You think you're in the driver's seat
Well you've been taken for a ride so many things that you once had have been taken away...
.. denied
They keep giving you the runaround
Until you are too tired to notice
that you are nothing but a pawn
Inventory... to fulfill the quotas

Moving forward toward the destination
As we fall backward into self-segregation
Cops on one side
Citizens taking up positions on the other
Long gone seem to be those days
When we consider each other our brothers

Learn to park the car so the camera can't see the action...
the infraction
What good is a camera on the chest
If all it takes is a thumb
to cover up the reality... the brutality of a retaliatory arrest

Army surplus fulfilling the wish list
Demoralizing the urban vision
Where things have risen
To the point that if you do not know your station
They always have a backup plan in the form of private prisons

"BUILD IT AND THEY WILL COME!"

BUSINESS AS USUAL TRUMP'S THE VISUAL
Seeing isn't always believing
Pain for you will always profit some
The rich keep getting richer..
... As the poor keep getting trod on
And politicians keep saying that's just what they brought on... To themselves

Not the way that I see it
ONE PERSON - ONE VOTE
SO IF YOU ARE TAKING NOTE
You will see
How they all keep trying to gerrymander us into their encampment
And now everyone is building camps... Of their own

Self - segregation...
Falling into a wayward Nation
Of tribal bands as they expand
With any vision it's easy to see
That the cost of preservation
will be that gang with which you hang
Even if it means a gun battle in a parking lot..
.. a crowded parking lot when the cops are present and aware

Because a nation of too many laws
Will become a lawless Nation
Much like the one we already have
But if you think that I have gone too far
Just ask yourself... ask yourself
Who it is.. who it is..
... That we really are.

Make Love not war
Make peace not pieces
Break bread not treaties
never stops until it ceases
To be a trade off...
... Instead of a trade up
A right of passage
Instead of passing our rights
Like they are non- existent
Ghostly memories of...
Dead cars on highway shoulders
Oil stained ,shattered diamond pieces
Shimmering in the afternoon sun
Ominous reflections at the periphery
Of the headlamps nighttime gaze
among the maze
Of shadowed voids
and truncated  moments of reflective light
Gone as quickly as they appear
Just as I fear will besmirch
any rising hope seen... feared.... disappeared
In a disallusioned world weary quest
To accept what is ,what was and what wasn't as what will be
Simply because there are too many
Who want to make war & not love
and shatter into pieces ...all talk of
...or chances for true peace
Remember the drama, hopes and pain
That bit of chrome or reflective red plastic
Tells to those rushing by
from time to endless time
Your story awaits your presence
Somewhere up the line

People always say
" You will eat those words!"
and I think how stupid it is
to believe that...
as your words are more likely to eat you, than the other way round.

If you could truly imagine
What it would be like to be blind
From birth or later in life …..obviously would change your state of mind
yet either course would be a source
of altered apperceptions …deceptions and apparitions
So that which was never seen
May or may not really mean
the same to those who once could see
therefore there are  those
who choose to believe
that they can conceive
by concept and projection
the differences…. that lay between
weak or strong-right or wrong
all truths remain
subjects to
the status of ..
   that portal to the mind
and in what way
one chooses and uses
their power of perception

Consider for a moment
What might life be like
were you unable to hear
to never know all
those things
being unaware of caused you to miss
from chirping birds
to a honking horn
of bitter scorn
or one whose purpose was to warn
for again we find
it's all intwined
with the threshold
at the doorway of
…an open or closed mind!

You might believe you can conceive
what life without arms would entail
a body without legs..or both
begs considerations
few able-bodied choose to make
as they pass by…
diverting their eye
to get beyond and leave them in your wake
sad how quickly that was accomplished
physically …at least
but how it's done mentally, emotionally,
or morally
is for each to deal with in turn
with lingering regret
or complete absence
of concern
ones own life moves on
in every sense of the word…until suddenly it doesn't
and maybe then you  realize
what you imagined wasn't anything like you thought
Think about that next time you wake up
get dressed,
grab your keys and walk out to your car,
tune up some media,
check the mirror view,
back up a bit
and move forward into your day …as you encounter someone crowding into your lane,
cutting you off as if you were unseen,
as they rush to leave you behind..
be they unconcerned by your honking
distracted by the real world
or within the vagaries of their mind
barely missing you
as they run the light
and you wonder, mumble or yell out " Are you deaf or are you blind?
Then go see what you can do about propping open or removing what exists …at the threshold of …
Otherwise you need to accept that they were just people moving forward in their lives.
no different than you are….if you cannot truly imagine anything like that…then I feel sorry for your loss.

