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faa May 2018
Painting my mask with colours
Reds, greens and blues
Tainting my shell with patterns
Stripes, dots and hues

Wearing my mask I leave
Strutting down the streets  
Inside, my soul miserably grieves
Once I return to my sheets

The mask I decorated so strikingly
The mask I wear so elegantly
The mask I hold so sincerely
Is the mask I fashioned with dishonestly

Painting my mask with cries
Blacks, whites and greys
Tainting my shell with lies
Tears streaming as I pray
My confidence long astray
faa May 2018
Your fingers swept
Delicately grasping
The Heartstrings
I never knew existed
The Heartstrings
I thought were split

After so much trauma
After so much agony

As of current
The string are now
Between your fingertips
You tugged
You played
Mildly, wildly
Orchestrating
As you pleased
with much caution
Allowing them
To stay intact
And not snap

Regardless of
How suddenly you found
my Heartstrings lost
I trusted you to play
The same way
You trusted me to stay
faa May 2018
Why
Do my fingers
Find its way
To grasp pens and scribble
Endless adjectives on paper
Until I drain the ink out
And fill all my notebooks with lead
Striving to describe your immaculacy?

Why
Do my fingers
Run their tips across
The keyboard of letters
Pressing out the syllables
Forming verbs and nouns
Struggling to define how much of my heart you hold?

Why
Does my heart
Find harmony in wasting my time
Pondering, writing, loving, day dreaming
The perfection you have become?

Why
Is only all I ever asked myself
But I have never wondered;
How I manage to make the simplest of words
Sound so exquisite
Whenever my hands
Scribble and scribble endlessly
About you

Forever asking the Why’s
And never asking the How’s
The How’s that prove
My own worth along with yours
faa May 2018
Actuality you dismissed with much grace
As a mirage, your presence swept past
Grazing silky skin, trailing behind no trace
My mind in a trance, with the spell you cast

One moment, your company feels vivid;
Sensing the warmth of your calloused skin on mine
Eyes benign with care, coarse skin so livid;
Heart waltzing, chills pirouetting down my spine

One moment, you swiftly rid your own existence
As if our affection and affinity is no more
You deemed us lovers, even with this distance!
And I blindly believed, to our love I swore

Your unpredictability, I questioned with concern
Are you a figment of my imagination? Or of my reality?
No matter what, my whole being will forever yearn
For you, the Phantom of my most mystified fantasy

— The End —