall,” she said, shrugging, “call it zany - one last hurrah.” Everyone seemed happy to be back. There were travel stories, questions, and laughter. Oh, and Zeppole, little powdered sugar custard desserts that seemed the worst for travel. Everyone seemed to have an eye on the clock though. By 11pm the suite was quiet. Très unusual.

0

Mar 27, 2023

Mar 27, 2023 at 1:42 AM UTC

anaisvionet

The last supper

Darkness has pressed up against our lattice windows. Classes start again in the morning. I’m being reabsorbed by college life. I’m a planner. I’ve been going over my syllabuses, repacking my bookbag, charging my power banks, checking and rechecking the assignments due tomorrow. After watching me prep for hours, Peter said, “You’re not going to the MOON.” Peter asked me last Friday, “Are you excited for Monday? (I’ll find out if I get my fellowship.) “I’m more excited about tonight,” I said, “I like going out on the town.” “Wow,” he said, “you’re so different - not like the other girls at all.” “No!” I said, laughing, “We’re stuck in a rut, we only go to one or two places, ever - if we go out at all. When people come to New Haven, I need places to take them - places besides pizza. At home, in Athens (Ga), I know twenty places - this is RESEARCH.” I assured him. Peter settled back into his doctorate-fraternity-house yesterday. Tonight (Sunday), there’s music in the suite, the crazy noises of people and the comfort of returned friends. All the roommates are back, greeted with hugs and kisses, as they dragged in their luggage. Lisa arrived with dinner, for 10, from Dominick's, in Manhattan. Spaghetti, salads, rolls, extra sauce - in six, small, suitcase-sized insulated bags. It was a logistical marvel. It’s only 90 minutes from Manhattan to the residence - we didn’t need to rewarm anything. “I KNOW we could have just eaten in the dining hall,” she said, shrugging, “call it zany - one last hurrah.” Everyone seemed happy to be back. There were travel stories, questions, and laughter. Oh, and Zeppole, little powdered sugar custard desserts that seemed the worst for travel. Everyone seemed to have an eye on the clock though. By 11pm the suite was quiet. Très unusual.

8

"Hey" "Hi" "How was your day?" "I think I have a CRUSH on you" (Delete) "I LOVE you." (Sent) "I wish we could have this conversation face to face... typing... typing... typing..." "I am sorry" (Delete) "Goodnight" (Sent) "Goodbye" . . "You know seeing you smile makes me feel that I am the most fortunate person alive." (Delete) "You know your smile can bring world peace" (Sent) . . . . . "I keep hoping that you'll talk to me first" (Delete) "I can feel my lust grow, each time you utter hello" (Delete) "You know the first time we kissed. It was as if you were drowning and I was the air" (Delete) "Today my music player went bonkers, it played only those songs that you've sent me" (Delete) "It's been more than an year and I still miss you like I am missing a limb" (Delete) "I did not know that bones could ache, until I met you" (Delete) "Heyyyy! Itzz two am. And thees alcohol tastes like youu." (Delete) "I have never had so many long nights" (Delete) "You know I have started writing poems and most of them are about you. So that the love I have for you I can give it to the world. Because you won't take it from me" (Delete) "Strangers read my poems. They think you are a bad guy. But I keep defending you because you are not. I still love you, I guess. I definitely miss you. Do you?" (Delete) "How done with me are you?" (Delete) "I walk past your house so many times. Like a ninja, trying to catch a glimpse of your silhouette. You know I succeeded once!" (Delete) "I hate the fact that I can't hate you... not even at all" (Delete) "I keep scratching my skin. But, skin..... I can't even get you out of my soul." (Delete) "Why wasn't I enough?" (Delete) "It's funny. You are like a disease that long left me. But, I still get sicker each passing day." (Delete) "I keep rechecking our past texts exchanged. It helps me believe that you weren't fiction." (Delete) "I am not working anymore. I think you broke me" (Delete) "I see your face in every stranger I pass by. So, I've learnt walking with my head down." (Delete) "I knew you were broken. So was I. I wish we could have taken our pain together to create something beautiful. A painting of brokenness." (Delete) "You know they say you know yourself by meeting others. They say it right." (Delete) "I assume we were never in love, but, we could have been." (Delete) .. .. .. .. "Hey. Long time. I know you love Scarlett Johansson. Her new movie is out. Want to watch it with me?" (Sent) "Hey, Hope you are doing well?" (Sent) "I have started writing poems. You should check them out." (Sent) "It's been so long that I have seen you. I can hardly remember your face anymore." (Sent) "I dream about you constantly. I think I still love you" (Sent) "I miss you" (Sent) "Hey! I swear my cat did that" (Sent) SEEN

