I heard the world's loudest **** today
It echoed round the town enough to say
"I am a **** of great renown and fame,
I am a **** who's worthy of the name
Of  KING of FARTS!"  Unthinkingly I sniffed
And, let me tell you, I have never whiffed
Aught so potent, dank and dread and foul
Blasted out from heaving human bowel
As that king of farts I smelled today
And which took my ******* breath away.

Who was the pumper of that putrid beauty?
How many curries in the line of duty
Had he consumed?  It must have been a man -
No pong so strong ere blew from female can.
Can no one answer yet my urgent question:
And say who suffereth such dire indigestion?
O heavens! his torment must be something chronic.
Can no one subsidise a high colonic
Irrigation to prevent another
Noisier and more noisome than its younger brother?

your eyes are like oysters i'd wish i would have gulped,
  a scenario of Narcissus who ate by the mirror...
     but then i listen to a heavy metal song:
and retract to change the lyrics
toward: fear of the selfies... fear of the selfie...
fear of the selfie... i have a phobia that someone
somewhere needs me to pose.
it's almost a cheerie cry, i'm a big boy i can walk
into a deathly hollowed-out road of
confiscated pride... the route i took,
engaged me with seven horses and one that almost
mistook my fingers for sugar cubes
and knocked my brains out after discovering
the plight of what it was nibbling on...
  but that's so ****** personal,
i might have insurrected the existence
of a satanic cult with me shouting
in the forest one time or other...
never mind that... your eyes are still akin
to oysters... a gulping-down of
whatever content it suggests...
no tongue-waggling, no breathing,
         just that shape akin to feline asiatic squirm
above a permanent slit: entangling with
what's known as sober-faced poker... or beyond
    purring: murmuring a sodden / well-trodden
path: and was anything else expected to suffer less?
   those eyes: esp. bound to a hispanic frozen lot of longing...
oysters jeopardised along with snails
  whenever the inquisition dared to come between us...
ergo dispersed the oily sexed up
***** Juan stereotypes of piston pump-pump...
nevermind, i call them twirling pumper-nickle gymnasts
of all things necessary kneaded into a chasm of org':
                         hispanic tilde eyes...
the eyebrow within the eye encompassing whatever
needs an expression... surprise? mmm, nada.
sunrise and was phone-*** so ever interesting as to
forget writing mistimed odes such as this?
                  thespian hoplites raised their tongues
toward the spear that suggested a marching was
the proper aversion toward a coup
with the director of theatre too violently itemising
Shakespeare toward a boorish scenario of
thrown rotten cabbage onto the stage.
        fewer hoplites suggested ******
  in the trojan horse, and fewer of the said "hashishin"
might have allowed history to bite at Homer's narrative
for posterity, had they not already said: ha ha! dope!
still, that locomotive tilde of the hispanic girl's eye
that ate the eyebrow, and squinted toward a sunrise
in demanding asiatic slit offense:
                           as monogamy for the sun invoking
marriage...
                    spinoza im eisen mädchen?
     hilfe anaconda! hilfe anaconda! hilfe aisha!
pricklengrund von hattin!
              hispanic tilde of the eye that ate the eyebrow
and demised the asiatic natural "squirm"
    and the forgotten sales of eyeglasses for myopia,
or too the once ticklish origin of silk with her
spinning don quixote's platonism to a
dame (akin to that fabled bride of Athos, good grief!)
that's dubbed *riza'doviento'dealma.

Aine, Xav and Ga, their dog,
Were hiking through the Sifton Bog
On Sunday morning, sunny and warming,
Hunting for their Easter eggs;                                                    
When Ga sniffed, then barked in a hollow log. 
What is it, Ga? Aine asked in wonder
Is it a frog? Xav asked Pumper.

But Ga smiled and left to lift a leg.

So Aine peeked in one end,
Xav peered in the other.
It was hollow, that's for sure,
They waved to one another.

Oh!... But Oh!... something moved inside.
Brown and hairy, with flaming red eyes.
It moved at Xav, who stepped back, then cried:

Aine, come here! Come here NOW!

Quick as a flash she stood by his side.

(Together they would live or die.)

With twelve powerful legs and six beady eyes,
It leapt at them, then hopped outside.
There cuddling ‘n twitching at Xavi's feet,
Were three wee bunnies, cute as can be.                              

