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They never noticed
when she stopped waving back—
how her laughter faded
like music from a passing car,
how her shoes stayed clean
for weeks.

once, she chased rain
to the edge of the river,
barefoot, out of breath,
her shadow chasing behind.
they called her wild—
too alive to sit still.

but stillness came.
not with a scream,
just silence,
growing louder by the day.

no one asked
why her side of the bed
was always made.
why she didn’t hum anymore.
as long as she smiled
and passed her tests,
they assumed she was fine.

when they looked for her,
the water led the way—
not the current,
but the quiet reflection
she once stared into
a little too long.

when they found her,
she looked almost asleep.
hair spread out like grass,
hands still.
no bruises—
at least,
not the kind they talk about.

maybe
she just wanted to know
what peace feels like
underneath it all
Addiction sneaks in like an unwanted guest,
“Just one more,” it says, while I fail the test.
My snacks disappear, my shows pile high,
My phone rings a lot—do I even reply?

I swear I’ll quit… tomorrow, maybe tonight,
But it giggles and hides just out of sight.
It’s coffee at dawn, it’s scrolling till two,
It laughs at the promises I never keep true.
A messy old friend, both bitter and sweet,
Addiction’s the guest who won’t take defeat.
They raise their voice—
sharp as thunder breaking morning.
I sigh, roll my eyes,
but later find dinner kept warm,
a blanket folded at the foot of my bed,
the porch light left on.

School drains me—
assignments stack like bricks.
But my backpack holds books,
my teachers call me by name,
someone saves a chair for me.

Sometimes I ache
from being the one who always understands.
But my playlist still knows the lyrics
that hold me together.

And in the quiet,
I see the love that never left.
He couldn’t even finish a bowl of sorbet—he said it was “too sweet” for him.

Little did he know—he was too sweet for the cruel world he was born into.
I have a friend who just radiates so much positivity and I wonder what the world would be like if everyone was like this.
Palm trees and mountains occupy my mind.

You are all palm trees,
neatly lined up in a row,
swaying together,
adapting when needed.

I am a mountain,
plastered against the sky,
only noticed from afar,
an unchangeable monument.

I observe the palm trees swaying in perfect unison,
and know I’ll forever be a distant sight.
I wanted to compare how out-of-place I feel in social situations with the palm tree and mountainscapes I love to observe where I live :)
I get us each one more scoop of ice cream.
You’re full but try to eat it anyway.

It’s things like this I’ll miss,
you shoveling in food simply because
it’s the last thing we’ll eat together.

As I’m shutting the car door,
my mind screams for me to stop.

I scoop out the thought and leave it on the pavement—
along with my fears that you won’t come back.

All I can do now is trust that God will protect you,
as my heart is scooped, clean out of my chest.
Another poem about my best friend, 2 years will fly by... right?
3 years in the making:

3 years you’ve cared for me
I hope I did the same for you

3 years you made me laugh
With our dumb jokes and antics

3 years I’ve thought of you
When seeing cottage cheese clouds

3 years I’ve called you
When I had something important to say, good or bad

3 years you made amazing
Simply with your presence

3 years you’ve tried to pay for me
And I’ve stubbornly refused

3 years I’ve watched you
Grow up into a man

3 years you showed me
What the love of God looks like, unconditional and unfailing

3 years of goofy photos
That I will never delete

3 years that you and I have made millions of mistakes
And I wouldn’t change a single one

Because my favorite moments comprise those 3 years

And I would wait another 3 for just 1 more
My best friend of 3 years is leaving to share the love of God in another state, I couldn't be more proud
You spent so much time preserving your youth that you forgot to use it.
I wrote this thought down years ago and thought I'd publish it today. :)
The future worries me:
all of the unknown possibilities.
Indecision overcomes my mind,
at the time I most need it precise.

I even cried tonight,
looking at a list of courses:
mystifying options that I may not have
if I can’t write the essay right
or get the shiniest recommendations.

So I am worrisome,
for the next month and year.

I am worrisome because I want nothing more
than to be part of that place,
and to belong among those people.
I have to start applying to universities and this is how I feel about that in this moment.
He remembered a detail—
just one.

And somehow that was enough…

to make up for everything he forgot.
You can spend your time listening to and remembering things about someone but there is no guarantee they will do the same for you.
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