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Brent Kincaid Sep 2015
Here’s my question:
Don’t daughters lope their mules?
However non-existent
They too surely must bend the rules.
Surely it’s not only guys
Who secretly, daily slap their laps.
If so, would you bluenoses
Quickly and firmly shut your yaps?

There are so many things
Boys are not supposed to ever do
Like farting and belching
And all kinds of gods to apologize to.
We have to fold napkins
And keep our elbows off the table.
The list seems to grow.
I’m not sure I will ever really be able.

Adhering to what it takes
In life to keep myself perfectly decent
Seems to involve rules
Both ancient, ecclesiastical and recent.
I must put the lid down
Because, it seems, women can’t do it.
Hold the door open for them
Because, alone, they can’t go through it.

Give your seat up on a bus
Because even if they are younger than I
Women are the weaker ***
And I must be much stronger, I’m a guy.
And there literally hundreds
Of words I can’t say and shouldn’t think.
Now if only the women of the world
Would outlaw me getting near the kitchen sink.
Brent Kincaid Jun 2015
While not everybody naps
Simply everybody craps.
If you don’t you’re a goner
I swear by my honor
There’s no substitute for it
So just get used to it.
It’s like boogers, you see
It’s not talked of openly.

The public has an allergy
Of what can be said honestly.
You can admit to burping
But must do so excusing
As if you had taken a dump
Instead of expelling a lump
Of non-poisonous gas.
Society is a ***.

And while we’re at it
We live in a world here
Where ******* are reshaped
And formed by a brassiere
But no crotch bulges for men
Especially not big shaped ones.
As I have already implied
Society is a mean son-of-a-gun.

Breastfeeding an infant is
Seen as some kind of ****
But under-aged girls in bikinis?
That is why men were born.
They were put on earth to see
And love nature and its gifts.
But women in public should
Not show uncovered ****.

Just remember this and
You will do very well.
Being natural is for sure
The best way to go to hell.
You must always look to
The bluenosed of society
To shape your fine sense
Of decency and propriety.

A natural person, as God made
Is surely just the Devil’s work.
Because the Devil is more
Important that that God ****.
God and Santa make lists
And punish us by and bye
But Satan does it right now
And then spits in your eye.

So, be the proper citizen
And don’t do what is natural.
Following on nature’s bent
Will do you no good at all.
Even though the Bible won’t
Agree to this simple plan
Just look around you to learn
What is in society’s plan.
Amitav Radiance May 2015
Many are prisoners
Of their own contradictions
Vacillating between  
The real and unreal
Finally the masks
Wear off
Thus revealing
The real heart
Sitting on
The pinnacle
Of ego
Smiling
Yet, frowning within
Through the lens
Of faulty perspectives
Life becomes
A nightmare
Mike Essig Apr 2015
World says, must;
I say, won't:
pain results.
Classic definition
of a ****-up.
  - mce
How I got this way.
Amitav Radiance Jan 2015
Existential crisis
Fundamental flaws
Insurmountable dilemma
Confabulations galore
Indistinguishable chaos
Contraindications
Untenable maladies
Nature’s riled
Abject behavior
Peripheral existence
Satire of reality
Bobbie Bachelor Dec 2014
She walked outside to get a breath of fresh air
She saw that there was snow on the ground
But she didn't have a jacket on
Just a skirt
With nylon leggings

The wind started to blow
And she felt the snow
Blow her around

And then it stopped

She shut the door
And went back inside

She walked over to the computer
And sat down in a wooden chair
And kind of shivered a little

As the snow was melting on her hair

She moved her head back and forth really quickly
And shaked the snow off of her hair

I don't look pretty

she giggled

She kind of smoothed out her hair
With her hands
And curled it around her fingertips

Then she felt kinda hungry
And left her chair
And started sliding a little

She got to the refrigerator door
She looked around
And there was a mountain dew

Yeah

She turned around quickly
And was spinning
And got a little dizzy

She drank her mountain dew
And burped

I'm drunk

She staggered back to the wooden chair
And set her pop by the computer
Which she's not suppose to do
But always does anyways

Hmmm
Hmmm
Hmm
Hmm
Hmmm
Hmm
Hmm
Hmm
Hmm

She clicked on a video on youtube
And clicked out really quick
And made a sour face and squinted

She typed something else in
She looked down the screen
Scrolled down
Double clicked

Waiting for it to load
Clicked out
Didn't load

She kinda got a little upset
And grabbed her mountain dew
Got up from the computer
And smashed her knees against the stupid computer thingy

Spilled a little mountain dew on her skirt

Whatever

She grabbed her mountain dew
Held it by the inner tab
And spun around slowly

Didn't cut herself

Spinned around again
Heart racing
Didn't cut herself

Slowly took her pointer finger out
And started drinking again

She walked into the living room
Going
Hmmm
Hmmm
Hmmm
Hmmm

Hmmm
Hmmm
Hmmm
Hmm

Sat down on the couch
With her kitten in the kitchen
By the computer

She turned the tv on
And watched spongebob squarepants

It was in the middle of the episode where mermaid man was saying
Evil
Eeeeevil

She just sipped her mountain dew quickly
And didn't swallow it right away

Then she rubbed her feet against the ground
And her kitten
Hopped away from the kitchen
And waited by her feet
She looked down

Made a face
And placed her foot on top of her kitty's head
And the kitten backed off and bumped into the tv

While the episode of spongebob was still playing

She changed the channel
Started kicking her feet
Back and forth
Without touching the ground

She looked outside
And the snow was blowing harder
So she got off of the coach
Opened the door
And felt the snow blow against her skin again

She shivered again
Shut the door
Shaked her head
Brushed down her hair

Ran into the kitchen
Then ran back upstairs
To her room
Turned around
And the kitten was at the bottom of the steps

She shut the door quickly
Fell to the ground
And looked under the door
And saw the kitten
She came close to the door
And pawed at it a little
Then hopped back down stairs

On the last step
Tumbled

She's left alone a lot
That's why she's so strange

She felt her stomach make a hungry noise
She was craving tacos

I wonder if there's any leftover tacos from yesterday in the fridge
She walks downstairs

Slides to the fridge
Kitten hops away
She opens the door

Nothing

She shuts the door
Slides back to the computer
Sat down

And started to feel really bored
Then got out of the chair
Walked over to the door

And felt it with her hand
Without opening it

It was cold out
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