0

Sep 19, 2014

Sep 19, 2014 at 12:22 AM UTC

tanya-chaudhary

Don't Proof Read Your Feelings - Part 1

"Hey" "Hi" "How was your day?" "I think I have a CRUSH on you" (Delete) "I LOVE you." (Sent) "I wish we could have this conversation face to face... typing... typing... typing..." "I am sorry" (Delete) "Goodnight" (Sent) "Goodbye" . . "You know seeing you smile makes me feel that I am the most fortunate person alive." (Delete) "You know your smile can bring world peace" (Sent) . . . . . "I keep hoping that you'll talk to me first" (Delete) "I can feel my lust grow, each time you utter hello" (Delete) "You know the first time we kissed. It was as if you were drowning and I was the air" (Delete) "Today my music player went bonkers, it played only those songs that you've sent me" (Delete) "It's been more than an year and I still miss you like I am missing a limb" (Delete) "I did not know that bones could ache, until I met you" (Delete) "Heyyyy! Itzz two am. And thees alcohol tastes like youu." (Delete) "I have never had so many long nights" (Delete) "You know I have started writing poems and most of them are about you. So that the love I have for you I can give it to the world. Because you won't take it from me" (Delete) "Strangers read my poems. They think you are a bad guy. But I keep defending you because you are not. I still love you, I guess. I definitely miss you. Do you?" (Delete) "How done with me are you?" (Delete) "I walk past your house so many times. Like a ninja, trying to catch a glimpse of your silhouette. You know I succeeded once!" (Delete) "I hate the fact that I can't hate you... not even at all" (Delete) "I keep scratching my skin. But, skin..... I can't even get you out of my soul." (Delete) "Why wasn't I enough?" (Delete) "It's funny. You are like a disease that long left me. But, I still get sicker each passing day." (Delete) "I keep rechecking our past texts exchanged. It helps me believe that you weren't fiction." (Delete) "I am not working anymore. I think you broke me" (Delete) "I see your face in every stranger I pass by. So, I've learnt walking with my head down." (Delete) "I knew you were broken. So was I. I wish we could have taken our pain together to create something beautiful. A painting of brokenness." (Delete) "You know they say you know yourself by meeting others. They say it right." (Delete) "I assume we were never in love, but, we could have been." (Delete) .. .. .. .. "Hey. Long time. I know you love Scarlett Johansson. Her new movie is out. Want to watch it with me?" (Sent) "Hey, Hope you are doing well?" (Sent) "I have started writing poems. You should check them out." (Sent) "It's been so long that I have seen you. I can hardly remember your face anymore." (Sent) "I dream about you constantly. I think I still love you" (Sent) "I miss you" (Sent) "Hey! I swear my cat did that" (Sent) SEEN

55

OBSESSIVE COMPULSIVE DISORDER Seconds, minutes, hours and days go by I have to count every minute and don’t know why Cleaning, dusting, washing and planning All must be done or moving on is just not happening Routines and rituals are a daily task Why can’t I escape it I have to ask Things have to de done in a certain way Or, I am truly afraid things won’t be okay Checking and rechecking consume my day It’s difficult to keep my daily rituals at bay Things I own always have their proper place Or, I cannot relax in my very own space Doing things out of order will just not do Moving things slightly makes me crazy, too No matter how hard I try to refrain Actions are overridden by my own brain I am told this is one of my mechanisms to cope If I’m not careful, I will be hung by my own rope I can only take this one day at a time But, if I continue to work on it, I should be just fine.

0

Sep 27, 2013

Sep 27, 2013 at 2:34 AM UTC

tim-gronek

OCD

OBSESSIVE COMPULSIVE DISORDER Seconds, minutes, hours and days go by I have to count every minute and don’t know why Cleaning, dusting, washing and planning All must be done or moving on is just not happening Routines and rituals are a daily task Why can’t I escape it I have to ask Things have to de done in a certain way Or, I am truly afraid things won’t be okay Checking and rechecking consume my day It’s difficult to keep my daily rituals at bay Things I own always have their proper place Or, I cannot relax in my very own space Doing things out of order will just not do Moving things slightly makes me crazy, too No matter how hard I try to refrain Actions are overridden by my own brain I am told this is one of my mechanisms to cope If I’m not careful, I will be hung by my own rope I can only take this one day at a time But, if I continue to work on it, I should be just fine.