...Something so familiar
seemed to be hanging
just outside my periphery...
like an annoying honey bee
Suddenly I popped up
from a languid moment
of heat driven exhaustion....
knowing something
had to be done.
So I grabbed my official hat
out my office door I...hobbled along  
due...to... my left leg being asleep
"wake up you fool"
I muttered as I angled
past the front desk
where
that new deputy stood playing on some little box
"Is that an IPOD?"
No sir! what's an Ipod ?
never mind
just keep people off that bridge
till I return and tell you different! Is that clear?
Yes sir Danial...uhhh chief ...!
Good now get going.

I got to go talk to the D. A.
then out I went to the most oppressive sept heat seen in decades

"NO! No way! That's not possible!"
You think so...? the chief asked
well just look out there in the streets.
Where are the kids-
home studying for school when it's still 2 days away?
Raymond Frazer D.A. for Upton county + 2 more back in the hill country.
"I am...de...
doodlytermined
so you coming?
"Yeah chief...but just to prove you...
can't and won't
overstep your authority."
And who would determine that? Judge.... Willoughby?well let's go see what he has to say then.
If you can get him
to approve your overreach
I won't say another word!

Hello Judge my dispatcher call you?
"Yes. She did and ,I must say...lunch?sure ,but it sounds like a walk down memory land lane
We might as well! gonna get some good bbq and cold beer out on the hiway.
10 minutes.
We will pick you up
after you get done with Betty Lou

oh and write this on a sheet of of cardboard and post it. .*** the judge chuckled
be there to pick you up in a jif.

Who's Betty Lou? And where we going now?
Find that Deputy of mine give him a special assignment.

County ordinance or 2
So ....
Technically
we were trespassers
By all truth of right, wrong or law...but
No harm meant by the rules
we bent
MAYBE...
Telling too many seemed the major flaw


That overbearing, solar flaring, heat streak
summer of desperation turned inspiration
When seeing people instead of watching people
Gave me different ways of creating separation

From what I see and what I'm shown
What I'm told and what it is
I actually hear
What I say and what I truly believe
And how somethings really are...just as they appear

Amazingly enough this cyber shift implosion
Crashed thru the outer me
careening around within my fragile core
While crouching down in a clump of bushes
Staring into caramel brown eyes of a girl...who was
Just as naked as me

It blew through town back then  like a hot dry wind on a July day
When people were melting like long stick candles   bowing
like an emissary to a King
In any window where the aftenoon sun shines bright
As it is
magnified...like the stupid cruel rumor

A rumor that a farmer broke a water main while plowing

Literally what else would it take to break
That fragil overbearingly irriatatingly ******* monotony
that held the midwest
American small towns dying summer that
year
a near-death grip
Except.... maybe...if
the rumor had
turned out to be phony

The trail of misfit cars, pickups, motorcycles rolling North
must have looked like the jailbreak/ carnival parade it was...that
seemed to gather stragglers like a magnet gathers iron filings
Soon on saddle bank road 120+ kids
Naked and as innocent in the fact...
That one might think that today was the day
they were born and in some ways...
they were! Fully fledged
in exodus
from the womb
of pure monotonous ladened
claustrophobic morality... have way to languished hedonistic daydreams

Static groups of slow-melting apparitions
Unaware uninspired unintended refugees
Of homes...
of family...
and abject boredom
of that sad summer of high petrol- low crude performance and
Summer jobs never blooming and now... add a drought.

As the final Saturday wilted on the absentee mind
Before the Monday rises to drag them back in...
...to the ritualized killing of all who found
The looming tedium  of lessons and tests
unbearably cruel to have school begin its pull
Without ever even having a glimpse
Of the dying ghost
of a summer break that never was.

Until...that steady drone
rose from a distance
Those 90cc pistons
spitting hope as its frantic echo
Seemed
to somehow announce
from 3 miles away
"help he's killing me!"

