(Inspired by This Is the House That Jack Built)

Crack House

This is the house that police raided.
This is the needle
That lay in the house that police raided.
This is the wimp,
That injected the needle
That lay in the house that police raided.

This is the ****,
That bought the wimp,
That injected the needle
That lay in the house that police raided.

This is the cop,
That alarmed the ****,
That bought the wimp,
That injected the needle
That lay in the house that police raided.

This is the dealer with the street popcorn,
That distracted the cop,
That alarmed the ****,
That bought the wimp,
That injected the needle
That lay in the house that police raided.

This is the pervert stocked with ****,
That bought from the dealer with the street popcorn,
That distracted the cop,
That alarmed the ****,
That bought the wimp,
That injected the needle
That lay in the house that police raided.

This is the baby recently born,
That annoyed the pervert stocked with ****,
That bought from the dealer with the street popcorn,
That distracted the cop,
That alarmed the ****,
That bought the wimp,
That injected the needle
That lay in the house that police raided.

This is the gang armed with scorn,
That kidnapped the baby recently born,
That annoyed the pervert stocked with ****,
That bought from the dealer with the street popcorn,
That distracted the cop,
That alarmed the ****,
That bought the wimp,
That injected the needle
That lay in the house that police raided.

This is the homeless man that begged at morn,
That waked the gang armed with scorn,
That kidnapped the baby recently born,
That annoyed the pervert stocked with ****,
That bought from the dealer with the street popcorn,
That distracted the cop,
That alarmed the ****,
That bought the wimp,
That injected the needle
That lay in the house that police raided.

This is the panhandler all forlorn,
That supported the homeless man that begged at morn,
That waked the gang armed with scorn,
That kidnapped the baby recently born,
That annoyed the pervert stocked with ****,
That bought from the dealer with the street popcorn,
That distracted the cop,
That alarmed the ****,
That bought the wimp,
That injected the needle
That lay in the house that police raided.

This is the cardboard sign and clothes all torn,
That belonged to the panhandler all forlorn,
That supported the man that begged at morn,
That waked the gang armed with scorn,
That kidnapped the baby recently born,
That annoyed the pervert stocked with ****,
That bought from the dealer with the street popcorn,
That distracted the cop,
That alarmed the ****,
That bought the wimp,
That injected the needle
That lay in the house that police raided.

All cash must flow in only one direction.
All  must go to those who have a lot.
Alll POTUS tweets are used as misdirection
In Blame-a-lot!
The cabinet must all be legal morons
So they don’t see what POTUS has wrought.
Then they cannot be blamed for what goes on
In Blame-a-lot!

Blame-a-lot! Blame-a-lot.
It’s really much more than bizarre.
But in Blame-a-lot; Blame-a-lot!
That’s how conditions are.
In short there’s simply not
A much more likely spot
For shame and true chicanery
Than here in
Blame-a-lot!

The Devil went down to Georgia,
He knew right where he wanted to go,
He’d built a golf course down in Hades, and
He needed a Head Pro.
So he snuck in to Augusta,
Up to the practice tee,
A guy was hittin’ range ***** there
Just as far as you could see.
The Devil said, “Hey Mister,
You want to have a game?
I bet that I can beat you, and
I don’t even know your name.”
The guy said, “My name’s Johnny,
But they call me ‘Long John’
Never met a bet or bottle
That I would back down on.
Guess you could say that some of them
Might have been mistakes,
But, Hell, this life’s for livin’,
So Devil, what’s the stakes?”
The Devil smiled, and said, “Hey, John,
Looks like you’re pretty good,
But that driver you are pounding
Is an old one made of wood,
So if you win, you get this golden driver you can sell,
But if you lose I take your sorry *** straight down to Hell.”

Johnny swing your driver hard,
The Devil’s here in town,
You have a bet you might regret,
But there’s no backin’ down,
If you win, you get a golden driver you can sell,
But if you lose you’re gonna be a golf pro down in Hell!

So they threw a tee up in the air,
It pointed straight at John,
He said, “I guess that means I’m up”,
And the Devil said, “Game on!”
Long John teed his ball up, then asked,
“So, Devil, what’s the game?  
We playing match or medal?
To me it’s all the same.”
By now a crowd had gathered ‘round, and
They all held their breath,
So everyone was quiet when,
The Devil hissed, “Sudden Death;
First one of us to win a hole,
Wins the bet as well,
Better save the ice from your last drink,
Cuz, it’s mighty hot in Hell!”
Long John said, “That’s fine with me,
We got the stakes, we got the bet”,
Then he pulled his driver from the bag, and
Lit a cigarette,
He hit a rocket down the fairway
With a mighty long John swing,
Blew some smoke the Devil’s way,
And said, “Just one more thing,
I’ve won a bunch of money, and I’ve lost a bunch as well,
If I should lose to you today we’ll have a rematch down in Hell.”

