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 Feb 2018 hannah
Masako
If it were to only rest upon my hands and breathe through my life..
to posses what others view when they smile fondly on their past
instead..
I feel velvet scars rising
forming into reminders;
my dreams slept were only nightmares
my dreams awake were only mirrors to night
the only one to hold me was my dead teddy bear
cold, stale, mildewed from my tears
suicide preached upon, with words of parents
A happy childhood is all I asked for..
 Feb 2018 hannah
Melodie Fowles
I'm not a saint
I must confess
When I'm done I hope of me
You won't think any less

It started when I was 19 years old
When I decided It would be fun
To swing on a strippers pole

Now it was fun
I'll admit that's a fact
But the happiness I portrayed
Was all just an act

Next on the wheel of disaster
Alcohol was the the slave
I sought to master
In the end I found
It was not the answer

Along came the drugs 1.. 2.. 3.. 4
I tried them all
And maybe a few more
But I just ended up lying
In a pool of blood on the floor

All my friends
And family I left behind
Just so I could lose myself
In my own mind
After a while the way I was living
Lost it's shine
And eventually
I had to draw the line

So from the dark
Drug filled place
I found a brighter
Cleaner head space

One where everything wasn't wrong
And where I truly felt I belong

Now I live a life
That is clean and pure
Cause from that mess
I found the cure
She is cute and sweet
It is her I adore
She gave me a reason to live for.
 Feb 2018 hannah
Charles Bukowski
little dark girl with
kind eyes
when it comes time to
use the knife
I won't flinch and
i won't blame
you,
as I drive along the shore alone
as the palms wave,
the ugly heavy palms,
as the living does not arrive
as the dead do not leave,
i won't blame you,
instead
i will remember the kisses
our lips raw with love
and how you gave me
everything you had
and how I
offered you what was left of
me,
and I will remember your small room
the feel of you
the light in the window
your records
your books
our morning coffee
our noons our nights
our bodies spilled together
sleeping
the tiny flowing currents
immediate and forever
your leg my leg
your arm my arm
your smile and the warmth
of you
who made me laugh
again.
little dark girl with kind eyes
you have no
knife. the knife is
mine and i won't use it
yet.
 Feb 2018 hannah
CW
Riverside
 Feb 2018 hannah
CW
Home is not a person
You cannot seek out a place to stay in a heart
Home is not where you’re from
Home is not where you’ve been
The house that has built you will be gone
The roof will collapse and the windows will shatter
Home does not exist
You are where you are
You go where you go
Your home is what is inside of you
Not a city
But there is comfort in driving down Brockton into the woods
 Feb 2018 hannah
Lani Foronda
I'm starting to
find that there
is bittersweet
relief in letting
go of the things
that i had so
desperately clung
to because maybe-
just maybe- I never
really needed them
in the first place.
I'm beginning to
understand that there
was and always
has been
something
between us. And I
suppose we didn't
want to admit that
what we had was
the one thing
we both knew we
never would need.
September 19, 2014

— The End —