Razer was making that hybrid bike scream
then...right down main he came shouting thunderously
But to no avail...
....as every word
unheard...
undecipherable

"...daughter shake
bigganake
common shop..." was the word that ppl heard....

...then it died
PISTON ROD took off over the barbershop
Headed for the moon

Razer stood over the smoking carcus
Spit on it ...kicked it... then saluted it ...
Before saying hey common nowz its flowing and growing
Quicker than quick ...
and that was how summer came to a glorious end.

with a ten acres puddle
Water spraying 30 ft high and by gawd we took to it like
butter to hot biscuits.
until that is
the cops arrived!

And we all run to hide.
.. so here's where
I started this tale

Shhh.. I said
to this *******
beside me
Flesh-colored and glistening ...
We better stay put
you know...
... till it calms down
Hey!  I don't believe I've ever seen you around...the town before...
do you live here... in Braeden  I mean?

We just moved here
she said.
Hi, I'm Joy-Ann Hope
And she surely was at that!
  forever  ...well
Until I changed her last name and she became Joy-Ann PAYNE.
HEY IM NOT TO BLAME
9 MONTHS  later we
met a little girl
named Summer Dawn Payne!

We know all that Daniel...but you cannot expect us...the DA and Chief judge ..not to mention members of the school board and...
Shut that up Judge Willoughby...
and be Mickey Willoughby and Ray Ray ...not D.A.Frazier for a second so you can remember.
Think back 38 yrs and how that line of dried out ,dusty, forlorn kids suddenly came alive that day ...the horns honking, bicycle tires spinning and Ol Joey P ...rest his soul on that horse of his as it clattered along the concrete and clopped by the lead car by galloping along the grass shoulder.
Beat us all to the puddle and I will never forget what we saw when we got close
Him and the mare neck deep ...ha haha ha Yes. Joey P and Nantucket Grey were good people. Rest in peace old friends.

Okay ...the heck with it say the judge mickey to the sad moment of revered silence ...I'm about ready to retire and as I recall that day now I realize 1 thing
Crystal effen clear now
I saw Mary Hortons ...uhh Who that day..and that I somehow got old.
I'm sold Chief ...Sorry, Daniel what do we do?
Well Ray Ray County DA what do you not have to say now?

Just Question guys...shall we go get a tractor or sledge hammers?

Oh come on guys this is the 21 century and I am chief of police with ... well army surplus courtesy
of the fed gov and everything we said we would fix when we got "growed up"
Maybe today we help the next gen or two know what freedom really feels like.
Ray .. call the sheriff " little Bobbie Jones " and tell him
- and them-
to stay the f away.
Judges order.  
Hope wins again.

WHATS IN FASHION
IS...
THE DREAMS OF THIS GENERATION
IN HOPE
THAT THIS NATION
CAN MAN ITS STATION
IN THESE....
.... ESSENTIAL TIMES
WE ARE FACING
TRUTH IS A DYING BREED TO THE FALLEN SEED
OF A WITHERED ****
THAT RESTS ITS PEACE
IN THE BATTLE FIELD
WHICH FACES EAST
TO A RISING SON
THAT COMES SEEKING
POWER
TO BE HONORED
BY MANY WHO SHALL NEVER KNOW PEACE
IN THIS LIFE
OR IN THE WISDOM THEY ARE AFTER
BUT I SHALL HOPE .

There among the silage
Groomed the scarecrows of foolish dreams
Earthstained relics of past follies
And erstwhile fallen schemes
Where lost rumors bend fables
Out of scattered tales of woe
As tumbled foes aligned in rows
Defeated by the midnight mists
Stilted ...wilted to be bowed by amorous winds

Sometimes when you feel
Like you're down in a hole
Lost in the darkness
Losing control
Don't feel like fighting
Ready to just give in
Don't know where you're going
Or care where you've been
Way past believing
That you'll ever rise up again
From feeling so hopeless
Feeling so low
Then a passing stranger
smiles at you
...and simply says "Hello"
Sometimes...
....that's all...
that's all it takes.
"🙂HELLO "

Don't be scared
Life is many tiered
Layer upon layer
Is what makes you who you are
And in my eyes you will always be
A superstar
I knew you long before
You figured out who you are...
that needs to be shared ...don't be scared.