Johnny swing your driver hard,
The Devil’s here in town,
You have a bet you might regret,
But there’s no backin’ down,
If you win, you get a golden driver you can sell,
But if you lose you’re gonna be a golf pro down in Hell!

The Devil looked amused and asked,
“Is that all you got?”
Took a six iron from his golf bag
And matched John’s giant shot.
“You have a disadvantage, John,
‘Cuz you play by the rules,
Bettin’ with the Devil
Is a game for mortal fools
I have a few tricks in my bag,
I’ll use’em if need be.
And Long John, on that first par four,
I think we both made three.”
On the next hole, John said, “You go first,
I’m gonna have a smoke”,
Took a bottle from his golf bag,
Mixed a Jack and Coke,
The Devil took his magic six, hit his ball
Right towards a tree; It bounced left,
Skipped across a stream, and
Landed on the green.
Long John watched with interest,
But he didn’t seem concerned,
Said, “If you play with matches,
You’re liable to get burned.”
He hit his old wood driver, 300 yards and watched it role,
Down the fairway, right onto the green, and straight into the hole!

Johnny swing your driver hard,
The Devil’s here in town,
You have a bet you might regret,
But there’s no backin’ down,
If you win, you get a golden driver you can sell,
But if you lose you’re gonna be a golf pro down in Hell!

The Devil handed John the driver,
‘Cuz he knew that he’d been beat,
And John said, “Man I’m hungry,
Let’s grab a bite to eat.
There’s a steak place down the road,
Not too far from here,
You look like you could use a drink,
So I’ll buy you a beer!
You hit that six iron pretty well,
I’ll give you a hand,
But I told you once you *******,
This is Long John Land!”

Johnny swing your driver hard,
The Devil’s here in town,
You have a bet you might regret,
But there’s no backin’ down,
If you win, you get a golden driver you can sell,
But if you lose you’re gonna be a golf pro down in Hell!

How many ****** Valentine's poems will I
be forced to endure -
young love
lost love
ill-begotten love -
likened to that of a blooming red rose
thorns and all -
"Oh! my passion burns bright
like the flames in my *****!"

Much too cliche, I think
as I sit down to write my own
and sign it
"Yours Always".

I pass my heart into the nebula  
Expectant --- but of what?
The password is too easily guessed.
Afraid, I clutch my hands

Does the traveler have the privilege of entry?
Does the bee have sojourn
In the inn of the flower?

I ask.

Can I just forget this year
That started off so fine
I just hope that by next year
I'll have a better time

With all the fighting on the news
In Damascan streets
Makes me wonder how we can
Reject the survivors we meet

Between Brexit and the election
We keep on splitting apart
And all of the hateful ones
Feel free to threaten our hearts

Zika rode in behind ebola
Two crisies on end
All of the panic caused by it
Hardly helps people make amends

The Olympics were pretty great
But still pretty spotty
With bacterial bays, alge filled pools
And the antics of Ryan Lochtie

The globe's heat keeps rising on
Wreaking havoc on our climate
With polar ice melting, it grates
That people don't get science

My favorite sci fi heroes died
Those people who inspired
Those who gave us so much hope
Just suddenly expired

The local subway's been a mess:
It keeps catching on fire
After three times, it just seems
That we can't fix a wire

My brain seems to be getting worse
At being normal or sane
Somedays I just want to run
And dissolve into the rain

I ended my relationship
Of over a year
And lost touch with some friends
Whom I once held so dear

School just keeps getting harder
(Not too shocking to find)
But my Girl Scout and school projects
Might just fry my mind

My mom and I are getting to
A rough patch in our ways
And hiding my intrests from my 'rents
Takes so much of my days

My social circle only gets
Harder and harder to track
And my family's stories sound like soaps
Even though we have each other's backs

So can I just forget this year
Make it all fade away
Can I just go back to sleep
And face '16 another day

So can I just forget this year
Just please make it all end
And maybe in 2017
I'll be able to start again

what do little stuckists cry
when their painting talents die?
"this isn't art! you are not artists!
i'm close to art, you are the farthest!"

The cat comes on little fog feet.

It scratches at the door like a prisoner
and I let it out.

Again.