Ooooo, Ooooo, they both sighed.
Can we take them home to feed and keep,
And play bunny games till we fall  asleep!
Xavi asked. No. Xavi begged!

Hmmm, thought Aine, quite perplexed;
But then remembered what her parents said:

Be cautious with our furry friends;
The birds, fish and earthy crawlers;
When you find them,
Be careful-kind,
And they'll be with us always.

Still,  Xavi worried, so he asked his Sis,

Are they okay if left like this?

Hmmm, thought Aine (who's getting real good at this).
Let's call Granda.
Tell him what we've seen.
Mom says he knows everything.

(They Zoom Time on Mom & Dad’s phones)

Hello, Granda, this is Aine.
Xav and I have a question for ya.
We came across some wee bunnies
Huddled in their home.
Are they okay if left alone?

Granda heard their concern,
So he told them all he had learned.

All the bunnies I have known,
Have done real well when they have grown.
I knew Buggs as a wee bunny,
And he grew up to marry Honey.

Rabbit's a friend to Kanga and Roo,
And Mr. Rabbit got carrots tricking Cap’n Kangaroo.

Miffy was Kathleen’s first rabbit friend;
Mark loved Velveteen’s happy end?

And Roger starred in his own movie,
Like me, your Granda, he's so cool and groovy.

Thumper keeps thumping his left hind foot,
And Br'er Rabbit’s still naughty in all his books.

The White Rabbit leads Alice down a hole,
Where March Hare’s late... as usual.
                      
If you like heroes found in comics,
Read Captain Carrot, he’s supersonic.
I can't forget Crusader Rabbit,
He rides a horse and feeds it carrots.    

I’m sure you've heard of Beatrix Potter’s
Tales of Peter, and his sisters and brothers.

All these rabbits were once wild bunnies,
Now in movies, books and funnies.

Why, even magicians pull rabbits out of hats.

Your three wee kittens were left alone
While Mummy Bunny left on her own
To gather food bits to feed her wee kits
Waiting for her safe return.
                    
I surely hope I’ve allayed all your fears,
Don't worry, your bunnies are here for years.

But there's one more bunny I should address,
And I'll tell you who so you needn't guess
This bunny's the one we might like best:

It's the Easter Bunny, au chocolat!!

Xav and Aine were much relieved
To let their bunnies
Live wild and free.

Thank you, Granda.
Hope to see you soon.
Happy Easter, and too-da-loo.

And off they hopped for some Easter treats,                    

Pumper got his treat back home.
Leftover from dinner-
A tofu hambone.

Vessel of blood, pumping life,
thrumming quickly to the world's pace.
Vessel of warmth, pumper of love,
squeezing every drop of red out.
Vessel of ice, pumping pain,
cold and lifeless while stabbing itself.
Vessel of stone, pumper of strength,
protecting against emotion's varied arrows.
Clumps of cholesterol, good or bad,
deflecting the flow of normality,
throwing off with simplicity,
so easy to fix but unnoticed,
seemingly not a problem at all,
until it seeps into your heart,
strangling it with its own agenda,
blocking and changing the beat,
the pulse,
until everything;
Stops.

Endorfiner pumper gennem mit blod for hvert
like post follow
Undskylder og gemmer min trang
like post follow
Wi-Fi er priotet No. 1

Impulsive depressive symptomer uden mit platoniske sociale netværk
Rastløs uden
Føler mig glemt når jeg ikke har været levende i flere dage

Tager  på lange trips
Behøver ikke politikens rejseguide
Verden er så nem og ligetil derinde

Har prøvet rehab
Holdte kun til de værste abstinenser gav mig wi-fi
Er jeg afhængig eller bare et produkt af min tid?

Fuglene flyver kun fordi de brændes nedefra.
Og vi er teenagetragedier der sucker for elendighed.
Vi griber efter pigtråden og blodet minder os om dig.
"Jeg smager af galakser" sagde du, men bed mig.
Vores hænder stiger febrilsk fra undergrundens hjertetåge.
Ingen ser og ingen rækker deres hånd i frygt for afhængighed.
For blå øjne er farlige.
Det var sådan et drag at se dig.
Dyrke aliensex i mørket med mine fjender,
drikke kaffe med mine dæmoner, og selv dér var du rødvinssmuk.
Vodkaen smager af ensomhed.
På jagt efter den perfekte choker . På perfekt
I mine endeløse flugt fra det ordinære. Måske man skulle passe ind?
Men separatismen sidder i mine kindben.
Autistisk-sukkende strømmer blodet i mine smerteknuste vener.
Søgende efter varme, men med et nul graders hjerte der kun pumper anakroniske ****, kan man ikke flyve.