The open source
of my open sores
Is the reason why
  my open soars ....
...come so far and few between these days

IN  so many ways ...so much
Is being lost ...without fair value
for the price it costs
and no reason exists ..in the midst ..
..of all the turns and twists ...
...for not attempting to displace - replace , erase
OR EVEN EMBRACE
whatever grows from changes
From what is seen.... and by how one rearranges

Or even exchanges
ONE THING from another
One Another for another ...or another
for the ONE THING we already had ....
.....all along!

Living...flowing...ever knowing
GLOWING
like the wingtips of a flight-bound Dove
In shadowed effect of a sun-backed vision
Silvertipped and golden tinged ...glowing as hot as the sun
Without threat of being singed

Immune to the effects of latent remorse as a source
effecting the continuation of any open sores
that might reflect upon my own ability ...to take flight
IN MY EVER EXPANDING FREEDOM AS MY OPENSOARS

You once had some free time
so you threw it away
don't need another second when the blue skies
are turning to Gray

the crystal ball said it would be all right
all your old friends are doing fine
no need to worry ,
about anyone you can go to sleep
when your day is done
without a worry without a care
without a bit of wisdom
that you can share
just wear your blinders
and they'll keep out the light
to live in total darkness
will be all right

it's not as easy as it may seem to turn a nightmare
into a dream you could do it if you had some help
at least that's what you keep telling yourself while sitting on that rainbow colored mushroom
and talking to that orwellian elf
nobody has any reason these days
to catch the pieces of the old realities
so they seek out new ones
in their Stead and keep them in boxes
underneath their bed

someday when it rains
or who knows maybe when it snows
you'll have some time
to pull  it
and maybe see what life was all about
that is if you have any extra time
in order to check it out

check it out check it out

check out
how often
you always have time

to give a **** or give a thought
or a kind deed

kindness
never costs you much
but it can buy a lot

you may realize that truth someday
when the box beneath your  bed is empty .
..gone away what'you find
is there instead
are page of
the daily news
to keep you warm
to keep you dry
and to be your bed

sleep on the sidewalk

sleep out in the cold
thats where  you'll  find ...plenty of spare time
to try turning
that  nightmare into a dream like the one
that you were once sold
even though
its getting old'
its getting old
it's getting old
just like sleeping out
in the cold
watching  as time keeps passing by
it's getting old its getting so old.....and so am I.

strange is the range
of the moral high ground
when taken then forsaken
without a momentary pause
Often explained as simply
because
as if treason needs no reason
to be anything beyond embraced
while evoking
stoking
THE fires
of history
erased  
as if...
unseen  would mean never existed
When truth of facts
are subjected to constant attacks
they may appear ...
to disappear
like the boundaries
of a moral high ground
So... to wipe clean
leaving around you
all that is seen
whitewashed
and pristine
as a snow-covered valley
surrounding a
large and beautiful lake
where you are
walking along
on this fantasy ...this table flat plane
no footprints
seem to be
left in your wake
if this becomes the moral highground
you choose to take
I wonder what  will be the cost
when you realize that you're lost
or when
in that emersed silence
will you wish you could reverse time
take it all back
once you hear  the sound....of the ice ......go CRAAAAK!?

There was a  time
a few hundred years ago when there was a  story
that most people don't know about the time of Shakespeare
and the theater in the round how they found a way
to make more money
than what was legally bound by means of a childs game tmusical chairs of sorts  
before the game existed
all for profit
all for the people
I'm sure they insisted
no it was not for the people it was a calculated game
of how to blame
others
for failing to receive
their rightful due  
and that's why
the shysters of the day
would sell rich people
one seat
one comfortable place
to watch the show
without any problem
and the poor people
in the cheap seats
they would sell
hundreds more
than were available
why .....?
...why of course its the game of musical chairs
so to speak t
They realized there would be fights  breaking out
with yells and screams
and horrid shouts
that would bring the cops
The  order takers
Order  keepers
to all those fighting
dragging those on the ground away
and then it would be
seats  for all
and more profit
for the ones who did
the deed
of selling the seats  
in planting the seeds
of discontent.
Today there are politician
who choose
to play this game
just the same
as then
as they seek
to overcrowd the poor
  not with cheap seats
but the places
in whicht we live
the inner cities
All iin the same Hope
that the show is for the rich
and the rich will enjoy
all thats there
Prosperity
enough ...hopefully
to pass out the tips
The Leftovers
the bestowed
no one's going to listen
to the poor
the disenchanted
he angry ones
who paid dearly for nothing who got everything
they deserved
according to the ones
who served
those who they believed were worthy people
were the ones ...
....who had power
the  ones who could help them
never realizeing
that they too
were sitting in the cheap seats
you  do ...you get what you pay for
and  you will  pay what you got.
Adam was just dust until he was formed and only by the Breath of life did he become a living soul.

