#parody poems on Hello Poetry

Brent Kincaid Nov 2017

HEY ****** ****** 2017

Hey ****** ******,
Some stars gotta fiddle
Just like a Catholic priest.
We have to give them credit,
God saved them when they did it.
And blessed them at the least.

Hey ****** ******
Fat Trump has to fiddle
With women he can control.
He pretends he doesn’t know
What that word simply shows
Since the last syllable is troll.

Hey ****** ******
A high powered fiddle
Is always powered by cash.
But, Mr. Diddler
Unlike a talented fiddler
You are nothing but overpaid trash.

Hey ****** diddledick
We all hope your fiddlestick
Falls off and lays on the ground
Then you could stop it
And the women could stomp it.
And kick your skanky *** around.

#scrotus #nursery #rhyme #parody #political #poetry #kincaid

Cliff Green Oct 2017

In an Apple with the metros (apologies to Ezra Pound)

The close trimmed whiskers on these faces in the crowd;
ivy on Jay Gatsby's wall.

A parody arising from a trip to the Apple store.

#parody #apple #technology

Joe Thompson Sep 2017

Gospel of Ignorance

Numerous were the people that did turn away from the Truth
and worshipped Ignorance
Saying “Oh, lead us in the ways of true Ignorance,
for the truth we love not.”

Then they were sent forth to find the truth
and destroy it.
And their God did say unto them:
Where truth grows in abundance –
plant lies, so that there is confusion.

Where truth stands as a monument,
chip it away.
Where truth sounds forth like music,
Blare your falsehoods louder.

Where the truth shines brightly
obscure it with shadows.

Deny the obvious.
Eschew all reason, logic and evidence
that does not please you.
Above all else repeat the lies
and repeat the lies
and repeat the lies
and repeat the lies
ad infinitum
These are the ways of true Ignorance.

#political #ignorance #parody #fox #news

Brent Kincaid Sep 2017

PRE-OP PASTICHE

Nothing could be finer
Than to have a real ******
In my britches.
I’m changing what I’ve got
Don’t tell me I am not
All you *******.

Some don’t think my gender is my place to decide
They don’t know that I’m a woman inside.

Nothing could be finer
Than to have a real ******
In my britches.

Nothing could be better
Than to change my gender letter:
Make it legal.
All will call me miss
Or give my *** a kiss
And make it regal.

I have been a girl inside my whole entire life.
Now, if i want, I can be a wife.

Nothing could be better
Than to change my gender letter:
Make it legal!

I don’t tell the homophobes just how they should be.
They all need to do the same thing with me.

Nothing would be sweeter
If I never had this peter
To confuse things.
How happy I will be
With that serenity
That a cooze brings.

You may doubt the logic here, but I’m here to say.
Trust me when I tell you I’ll be happy that way.

Nothing could be finer
Than to have a real ******
In my britches.

This is NOT autobiographical but is a bit of fun for some of my Friends over the years.

#parody #transgendered #humor #poetry #kincaid

KRRW Aug 2017

I'm A Disney Princess

I'm a Disney princess
A pretty, pretty actress
Sought by handsome princes
and by ugly wicked witches

My hair is blonde
and shiny and smooth
or soft and long
and fragrant and strong

I'm just like my hair
Shining bright like a flare
In a world of unfair
I'd get even and square

(Grr, grr!)

'Cause I'm a Disney princess
My skin is white and lovely
So are my eyes and my teeth
And everything about me

Because I am perfect
I'm created to win
I'm the hero of your dreams
Armed with my tears and high-pitched screams

Sometimes I'd only sleep
Then there comes his charming kiss
It's hot, it's sweet, it's salty
Thanks for waking me up!

Sometimes I'd sneak on a ball
Dancing 'til I hear my midnight call
And leave one of my silver slippers
For my curious prince to ponder
Then he'd seek and find me
And we'll live happily ever after!

Wait, why am I here
In this sad forgotten tower?
With my evergrowing golden hair
Can't even find a single stair

I wanna go down
I wanna go down so badly
I wanna go down so deeply
Somebody please help me
Please help me go down

And my wish is granted:
A prince had just appeared
He pulled down my slender hair
Saved me from my lonely despair
But “ouch! That hurts!”
No it didn't! I'm just trying to flirt!

(Wink, wink!)

'Cause I'm a Disney princess
I can have all that I want
I can make all those mistakes
And fix them with a magical wand!

My life is a dazzling fairy tale
Packed with curses and magic spells
Who really cares about moral lessons
If everyone's happy like a bunch of morons?

Because I'm a Disney princess!
Everybody loves me
Whatever I do
You still wanna be me!

Curtain closes,
bells go chimes
My story ain't over,
it's just begun
Countdown starts,
five times the fun
Four times the thrill,
the Evil Queen awakes
Thrice made the chill,
the dragon is unleashed
Twice turn the pages,
here come the mages
Once upon a time,
I'm a Disney princess!

Written
31 July 2016

Copyright
© Khayri R.R. Woulfe. All rights reserved.

#parody #satire #mockery #disney #princess #teenage #fairytale #disneyland #theater #exaggeration

Zeeshan Aug 2017

Gloss of Love

the love he needed,
the gloss of success he craved,
it was nothing but a masquerade…

blinded by the laminated desires,
of the mockery camouflaged as love,
he fell for a complete charade.

foolish he was to believe the travesty,
that brought upon endless misery,
he craved the love all too glossy to be real.

mockery or parody, perhaps,
he was a *******,
fell in love with misery.

#masquerade #camouflaged #love #travesty #misery #gloss #glossy #mockery #parody #laminated

Brent Kincaid Jul 2017

MGHTY MOUTH

Our reputation never had a chance
Since the fat boy did his dance.
Here he is to ruin the land!
Mighty Mouth's underhand!
He has never had a single clue
Not a thought for me or you.

He stays surrounded by some total jerks
Who always nod “okay”
No matter what he says he wants to do
No matter what he’ll say.

We should be shivering in our bikinis
He’s nothing but a modern Mussolini.

Yessir, everything he does is for cash
And his family is a bunch of trash.
Our country will be great again
But not if Mighty Mouth stays in.

#humor #parody #trump #cartoons #politics #poetry #kincaid

Cam Mar 2017

Sonnet 43 (How do you dislike me?)

How do you dislike me? Let me count the ways.
At least half of what I do and half of what I say
Seems to irritate and frustrate you.
My deeds mistrusted and misunderstood
As something other than selfless good.
Your suspicion steals a narrow view
Of how I would prefer to spend my time.
So the sentence precedes the crime
And love is shackled in its gaol,
A prisoner with no parole,
Once found guilty, condemned for all,
And nothing can now avail.
Imagined crimes will never fade
And penance be ne’er truly paid.

#love #trust #sonnet #relationship #parody #elizabethbrowning