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What happened to the child,
the one that smiled all the time?
What happened to the boy,
that made the sun shine?

I don't know why I feel,
the way I seem to.
Buried in my grave, alive,
don't know what to do.

I've spent years and years,
listening to doctors say I'll be fine.
But that doesn't really mean,
I'm alright.

If I believe in the doctors,
swallow all the pills they say,
will there ever come a day,
I finally feel okay?

I wish I was taller,
stronger,
faster,
smarter.
My heart hurts,
I'm emotionally unstable,
don't sit across a table,
or a room,
and tell me about my mind.
Don't sit there and tell me,
I'll be fine.

I'm afraid of myself,
of being alone,
I have no home.

I fear the disease,
it eats at me,
and I can't stop it.

But if I keep a smile on my face,
if I wake up to a new day,
that's good enough for me,
that gives me a little faith.
Copyright Barry Pietrantonio
Sometimes I wonder,
how much longer I have left.
I want to know how many years,
so I can make them my best.
No one knows their timeline,
but I want mine.

But if I never find out,
how much longer I'm alive,
I guess that's okay with me,
it's better a surprise.
I'll take each day with a smile,
cause that's all I can do,
and so can you.
Copyright Barry Pietrantonio
When someone says
"You've changed"
with a negative tone,
it simply means
you've ceased to live
the way they wish.
 Jan 2015 Kaila Martin
Parnini
Put your head on my lap
Let me sing you a lullaby.
You've been awake through some nights
But there was a girl who went through few more
And in those moment you let your tears drop
She wrote herself a song.

I know you're broken,
I know you're sad,
But it will be over before you know;
Life's not about the crests, there will be troughs
Like a musical note.

It's dark now,
There's no one with you,
But at the end of the day we're all alone;
Be your own best friend, why do you pretend?
That we don't die alone.

Those teardrops on cheeks,
Glisten like pearl beads,
But the thing you're crying for doesn't deserve it;
You're worth more, than you know
So you might as well listen to me tell you how.

We've fallen, but we'll get back up,
Our failures don't define us.
We're broken, but we will heal
Else carry scars on our back with pride.
They can hit us once, not more than twice
We are not weak, just polite.
We'll fight for what's ours, not smile when we're dark inside,
We have hung enough of us for sacrifice.
And those double faced friends, relationships with dead ends,
Say them goodbye and make it end.

Just keep smiling, Sweetheart
You're better than your past,
There's more to life than war.
So don't give up!
If not today, tomorrow is ours,
If not better we're less worse.


2am,
I've got to go,
I'll visit you again, when you're alone
If not sweet dreams, may a sweet life wake you up
Sleep well, my love.
There are a lot of diseases and there are a lot of medicines being made for them. But there is one disease that has no cure made for it yet and is affects people widely - Broken heart. I have met many people in my life who are either sad, broken or depressed. The reasons are varied but they share one thing - pain, helplessness, loneliness. This one's for all of those broken people out there - Stay strong, someone loves you and if not, I do *hugs*
 Jan 2015 Kaila Martin
Kevin
She was the only girl I was able to be myself around. She listened to my stories, laughed at my jokes, cuddled with me when I was sad and made me smile when I couldn’t. I was completely in love with her. We spoke of marriage, children and growing old together. It was the perfect picture. I honestly thought I had found the one for me; my perfect match. I thought we were forever.
I was wrong.

In the blink of an eye, she was gone. She left me for another, better man. As every person would be, I was devastated. I tried everything to get the love of my life back, in vain. Nothing I said or did was going to change the fact that her feelings have shifted to another.

Before I could even understand the whole situation, the pain of my loss hit me. My feelings were everywhere. It started with tears in the shower, sleepless nights, alcohol and my chest caving in every time I heard her name. I’ve woken up to tear-soaked pillows, caused by nightmares so many times. I’ve pushed away friends and family, because I was so afraid to love anyone any more.

Then suddenly, it all stopped. No tears, anger or pain and no happiness. I became a mirror: blank when nobody was around and showing everyone smiles, laughter and joy; just what they wanted to see. Only I knew that none of it was real.
In cadence they begin to sing
Fearing deadly fate
A chorus of "no"s and "please"s
My brain refuses to wake me
At least this time it's only a dream

In my brain again are their voices
They reverberate
The screams themselves repeat
Not a lesser volume than that of
Agony, remorse, dread, hate
I'm not going to tell you there is no God.
But, I AM going to let you in on a little secret.
God believes in the faithful.
God stopped believing in me,
the exact moment I stopped believing in him.
I was 6 years old.
Nobody told me much about God.
just to pray every night
and thank him for what you have got.
I called out for him to make it okay again,
and he returned my calls with silence and dialtones.
I wish I knew then
what I know now.
God is not a wish granting factory.
I wish someone had told me sooner
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