Adding blocks to the walls all around me
Standing in a growing tower
Continuing to fear as the drop grows more severe

You made a ladder to help me down
Each step was thought uncertain
Until you gave me your hand too

An ocean of tears turns into a river
Still turbulent but with direction
An emotional title wave takes me over

thus concludes a text
from a dear friend whom
I have never met, but this a,
concluding statement is
both convulsing and
uncontained

autumn is a her, a self-selected
gender unique, that picks its
own pronouns, pronunciations,
for women greet us with
warmth+chill skill
combinatory, to
make ordinary
our daily green
reform into
a multi~variable aristocracy of colors,
a forest of expressions,
each a statement leaf,
stating look at me,
I’m transformed, resurrected, disguised,
though essence unchanged, for
I am the possibles of ad
infinitum and I am:
not-nearly as potent
as the sparks of god
within a human being

3:58am
10-20-24

Some may know what I’d say
Some may know what I’d do
but no one knows the demons i hide
until i found the person i knew
that would understand me too

to show vulnerability
I confess with all the knowledge you now have
my mind wants to flee
for it is not for a public audience to hear nor see
as the world responds with sympathy or hostility
please i beg you respect my trust in you
and be gentle with me.

You have so many petals to share
Intricate curves and edges
But they’re densely packed inside you

The bees are buzzing
Yearning for their fill
The crisp air
Waiting to flow through you

The rain didn’t replenish
The sunshine couldn’t nourish
The soil never uplifted
The child failed to pluck you

A perfect recipe with an imperfect outcome
The sunshine hits and your stems are scorched
The storm rolls and the rain turns to acid
The soil poisons your roots

What brings life to most deadens you
The strongest being couldn’t live like this
You cry out for an escape
So the shadows begin looming

The darkness ensues and the energy departs

The sunshine no longer scorches
The rain no longer corrodes
The soil no longer venom

The shadows are your refuge
Safe from the outside
The torment

But it’s lonely now
You miss what it felt like to feel

Empty

Open up little flower

If it's meant to be
It will work out

I hope it's meant to be
Even if I have my doubts

Sometimes you need to wait & see
Sometimes you need to shout

All my life I've been loved and free
But never felt free to be out

It's time.
Now I let myself fall
out

greeted by the moonlight
embraced by the pain

losing hearing but gaining sight
in delirium, becoming sane

this is my night
this is my right

no longer any his or hers
not even mine or theirs

just this
just me

not even that


an entity