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Colm  Sep 2018
She Is Ember
Colm Sep 2018
You are ember with less orange
You are tree bark true and brook trout at play
You are earthy as the hollow dell in the Catskills still
Turning as the waterways

You are ever moving, always slight
Looking back over those delicate shoulders of yours
To the footprints of me
And in the time spent therein not a day’s older

I don’t know her name
But I know what I see
Passing. Glances. Scent of trees.
Last night was grass ripping, candy melting disappointment
His eyes have grown cold around his warm (once warm) chocolate eyes
We had an amazing weekend camping in the Catskills together (except for the rain and when he took my phone)
he can’t live without me yet
his shoulders are weighed down, I don’t think he remembers what dancing feels like-
except when we make love
The only (last) smile I’ve seen on him was before/during/after *******
I have spent my whole life making things more difficult for everyone I love
My penguin found it was easier to trap himself in a glacier than to
face the possibility of not catching any fish

I believe him when he says he doesn’t remember his freak outs
his night terrors, when he manically thrashes like venomous wave crashes
I believe him to be drowning
I know how he feels
I am my mother dealing with myself 2-3 years ago
and so before and hereafter
I stopped drowning myself when I saw my loved ones swallowed by the tide
swallowed by my overwhelming sea of depression ( okay it took me a few tries)
but I had support

My love is drowning and I’m afraid I’m going under
which is alright considering I’m with the love of my life
but what about all of my ferocious attempts at trying to stay alive?
All my mother’s strength wasted on carrying a shattered girl
All my brother’s love he shows in funny ways yet
All my brother’s love brings peace into my days

How can I rely on someone when that someone relies on me?
How can I carry the weight of a beautiful boy’s mountainous
depression/suicideality
How can I not help or be there for the most wonderful man going through
the most terrible sandstorm when I know EXACTLY how that feels
How am I going to continue believing in myself when the luckiest,
most unbelievable circumstance of love doesn’t believe life is worth living?

Depression can be temporary
Depression can be lifelong
How can I watch myself fall off the step
I waled back and forth from until my toes begged me to stop
until my soul begged me to stop

I know of few things to be true
I know of our age and how we’re too old to be this young
I know I have never loved anyone else as much as I love him
I know he thinks he loves me, I believe him
I know we’re meant to be together not in a soulmate way
in a I want to wake up next to his soft face, mahogany eyes and golden smile
for the rest of my life

I know he is having trouble turning on the lights because he;s terrified the bulbs will explode
I know it took me a really (really ******* long) long time to accept myself
and I still have a ing way to go until I actually like myself
I know he’s struggling and I’ve done everything I can do to help him
and nothing at all to help myself
I will always love him
Allison Ashton Nov 2011
Stony yet soft.
A two-edged sword.
Giving, taking.
Man's relentless disease
infiltrates the land
and swept into the creek,
leaving behind secrets,
tales, laughter, crying, pain
hidden beneath the creeks mud
Vomiting up stench
from years before
when the land was walked.
And w/o warning a
precious soul is tossed
onto the creeks stream.
Why?
We question the gentle
creek turned to rage and
relentlessly removing, destroying
all in it's path and a precious soul.
A sacrifice, a forgotten respect,
from years before waiting??
And we question.
a shooting star is born
from the bleakness
of the heavenly spheres

racing to earth
the flashing streak sears
a burning path across the sky

at dazzling speed
it accelerates, slashing
the porous atmosphere
like a laser bolt from
Zeus's own hand

then evaporates
into the nothingness
of the midnight sky

the universe remains
little changed from its
advent and passing

Charlie Parker:
Star Eyes

jbm
Catskills, NY
8/88
Colm  Mar 2017
Miss Sunrise
Colm Mar 2017
This sunrise is very beautiful
With a hue of pink and a rareness which
Befits the weariness of red eyes

As slowly over the Catskills she
Rises and resides
Until she can be seen within the sky

Pure as almond and ivory  
Backed by the dawn and the day alike

Who am I to stand here in her way?
Who am I to say that she shouldn’t try?

I can only trust and occasionally wish
That she would honor me with a simple kiss
Of morning dew, and a smile wide

For that, in this, my morning eyes  
Would bring great joy to me in my life
Just as with above... With everything there comes a reason.
The eloquence of the broken is
Incredibly eloquent; Hard men
Do cry when the truth is spoken
Time is once we were young; now
We are young still;  that is why we
Cry.  Then and now are One but are
Broken into past and present and our
Heart in two; our soul is given words
That pulse from our wounds like blood

For Barbara remembering you on one starry night; and
||PBS story about young people  going to Casa Susanna
zebra  Dec 2020
Borscht Belt Doc
zebra Dec 2020
he watched her excitedly
eat **** shaped food
especially eclairs
as she languidly tongued
the white buttercream
from the sides of her mouth

thinking of her
his masturbations
powered the lights
of the Catskills

it wasn't just his profession
it was his obsession

just another horney
borsht belt gynecologist
https://www.bing.com/videos/search?q=bordchtbelt+humor&docid=608009001296593341&mid=97D5DA384A98BD24BFED97D5DA384A98BD24BFED&view=detail&FORM=VIRE
Jude kyrie Jan 2016
There’s a famous town that does not exist
It’s in new York state in the Catskills.
It is name Agloe.
It’s a paper town.
Put on the map in an insignificant place.
To protect the mapmakers in 1925
from copyright infringement
By unauthorized reproduction of the map.
I followed a map once all the way to
a place that did not exist.
I travelled slowly to it
Mile by mile.
I loved the thought of living there.
I even fell in love with it.
But it turned out to be a paper heart.
Filling a space where the real heart
Should be it had no feelings or love
It was paper just to look like a heart
to outsiders like me.
So after all the tiring journey
to find it.
I found out It never existed.
Just like Agloe
On the old paper map.
But Agloe never
broke anyone’s real heart.
Google removed Agloe from Google maps
it did exist for awhile on there.
KD Miller  May 2016
Michael
KD Miller May 2016
short story  i wrote in 11/1/2014*