someday
I will lay down
forever
but till then
I will endeavor ...to be whatever I can be

yes it's me
who will sing songs
of Glory
I will paint
pictures
of stories

I will write words
that
bring people together
and I... will
act out scenes
that will forever
be
in
your dreams

because I am
everything
that you are

and I am more
than you
ever believed
that
you could be
because
I
am
only
a thought
passing by

so  you
must
realize
that no one
is not
who you are

you are someone
worth
getting to know

you are something
that is indescribable
you are the dew
covered
new rose
on a beautful
summer morn

you are
the magical sound
of a baby's first cry
after
being born

you will never fade
from
every impression
you've ever made
because you...
you ...my
beautiful
morning dove

are ....love !

I'm on the border
of insanity
peering into the void
of infinity
wondering what is to be
my destiny

distant Rider on the Open Range
I see him clearly
I feel so strange
Vision circle inside
and it seems ....
...I'm along for the ride
Restless rider -death defier always on the run
mystifier
with a deep desire
to out shine the sun
his race
has just begun
jump the gun
jump the gun
Trails of dust in the desert sky
fire -eyed Riders going by
shut your doors
**** the Lights
theres a demon  
on the run tonight
Run  
the hounds of hell
are on your trail
and they're
never going to let you go
Never Gonna Let You Go

For many people
the idea of changing their life
means turning the corner
to me right now
it's the idea of turning around
going back down the trail
of life created
things that are related
things not finished
clear the path
of. all half finshed
left undone.
examine any sad ones
to see
If there are any
really bad ones
I should be ashamed of
I hope not
but you never know
when you look at things from
a different perspective
if I could change anything about my life
right now
by the snap of a finger
it would be ...
...my lust for money
or love of money
for you see.....
... I've never had any
money
or Love of Money  
to some it may seem funny but all I've ever wanted
to do in life was create anyone who does relate
can understand
how something appearing from nothing
will bring your spirits higher than any drug ever could without the side effects
just good
yet there comes a time
when reality has to reach in have to sit yourself down
make yourself think
I've got to buckle down
I have no security
I had nothing to assure
that i won't become
a burden for someone else should something sad happen to me
not allow me to be
able to care for myself
that's a hard hard balancing wire
to be on with no desire
for any such thing
to ever happen ...but ..yeah

I have no answer
knowing only that
the question exists
all wrapped up now
within
this thought
with the hope that
someday
a time will come
that I can read it over
once again
to  realize
it made a difference...or ....
that it didn't.
and that my friends is.... my greatest fear and...
my greatest hope.

Deep in the corner
Of that closet I've neglected
I've finally traveled far enough
to feel as if I am protected
              FROM.....
Whatever I may find
that might devastate my mind
Afflicting me with deep regrets
collecting all my unpaid debts
Leaving me destitute
all the while just hanging out
Among or in the pocket of
          some old suit
Waiting for that day
when I would open up the door and say
    TODAY I'm going in
All the way back to where it did begin
making some space for what may come
Start a different beat on my drum
Should have done it years ago
Yet somehow I always found
Ways to always get around
finding out what I didn't
didn't want to know
Didn't want to see
Didn't want to find
Any long forgotten memory
way back in the corner
of that cluttered closet floor
Or even some old scarf
That lingers with how she used to smell
          I'm well....so....
Today is that day
I am going in
I've been working out
Training for this bout
So I opened up the door
and in the end all I found
was an old valentines
          chocolate box
Empty..., except for....
..,.the same halves
of 2 broken keys
and a note that read
These once opened up
our first front door...and so much more
now the locks are changed
as life has re-arranged
These 2 broken keys
Are identical and just to keep
for  reminding you
that the door...
....cannot
be opened anymore        
           So no regrets....
for any haven't yet  
or should have said!
You once told me
If you could control time
then you would bend...
....our first few years
      into a loop
To live it over again and again
But baby all that would do
Is create a middle
When the beginning meets it's end
And time does that anyway...
and sometimes.......it doesn't matter.... what we do or say .
So be happy!

