I love people watching
Seeing the way they have put themselves together
Watching the dust sweep from underneath their soles as they glide through this moment

I am dumbfounded by the myriad of people and their intricate designs,
In the most non-creepiest way, of course

The scars they show as medals
The wrinkles they try to hide but pop out in a burst of laughter
The different happy feet movements
The little walking hums
The hand swing gestures between couples
The ones that trod around avoiding interaction
The ones that smile ever so fervently trying to connect with complete strangers
The ones that catch me

Oh dear, hi! Awkward smiles, now look away, quick!
People, such restless things, aren't we?

There is something so sacred in the way a person walks when they are happy
And something so enticing about those who walk in uncertainty

What are they thinking? Are they even present? Do they realize that this moment is their actual life? That it is the only truth they will ever know
second.by.second

So they should do that thing
Tell him you love him
Hold his hand even though you are mad at him
Hold onto your mother no matter how old you are
Eat the food!
To not care but not be careless
It's hard, no?

Our egos mixed with fear
Such ****** things
Such menacing and parasitic things

These ideals of what should be, of what should matter - They all fly away with the cold and bitter air that we exhale

Perhaps, Bob Dylan was right when he sang, the answer my friend is blowing in the wind"

And I hope it whirls at our lives like the enormous jolt of bravery you get in your heart when you accomplish something that frightens you.

And then, dear people, I hope we do all the things!

this is the core
of my prayer to You:

all I have is a scrap
deeply wounded faith
darkness tries to swallow me whole
the devil & his demons flay me

Throughout my trials and tribulations
the Lord has wounded me greatly
as I have also wounded myself
& been wounded by life

Still the Lord carries me daily
as He carried me on a Cross one Passover Day
I am slain daily by things within and without my control
the pain too burdensome to bear

Yet He gifted me stubbornness of spirit
to not give up in spite of the hurt
I thank Him for the gift of making me a warrior
to fight in this brutal spiritual war

His Spirit renews me daily
even when I turn away
lost amongst carnalities of life
until I am broken again

*Jeremiah 17:7-8

Blessed is the man who trusts in the Lord,
And whose hope is the Lord.
For he shall be like a tree planted by the waters,
Which spreads out its roots by the river,
And will not fear[ when heat comes;
But its leaf will be green,
And will not be anxious in the year of drought,
Nor will cease from yielding fruit...

You say you have found
Your remedy
You say it gives you ecstasy.
It's the only therapy
that keeps you Sane.

But my dear,
All I see is a life in vain.

You withdrew yourself from society
You said it brought you enmity.
You preferred to be cuddle
by your remedy.

It keeps you warm,
It numbs the pain.
It quenches your desires.
It lits up a fire.
You feel safe.

But my dear,
you have lost your way
Your mind is clouded dark grey.
You're blinded by foggy days.
I hope you come back
to your sense.
Open your eyes and look through
your lens.

Don't let your remedy
**Be your death penalty.