i have this silly little habit.
this habit of thinking.
overthinking, worrying, fearing.
but you make me happy.
you make me feel safe.
i trust you fully.
i love you completely.
& i don't want to overthink
or worry
or be fearful.
i just want this.
you.
us.
so i'll ignore the voice screaming in my head
saying it must be too good to be true
& listen to my heart whispering
"it's okay to be happy."
because the things it screams about
will only come true
if i let it.

i'm not the kind of person who trusts easily.
i guard my heart & test people's limits.
i push & push until they're exhausted.
i'm always scared to be abandoned again,
so i leave before they can.
& when i learned to trust,
i was still paranoid.
i don't trust easily,
i don't trust.
but then there's you.
& somehow, without saying a word
i trust you completely.

i have learned so much of myself
i have learned of my mistakes
my failures
& faults.
i've been reacquainted with myself
i have learned of my greatness
my kindness
& love.
i still have much of myself left to give
but i need to give those wonders
to myself
only.
only i can appreciate my full self
only i can love my full self
until otherwise
proven.