like a broken record
that just keeps going round
with that clicking sound
to keep me awake
even when I am asleep
And I keep slamming shut
windows and doors
in vain attempt to keep out
all the what ifs and why fors
yet even with my eyes shut
they still seem to slip in
like the wind
as it whistles through cracks
in the walls
of my broken realities
my regrets become the casualties
of a war torn mind
and its shattered landscape
of bombed out dreams
surrounding me like a flooded field
of all the lost causes
I let slip away
replaced by the empty promises
that I allowed to stay
easier to pretend
than to defend
that it was not me
that was there
while anyone could see the truth
that has burnt itself
across the vast emptiness
of my hollowed eyes
to be seen
even when my eyes are closed
and like a broken record
that just keeps going round
making that clicking sound
keeping me awake
even when I am asleep
surrounding me
like a flooded field
of all the lost causes
i let slip away
to be replaced by empty promises
That allow me to stay.

So much hope held hostage
by halidom forces
chills the blood
That pulsates and courses
Through
the currents of life
as we subject ourselves
to astralis forces
To create excuses or hope
In lives so fleeting
Among those nocturnal dreams
That always seems
to conjure selcouth reasons
Mysteries we fear
Like gargoyles about to pounce
Any time you are near
And yet you know they are static fixtures of their domicile
Not some archangel in their power
for they
like all Earthly things
Are subjected to an aeolean fate
that eventually will subdue
While far down below
we seek to serry ourselves
Against the fears inside
by non-symmetrical alliances
non - starters for so many "enlightening" humans
I think not
For those fears that we trust
are often all that we remember
Not all that we forgot
no power assumes
To consume... except the ones we've misjudged
Always trust oneself !

I wouldn't take it so hard

If the Atm kept my card

I've never stood in suspense

Wondering if it would dispense

Some cash needed at 3 am

In fear that makes you shiver

That's so stupid to not know

Someone who will front and deliver

No i never have had an atm problem

And to you that may sound funny

But i would never do that on account

Of my account ain't never got no money.

Not since i quit being a nice guy , a giver

Who came by at 3 am to front and deliver!

Maybe ... D democracies
should be seen
like starting the work day
outside in the cold
and finding
only two left hand gloves
sure
they will work
a little bit discomforting
not at all
the enjoyment
one of each would bring
but that's the thing
it's not what you get used to
that the power should come
it's that should be ...
Far and Away
down the list
of the things
in memory
that you might honor
not as one of the things ...
of those things ....
you simply dismissed!.

They have
such heavy reliance
on compliance
that they have come..
to believe
it is a science
a simple formula
little of this little of that
and it's all done
in seconds flat
but when...
.... someone reacts
in
a non assuming way
definitely the lab explodes
and everything is gone
their oath their civil codes
they will drop the pretense
of them believing in
American values
their eyes turned cold
and their shoulders tense
they then will resort
to lies and abuse
with all those watching
without seeing a thing
until Hands-On
comes into play
they will then have one big
then they will all have one
they will have one
and do they know
that there was no excuse
for the escalation
then together
they will
bang holes in the Constitution trampling on the Bill of Rights
Anytime a citizen still  has faith
in the  institution
doesn't realize it's the truth ..
. they seek to indict.