Er jeg den eneste der ved at jorden er ved at gå under?
Begraver sig selv i undergang og drømmesvigt. Er jeg den eneste der ikke længere kan se sig selv i øjnene og leve -
Men jeg kan se stjerner og de skinner som bløde ferskner ikke gør det. Jeg ser mørke og opfinder selv patetiske solglimt. Vi længtes efter ægtheden og det hudløse, uden at vide hvad det er. Vi tør ikke mere.
At elske
at leve
at spise eller dø. Men vi har bløde ferskner og lange nætter der pumper vores hjerteblod af espresso shots.

Når du rammer min nethinde så pumper mit hjerte kraftigt blod ud fra min venstre hjertehalvdel til min højre, så jeg bliver helt varm i kroppen af al blodet der cirkulerer rundt i mine arterier, og der er nu ikke længere plads til H2O indeni, så det damper ud som sved i mine små håndflader og min krop bliver til noget jeg ikke kan holde styr på med kolesterol på speed og kolde tær og molekyler der danser ind i hinanden og årha, al den forelskede gør min krop helt udmattet og får mig til at smile som en vanvittig.

My pen have lost its will to bleed;
For the blood in my veins dries slowly as I give.
My papers began to rip as I live;
For the pumper in my chest slowly dies as I grieve.

My hands have lost its sense of touch;
For I forgot to perceive what I can hold and I cannot.
My tongue turned pale as it perpetually rots;
Unable to taste what sweet and sour— unable to determine what’s cold or hot.

My words may come out gibberish and censure;
For my eyes couldn’t see what else is unsure.
And as my mouth speak the words of cure;
A sacrifice must be done— just take my breath and let me wither under the sun.

nogle gange glemmer mit hjerte at slå
når tiden pludselig står meget stille
jeg ligner mest af alt et spøgelse
der lister rundt på glasskår af knuste ***** flasker
mens livet langsomt bliver suget ud af min tomme blege krop
men der findes også dage som suser forbi hvor
mit hjerte pumper dobbelt så meget blod ud som det burde
til mine blå vener er ved at sprænges
og jeg kan mærke at det banker helt oppe i halsen
mit hjerte banker for dig
og når du forlader mig
så er der ikke længere noget at banke for
det vil aldrig være besværet nok at arbejde så hårdt
blot for at holde mig i live
så hver gang du forlader mig dør jeg en lille smule

I've been neutered,
Drill a hole in my head,
To relieve some of this,
This place,
Where I've lost it,
Everything that once made sense,
Totally disarray,
Isolation,
Meaningless prose to try and,
Alleviate

O sweet, depressed loneliness,
How you mock,
On the verge of tears,
Pumper keeps pumping,
Make sense please!
I beg you to help me.

Lonesome, sinking,
I try to think of something else,
But I just get turned around,
O the hatred I feel,
The burning hole where,
Desire was,
Where,
False happiness was,
I pine for it now,
Ignorant Bliss.

Take me away from all this,
In the impossible way,
Tell me everything’s going to be okay,
When the world comes unraveled,
Striking  keys in shabby manner,
Looking for that temporary relief,
That wasn't found.

A neighbors' barn caught fire
last night, full of newly bailed
hay, lit up the sky with yellow
glow and black smoke,
Many of us came running but
could do little but watch, it was
not a blaze controlled by a well
and a garden hose.

With a twenty minute response
time by our rural volunteer fire
department, having not enough
water in their two pumper trucks
to do much good, it burned for
hours and was a total loss.

In the morning after most everyone
had gone my stoic friend, a man
of 60 years and few words wept,
he had lost his tractor and his beloved
border collie herding dog in the flames,
Molly obviously not able or willing to
abandon her seven newly born pups.

He said, the barn, hay, even the tractor he
could replace, but "never my wonderful
sweet Molly girl."