just about eye height

the second board from the left of the splintered shelf in the shed
and its just about why i

stand beside the wasps nest in calm sweat like palms melt somewhere in my pockets
but its more about the time by

which i find a trowel on the wall beside the power that ive always needed to decide to recall
because its really when my mind dies

that i find that such denial can be freeing although always seeming fleeting
and thats the moment with my eyes wide

stuck inside the shed

at the bus stop with a juice box
and a heart full of love.
on the pavement an arrangement
of impersonal hugs.
how i miss you when im with you
and what it used to be like.
over blue ice saying white lies
ill be quiet tonight.

I have had to dig my heart deep
with the shovel of your cruelty
buried our memories with stifled weeps
and in that,still, I find a kind of beauty

Some say I'm a slave to love, to others I'm only a fool
Neither know to have loved alone is a rare gift
For my heart is an engine and love is its fuel
with my feet on the ground, not hovering nor adrift.

It is with grief now that I bid you farewell
but who says in that there is no charm?
Our times together now in another time dwell.
A time that can cause none any more harm

He’s been going through these phases.
Because everyday he lives his mind changes, rearranges.
Swear it’s just like a seed,
oh yes it’s growing indeed.
But unlike Adam and Eve,
he keeps the fruits on the trees, sheesh.

His mind’s been neglected for a minute,
started reading all these books and yet that still ain’t fix it.
Trying to figure out the world, the universe and the pearls.
All the beauty in the matrix can be found in a girl, or a diamond.
The stars and constellations of Orion,
yes it does get deeper think we need a little silence.

Phases.

Swear he’s been going through these phases,
because everyday he lives his mind needs homeostasis and patience.
I think he needs it for his phases,
each year I age it’s like I grow a couple faces, replacements.

For all the egos he was raised with,
with mad foundations Neanderthals couldn’t “cave in”.

“cave in”.
“cave in”.

Aspire to respire
Find a frame from deep beneath
Calm the calling to concede
Push beyond lessons learnt
Grown in ways
which blood can't reach
Silent whispers in rhythmic beat

there's no one quite like it
the voice in your head
it tells you you're pretty
than tells you you're dead
there for you in silence
there for all the pain
it picks up the pieces
it cut out of your brain

Sea of rubber, storm of rock
Ponder endless, mudslide thoughts
Never,
      never,
           never        
stops
    Until I
cannot see

Batter, torment, carry, pour
Solid things are shifting shores
    Until
I cannot hear

Sighs are monsters, out from under
Mud is made of every mutter
Thunder fades into more thunder
    Avalanche demands

All of what you thought was peace
deserts to deserts underseas
the grains of sand
climb past  your knees

    and now i cannot think

I used to hide from walls of rock
  or shrink into a corner;
    
    at least
cement
    is solid set

Don't you think we'd be better off,
Just tryin' to tie it all up in a knot,

Can't you find a better way,
If you got a word or two that you need to say?

Yeah I don't think,
It's healthy,
To be stuck,
So please tell me,

The answer,
To our problem,
Is to not fall,
To the bottom.