What values
be exquisite
when really is it
more
merely something
of a misdirection
a tentative connection
along lifes Trail
when no introspection
beyond the surface is seen
is not
any kind of true reflection
if life is only seen
like some valued brand
of clothing worn
pristine or torn
deem no referral
in seeking resolution
some guaranteed solution
with every confidence
paying for some
applied extention
as a warranty against
wear and tear
if this be your evaluation
uplifting spirits
against
downward directions
all due
to those surface reflections  
then that may
just be
that in the end
there be nothing to repair
nothing to mend
nothing to see
for eternity
if you have no value
in your own reflections

Sometimes.....
... the shortest way back
is the longest way round
sometimes ...
the price of success is that
to which we find ourselves bound
sometimes ...
the things that we've lost
were those things we never found sometimes ...the way....
..... to Rise Above It All
is to ALWAYS
keep.our feet on the ground

All human Frailty
Becomes manifest by extension whenever obligation
turns aberration
By way of
" I guess I forgot to mention"
giving halt
to all
default...
power sources
involved in the Ascension
whereas  before hand
they might stand
as some slight
unintended redactions
Unfortunately
Now tosses doubts
into even
those best of intentions
where a simple word mistake
WIll often dictate
a change in course
A new Direction
simply by means of a tone or inflection

Although it's not
because
of something  one
Neglected to mention
but by the tack we take....
..
Or didn't take
By Tone or inflection
that turns
Some words
into that double edge blade
of apprehension
  Whereas
one can understand full well
what you read
With full apprehension and comprehension
Or you can be caught- arrested
By anxiety, misunderstandings
or fear
Simply by how you apply
according to each edge of the blade
and how you accord each one
Apportioning
a value
according to the power
granted to each
.

"According to some- to whom I have great Accord
The View ...
that the sunset affords
from the rooftop Terrace....
is something
that we cannot afford .....
....to miss"
..

Ain't got the time
To explain anymore
Where I will be....when
I exit through that door

Its' not for you to care about
So go ahead  scream and shout

   I learned to not listen a long time ago
  When it turned out that you were not somebody that I used to know
But now I am afraid that I'll end up doing the same
thing to me
and then who the hell would I have to blame


I won't let that be my fate
But I got this feeling that
      I've waited too late
To draw the line that can separate
to draw the line that can separate
who I once was and who I am today

Implicate-evaporate
  Hesitate ...
...till you replicate
One To stay and one to go
One to think  
And one to know

We won't be able to cooperate
  Nor will we be able to collaborate
  Just another dead soldier they choose to decorate
And the next time we see me will be when we open up the crate
And that is
Way way too late to change my fate

I'm going where I'm going when I exit out that door
And where I'll be is...
just not for..
...you to know

But I just got to go...I got to
While there's even a chance

I would be remiss
in not admitting this
I am not
the antecedent
antithesis
of all that forms
my being
from feeling to failings
Loves or loves lost
cheap victories that came at such a high cost
people remembered
and those that did fade
debt owed to friends
that never were paid
Things I've learned
passed up or passed on
creating value earned
or cheap victories won
That I really lost
Because they came
at such a high cost
when i should have
sat down and shut up
or times that i sat out
when I should have
stood up or stepped in
just like those places
ive said that ive been
that i only passed through
passed by, over, around or up yet believe ive been to
So with all this said
How do i know i am not
the antecedent
antithesis
of all these
from which i am formed?
Simple answer is : Because
I grew once i knew I was reformed.

Born into
a dying moment
dry breathing
and distant sounds
the Echoplex
of stacatto reverberations
as Causeless care
is Shuffled lightly
each dealt
a sovereign play
of words - deeds
becoming seeds
planted
below
the Flatline screen
the rooted vein
of blood -fed
abberations
averted versions
by abbrogated
participation
in colluded
Instituted falsification
declarations
leaving each one
only the thinnest
of self- satisfying sanctuary
within
those deepest recesses
of absolution
that place
that never sees no sun
rooted deep
entangled
by rote remote repetition  until received - until believed there was nothing... Nothing nothing ... nothing we could have done.

The light strains in vain
to maintain
some distance from the stain
and does so without hope
to win this battle waged
for times eternal
it tries ,denies,
yet nothing
buys
what lies... beyond
the boundaries pre-subscribed
to which each must abide
as shadows grow
and darkness drops
over the land and souls
humans have learned
to push back
by flickering flame
and ever present
incandescent
A tribute to our ability
To find solutions
through evolutions
of failures facts and follies
yet we find a will and way
to stay
a tentative yet relative
hold upon the control
of power over dark and light
except within
the hearts of them
That allow only darkness
to permeate their soul
as it takes a bitter toll

