To The Woman**
Yes, you remember,
You certainly remember
The way I listened
Standing at the wall
As you walked to and fro about the chamber
Reproving me
With bitter words and all.
You said
That it was time we"d parted,
And that my reckless life,
For you, was an ordeal,
And it was time a new life you had started
While I was fated
To go rolling downhill.
My love!
You didn"t care for me, no doubt.
You weren"t aware of the fact that I
Was like a ruined horse, amidst the crowd,
Spurred by a dashing rider, flashing by.
You didn"t know
That I was all a-smoke,
And in my life, turned wholly upside-down ,
I was in misery, downhearted, broke,
Because I didn"t see which way we were bound.
When face to face
We cannot see the face.
We should step back for better observation.
For when the ocean boils and wails
The ship is in a sorry situation.
The world is but a ship!
But all at once,
Someone, in search of better life and glory,
Has turned it, gracefully, taking his chance,
Into the hub of storm and flurry.
Well, which of us
On board a mighty boat
Has never brawled nor barfed nor fallen down?
There are not many of them that will not
Despair when they"re about to drown.
Me, too,
To loud hue and cry,
But knowing well what I was doing
Went down to the hold where I
Might keep away from scenes of spewing.
"Hold" was a Russian pub
Where I
Drank, listening to the loud bicker,
I tried to stop my worries by
Just drowning myself in liquor.
My love!
I worried you, oh my!
Your tired eyes revealed dejection,
I didn"t hide from you that I
Had spent my life in altercation.
You didn"t know
That I was all a-smoke,
And in my life, turned wholly upside-down,
I was in misery, downhearted, broke,
Because I didn"t see
Which way we were bound.
....................................
Now many years have passed,
I"m not so young today.
I do not feel the same, and I have new ideas,
And here at festive table I will say:
Long live the one who"s at the steers!
Today I,
Seized by tender feelings so,
Recall your wistfulness, and I am happy
To tell you straight, for you to know,
About what I was
And what has happened!
My love,
I"m glad to tell you that
I have escaped a bad descent, an"
Today I"m in the Soviet land
A staunch supporter and defender.
I"m not the man
I used to be.
I wouldn"t hurt you now
The way I did. So silly!
And I would follow Labour, feeling free,
As far as English Channel, really.
Forgive me please,
I know that you have changed.
You live with an intelligent,
Good husband;
You don"t need all this fuss and all this pledge,
And you don"t need me either, such a hazard.
Live as you do
Lead by your lucky star
Under the tent of fern, if there"s any.
My best regards,
You"re always on my mind, you are,
Yours, faithfully,
S e r g e y Y e s e n i n.
Excellent Russian poet who hanged himself at age 30. When it comes to angst, no one beats the Russians.