Same exact date but of different pace
Now reminiscing what happened in that place
That chilly night as we race
Through the situation of life and death.
I still clearly remember
As I was murmuring prayers
Which I poorly and randomly constructed
Even God can't quite understand clearly.
In the midst of the night, we rushed to the hospital
Advised that she must be confined
So my father left me behind
To tend her and to keep an eye.
She told me to take some rest but I disagree
Under her sweet voice I fell asleep unnoticeably
Wishing I never did
'cause that cost me a lifetime of guilt.
Waken up to see her in hysterical
Of the squeezing in her heart that could be fatal
Enough to make me frantic
Trying to think of the essentials.
As I watched her struggling for her breath
I tried to held back the tears that can't help but stream
Not wanting her to see me losing
Hope for her so she'll keep on fighting.
Hoping for a miracle as they recucitate her
I knew it there but still in denial
And at the crack of the dawn
I lost her...without even saying "Goodbye."
That is one of those times
When you want to gather all those spared hours
And add every single second of it to that very moment
So you could change the course of fate but couldn't.
The feeling of helplessness
Like a bird without its wings
Can't think of anything
But weep about everything.
Thoughts running in my mind
As unstoppable as the river flow
Tears running down my face
Streaming like the waterfalls.
The pain was unbearable
Especially when you got no one to lean on
Because the one you can always count on
Is the one you're bleeding for.
It's been three years
But why do I feel devastated after all this time?
Then someone answered me,
" 'cause the memories of the past never go away.
They are with us till the end of our time."
This may be a memory of the past now
But unlike any other, it will never be forgotten
A past that's always a part of my present
And will always play a big role in my future...
Krystal Marcelo
*01/22/16
I dedicate this poem to my one and only Mom.
I love you and I miss you so much!