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  Dec 2016 Nadine Sharise Hayes
Stephan


Here in this place where I once played,
midst memories now cast aside
The clouds my worthless life has made,
rain down in teardrops I have cried
Thank you to all of my friends here who have supported and encouraged me. I appreciate each and every one of you.  I hope I have shown you the same kindness you have always shown me. This will be my last for while, I need some time to figure out who I am and how I became that person. Thanks again.
the early bird crows
I listen to the sunrise
the cloud fingers
plucking the strings of
a golden harp
Thoughts while waking to the sunrise.
First the sky
lets loose a cloud,
suddenly I'm drowning
in the emptiness of shadows,
the silence of alone.
Vacant now
but revisited often,
the space within
once occupied by you.
The love we shared,
a beautiful mess
of memories
I can't forget.
A grievance of time,
I waste days and nights on you,
pen of black ink running,
writing poety
to express how much
you meant to me.
Truly
words fall short,
a fraction of these feelings
of love,
fragments of heart
devoid of you
yet hopelessly devoted to you.
It is an odd thing
to fall in love with Winter,
the realization
moments are now memories,
a beautiful tragedy.
In the end
what was once freshly beginning
is now rotten and stale.
I stink of regret,
an ache with a desperate wish
I could forget you.
As the night drags on,
the hole within me deepens,
a hollowing sound,
the echo of the moonlight
disappearing into the sea.
Chill wraps around me
an avalanche of snow,
like all flowers destined to decay
without light,
I sink into cold shoulders
of midnight blues.
Missing you.
Is there no fate worse
than death,
except in the suffering
of the living left
grieving the loss of what was
or what will never be?
Perhaps
someday
the sun will see it fit
to shine again,
revive the dead,
wither the pain
within me;
place my heart
on the pedastal
of love's elusive bloom.
Im not sure what's worse, the breaking or the tedious journey of putting the pieces back together again. The end of holding on, and beginning the process of letting go.
Inside the marrow
of Winter's bone
breathes a sparrow
goodbye is not goodbye
a broken record
the **** of memory
moments paused
eventually play on
all is not lost
but found in the echo
the neverending
sound mind

It appears
I am the Autumn leaf
bereft of color
left at the foot
of your tree
forgotten by all
parts of you
except memory
I've lost all but me
I am stuck between
a rock and a hard place again
and the pain is excruciating.

Today
in the battle of the mind
depression is winning.

Perhaps tomorrow
I will find the strength
to even the score.
Many times I find myself writing poems about living with depression and the everyday struggle to overcome it. It is indeed a grueling battle, but a war, in the end, I will win. Submittung this one to a new literary journal geared toward sharing insight into mental illness. Looking forward to the opportunity and the possibility of getting one of my submissions published.
in the sky
a pale reflection of
curved spines
you were always the big spoon
and I the little one
The moon often inspires me to write, especially at night when the nostalgia of cuddling with a past lover washes over my mind.
paper hearts
all of these poems I write
unearthing depth
floating above the river
the reflection of my face
Ive gotten a little better at the english modern tanka form. Miles to go toward mastering but I like where Im heading. Sn: The title of the poem is also the title of my upcoming first poetry book.
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