you dreamt of him last night.
you can't remember what he said
but his mouth whispered poetry
and his hands made a screenplay.

he wrote a note on a napkin
with a blue ballpoint pen,
you can't recall what it read
but such a phrase could start a novel.

you crumpled the paper towel in your hand with rage,
he ran back into your mind and lit a fire in your heart
causing your pulse to waltz and hum
to the song that played.

you dreamt of him once more
for words he said the last time you met his eyes.
you were drunk, of course
and a sentence can become a masterpiece in the blink of an eye.

draining half a bottle of cheap *****
merged with sour lemonade and stale diet coke
won't stop you from making similes between running your fingers through his hair
and the bubbling sensation of a fizzy drink.

i know you tried coffee and it made your hands tremble
with a wariness that obliged them to write,
and you compared caffeine to his touch
and the colour of coffee to the specks in his eyes.

i also know cigarettes didn't work,
their bitter taste reminds you of the arrogance in his expression
when he utters your name,
the despise contained in those two words until articulated by his face.
you don't need another drug that inspires metaphors longing to be made.  

his scent can't be replaced by twelve glasses of perfumed champagne
and even if caffeine makes your heart beat faster than he ever did
all you see in coffee grounds are his big brown eyes and his chocolate mane.
reeking of cigarettes won't do more than cloud your windpipe and put in mind the burn of your hands intertwined.

no substance will ever overshadow the drug a human being can come to be and no abstinence syndrome will be as dreadful as waking up from a dream.

'estimate: 443.000 people die prematurely from tobacco abuse'
i read from the crumpled cardboard box which holds the rest of the deadly weapons i often oscillate with *****.

grey ashes flutter around,
smoke in the atmosphere fades into the fumes of cars,
my eyes water
is it because of fog or cries?

i take a deep, long drag;
my mouth utters an inaudible chuckle,
tears burn my cheeks, i mumble shrieks.

sadness overflows my surroundings,
everything turns blue,
streetlights,
billboards,
faces;
rain floods my shoes.

wrenched in cold and shivering,
i wonder,
how many whom are stuck with the repulsive vice
deeply desire to die prematurely
because of some gloomy eyes.