21

no matter how many times i've crossed these tracks nor how old i might now be i will still feel that childlike excitement building within as i look cautiously left then right and left then right again just to be sure before stepping across that first metallic line a symbol of both danger and adventure rechecking the signals as i cross the second i have never understood what those lights tell of the next train's progress red yellow green single or double flashing or constant no matter how clear the tracks appear the uncertainty of what might soon be unstoppably approaching always sets me on edge momentarily apprehensive yet exhilarated by each rushed step

0

Mar 19, 2024

Mar 19, 2024 at 3:35 PM UTC

MeanderingWords

before stepping across

no matter how many times i've crossed these tracks nor how old i might now be i will still feel that childlike excitement building within as i look cautiously left then right and left then right again just to be sure before stepping across that first metallic line a symbol of both danger and adventure rechecking the signals as i cross the second i have never understood what those lights tell of the next train's progress red yellow green single or double flashing or constant no matter how clear the tracks appear the uncertainty of what might soon be unstoppably approaching always sets me on edge momentarily apprehensive yet exhilarated by each rushed step

31

I’d spent months working on the vector-calculations, checking, verifying, rechecking, rechecking, rechecking in a circular-order, a daily ritual, infecting my mind with worry. Such things were important, so very critical for mission success. A careless subtraction, a meaningless missed-detail, one minor error in the numbers and my chances went up astronomically. The chances I would not make it back, not make it back to see all those nice things going on down on the surface. Strange, how your mind can play tricks on you up here, this lonely place where dreams are made & lost. I know she’ll be sorry when she finds out about my mistake, but things should have been better between us. Sadly, they weren’t.

0

Jan 3, 2014

Jan 3, 2014 at 11:16 AM UTC

jonny-angel

Spaceman Makes a Terrible Mistake

I’d spent months working on the vector-calculations, checking, verifying, rechecking, rechecking, rechecking in a circular-order, a daily ritual, infecting my mind with worry. Such things were important, so very critical for mission success. A careless subtraction, a meaningless missed-detail, one minor error in the numbers and my chances went up astronomically. The chances I would not make it back, not make it back to see all those nice things going on down on the surface. Strange, how your mind can play tricks on you up here, this lonely place where dreams are made & lost. I know she’ll be sorry when she finds out about my mistake, but things should have been better between us. Sadly, they weren’t.

20

Koozies keep the beer cold They keep your hand warm And your beer cold Which is nice When most thing are more complicated Or more intricately disappointing I find little to do Besides stare from one screen to the next And back and back again Rechecking the same websites The same hiss of the tab being popped Sitting in one room While thinking of many rooms None of it really makes any sense This inherited feeling of unease Wanting just to be close to you To actually kiss you Meaning it Having some feeling behind something Not wanting to rush from one thing to the next Just wanting to be stuck in that one moment with you Tasting your saliva Feeling your tongue, probing Like some rogue octopus tentacle There is nothing that fills the hollowness Like you You are the echoing clatter of pebbles Thrown down a dark ravine Replacing space with substance One haphazard toss After another

0

Jun 26, 2016

Jun 26, 2016 at 4:57 PM UTC

saintlebowitz

Soul Koozie

Koozies keep the beer cold They keep your hand warm And your beer cold Which is nice When most thing are more complicated Or more intricately disappointing I find little to do Besides stare from one screen to the next And back and back again Rechecking the same websites The same hiss of the tab being popped Sitting in one room While thinking of many rooms None of it really makes any sense This inherited feeling of unease Wanting just to be close to you To actually kiss you Meaning it Having some feeling behind something Not wanting to rush from one thing to the next Just wanting to be stuck in that one moment with you Tasting your saliva Feeling your tongue, probing Like some rogue octopus tentacle There is nothing that fills the hollowness Like you You are the echoing clatter of pebbles Thrown down a dark ravine Replacing space with substance One haphazard toss After another

31

looking out yonder,never really seeing to far, did you know there was one more It is no wonder, simply forgetting your own self worth is all part of the matter Carefully watching the steps of others,not for guidance but possibly something new to explore Becoming suspicious of our own character,rechecking boundary's seems to come faster Preponderance of potions poured in our lap forming a barrier guarding us from what we were before Seeking some fantasy, not blind but still limited ,will we ever become our own master Forgiveness a fantasy just for a good nights rest? grasping blindly for parts of the past to restore Hazy horizons,scattered views change like the news,adjusting by thinking faster Personal health now the most honest wealth, looking out ,not for what may have been before Simple wisdom from a compass,pointing to truth,acceptance your guide no longer needing a handler R.C.

0

Nov 2, 2016

Nov 2, 2016 at 6:40 AM UTC

wichitarick

OUT OF REACH

looking out yonder,never really seeing to far, did you know there was one more It is no wonder, simply forgetting your own self worth is all part of the matter Carefully watching the steps of others,not for guidance but possibly something new to explore Becoming suspicious of our own character,rechecking boundary's seems to come faster Preponderance of potions poured in our lap forming a barrier guarding us from what we were before Seeking some fantasy, not blind but still limited ,will we ever become our own master Forgiveness a fantasy just for a good nights rest? grasping blindly for parts of the past to restore Hazy horizons,scattered views change like the news,adjusting by thinking faster Personal health now the most honest wealth, looking out ,not for what may have been before Simple wisdom from a compass,pointing to truth,acceptance your guide no longer needing a handler R.C.

10