The floor beneath me is melting like a painting left in the rain
The more I try to claw my way back to consciousness
The more I drift away from reality
The deeper I sink into the place of distorted horror
Where static shapes are able to twist and turn
Ears are able to see and smell
Brains are scrambled and tangled
Words are formed but cannot be spoken
Thoughts are burgeoned but cannot be controlled
The venomous voices have all the power
Dare not to feed them with positivity
In darkness they are determined to rule

27/03/2019

Late at night or in the middle of the day,
voices sneak inside this *******-e-d up brain.
They yell and scream till my mind is tore,
making me think, there, is, no, more.

26/03/2019

I am having a crisis,
But you cannot respond,
We wonder why I'm like this
Why was I ever born?

Being under psychosis,
But you won't acknowledge
So I tell you somethings
Overreact, astonished

Calm down, there's nothing
There is nothing to fear
For you, I'll change my perceptions
It's alright, I don't need prescriptions

I know it's set in stone
The future's always your way
So I should stop making up all these things
For the fun of it, for play

I know, you're a human,
I know, it makes you scared,
Seeing all the work you put into me
With an eye blink disappear

Because you're human,
I exist to be your slave
Your word is how I should go
Since you say so, I should behave

3...  2... 1...
My blade pierces my skin like the shriek pierced the silence of existence on a midnight walk in which I never returned.

3...  2... 1...
My finger slides against the back of my throat in such a way as to release all of my guilt from my stomach from a day of carelessness and lack of willpower.

3...  2... 1...
I jump from the bridge similar to the way a fledgling dives from the sky for the first time, not graceful, but still coordinated enough to be considered  beautiful to those with a particular type of mind.

3...  2... 1...
My consciousness disappears in a single heartbeat, with a puff of smoke disbursing, like a drop of dew evaporating, a child's laugh ending, a life falling apart, I'm a candle being blown out.

3...  2... 1...
I am free.

Yes but you are merely
A glass of water to an ocean
That's already full
And doesn't need your help
And I am the carrier of viruses
And mindfulness
That spread like a rumor
In a schoolgirl clique
These voices growing louder
As I give in to them
And create new characters that
Tell me just to do it
Like CB
They tell me
In my head
Just do it
And I shiver and growl
Cause once you go insane
There is no coming down