Decomposing sewer rat- that's the smell that will always remind me of her.
A tow colored ponytail, pulled back tautly with the smallish bobby pins holding down her page bangs, would greet me every time I walked into the cafeteria at lunch. She was a new kid, a sophmore, and I didn't know her name. She sat alone by the big red painted double doors. Everyone in the school wanted to get out-  but she seemed to always be smiling. It was my second semester of senior year, after winter break, after weeks of seeing the same girl sitting alone and never seeing her hair down that I decided to finally sit down next to her. The way she ignored my varsity jacket was striking- though it was my older brother's, the football team's logo always seemed to impress new girls who didn't know any better. She just kept on eating her yogurt. And then she looked to her right. And she kept on smiling. 'Hello, and your name is...?'
'Mike,' I offered my hand. And you? She just said her name was J.
I took it but wasn't satisfied. She went on to tell me she was new, from Burlington, Vermont- that she hated Scarsdale. And the bell rung. I went home that night endlessly calculating what the J could've stood for- Jennifer? Jessica? June? Jessica had me by the heels and she held me upside down. It took me days and days and finally a week and finally even a month to convince June that we should see each other outside of school. And then it took me that night taking out the trash to find out that Jennifer lived three doors away from me in a huge limestone manor. Then it took me the next day to convince her that- hey- tomorrow is a Friday, why not do something?
June said yes, put her sweater sleeve to her hand. I read once in a European studies textbook that in Elizabethan playhouses, they would sell orange rinds in little tea bags for people to hold up to their noses- the smell of all the people who didn't know about washing was so nauseating. It was ten pm when she called me that night and told me her parents would be in the Catskills and she hadn't seen my parent's cars in our driveway- so why not go to the city?
I took it in careful consideration that lasted approximately 5 seconds. I said yes si and da in every language possible. Something told me to go with her. I thought of the way she always smiled whether it was wide or wan and I could hardly wait for Friday night at 10pm.
The next day we drove to the city in her Audi cabriolet. I played New Order- but we didn't get to the city in the time we expected. The woods seemed to go on to the tune of the Perfect Kiss.
But by Face Up, we were in the city. We'd parallel parked in front of some bar  and made our way around. Then halfway through the sidewalk she asked. "Can we ride the subway?" I nodded. I supposed a Vermont girl had never seen New York City anyways. We took the R train at Rector until the end of the line. Then we went home. After that day, She went home after she dropped me off. I didn't find out what J meant or was and then it took three days to see that Jessica's house was actually just a forest. There was no limestone. It felt real, the riding the R train and the music in our ears  and even the yogurt she had eaten. But it took the next morning to monday to see there had never been a girl named J and the table was empty. It hadn't been a dream but I had to wonder if it was even real. But the other day I was on my way to Lexington  and I had sworn to god i'd seen her on the rails- on the rails! I cried for help but everyone just stared. Then I grabbed my briefcase and decided to go home instead of work for the day.
Nat Lipstadt Apr 14
East River: The Many Calories in Water and Words**

this weighty obsession, counting the energy
consumed and disbursed,
to be lean but not mean,
traverses into its third year

a late start does not forgive
over Forty years of transgressions, that damage,
sustained and in part irreversible,
yet I awake this Sunday morn,
all quiet on the East Side front, observing the East River flows
on the surface, contented and uncontested,
strongly bound for faraway Oceans unknown, and it tickles my
imagination that the rain from the nearby Adirondack and Catskills mountains might soon be quenching thy flora, fauna and your parched throats, confirming and conforming our connection and threading our interwoven tapestries, our unified aqueduct, carrying
with more than poetic words, but poetic water!

this notion sustains in multiple manners, and I deep drink the calm and the power as if it were,
for it is,
a daily vitamin,
calorie free,
God  delivers

Delivering
us with
its contained and contentented potency,
to all
in equal dosage

and now the script finished,
the water imbibed,
this baptized, scripture loving
mind and body
as/is
wholly holy
refreshed,
as are we,
my friend

8:38AM
April 14, 2024
by the East River
preservationman Feb 2015
I had received fortune of wealth
Yet in the dream I was still in good health
I had a Mansion high up in the Catskills of New York overlooking the Hudson River
Then had a summer home in Paris, France by a swan lake
It was breathtaking in a picture take
I would often sail on my yacht in some summers in the Hamptons on Long Island
It then would be travelling on my private jet and head over to Los Angeles to venture on Catalina Island
I would be lying on the beach getting a deep dark tan
The eye of riches of the sun at my command
Well, it was all a dream
My own imagination being a subconscious stream
All this happened while I was asleep
This was all in my memory to keep
At least I can dream
Being rich is what it might seem.

— The End —