,A whisper of rain
washed over my skin
marooning me upon
those memories again
that often plants itself
like a garden of green
with its soft pink aura
standing out and for
all beauty of nature
ive know and ive seen
and then the breeze
caresses my flesh
with the softness of a lovers kiss
or maybe even
a slight bit less
like a tenderest of touch
a tender caress
and i watch the redbird
whos song i had heard
but till now  
had  remained
unseen
rushing away
ahead of the rain
while i choose to be
taken away
as  i choose to remain
to let it wash clean
any blues
within
far  away
to know i still feel
as the warm summer
droplets arrive
to know I am blessed
and to know i am alive

Why do people always want to start a fight
,when all you trying to do is help them
see the light
You don't want to see Them Stumbling around
Falling down
Landing on what the dog left On The ground
It's like they're alt saying
if you don't believe
what I believe
you cannot help me ,to even live
and that's hard to conceive When it comes to dying
They continue trying
Tightly packed  as they Interact And it's a sad fact
what the nurse said on TV
just  the other day
Sometimes it's just too hard
to hear the last words
They ever say
in that Breathless Rasp
Between it and that final gasp Kovid/ Corona it doesn't exist I'll be fine they
do insist
And that's when lighted eyes  Dim
And the heart monitor goes flat
You're not fine
I just don't understand why people don't see this
As a sign ... Like Perhaps Stop!
Just stop !

I feel as if the air is lighter, the nights are more inviting, the mood of those strangers we smile at -with eyes alone,- more receptive, like one of those spring mornings that is in the process of, or has just shaken off the crisp cool mantle of wet fog, to leave the ground saturated in the sound deadening effect [that] - in those rare moments- we can pause, enjoy and savor; before stepping back onto the conveyor belt of life ( modern humans lot), with the still lingering sounds of unseen birds singing to our souls from the bluer skies, those happier trees and the proudly more secure rooftops that seem to have suddenly regained the pride of being things of value, things of worth, those things  which I find absolutely worthy of rejoicing  ...like at no other time in my 2/3 century of living on this great planet!

I don't have no love to share anymore
you took it all with you
when you walked out the door
now you're back knocking
wanting me open up
to let you back in
what makes you think
that I do that when
I don't know who
it is out past that door
besides I don't even live
I don't live there anymore
you took all of me away
when you wen......anyway
like I say
I don't have any no love
to share...no more !

It is an ineffable challenge
to render...
any "real"
all imbuing
explanation
as to why
perpetuation
seems the only Quest
for those who have regressed deigning to live with less
than the full potential
that seems so essential
to the human Condition
yet so many push on
Sans any sign of contrition
indeed
they seem impervious
to any knowledge of...
their obsequious subservience adhering to so abhorrent a view that's so often of late
It seems....
as if it deems
A need to elevate, perpetrate instalate to dictate
perpetuate the growing hate
of a monger
that should no longer be relevant were it not
for the egregious deception
by those who believe
Our new starting point
will be the Inception....
.. by their god-given right
to appoint
to anoint
a criminal, a traitor,
A would be fascist dictator
their own fearless leader
that feckless man
who could not care less
about making America great
now
or in the future
or at all
certainly not every again
never again!!
NO ! Never again!

Scrolling along
My finger on high
Sudden stop scrolling back
To see what I just went by

A baby in a high chair
18 months - maybe ....a tater tot
On the end of a fork
.....dancing chaotic
Seeking to aim at the right spot
First thought I had was IDK
Young for a fork but who knows
Having a little trouble -and I
I start to think cute, and then froze....
...the fork she was using was between her toes
Then I get confused inside of myself
I realize it may be sad what I just said
I know that it's cute she's a little doll
With a happiness bright lit so easily seen
I battle myself as i get stuck between
Cute and/or tragic.cute or tragic ...
Neither feels natural as i try them on
So in compassionate relief I to myself
As i take in a wider view and thought .

When I reach out for you
And you're not there
I feel myself shrinking ...sinking
Into a deep abyss

When I turn to say something to you
But you're not there to hear
I feel myself falling - calling
Out to the one I miss

I REALLY DO MISS OUR
         MISSING 51st    
state, now that its gone...
  I realize how beautiful
  the state of bliss really was!

when I was a clock
you were too slow
to keep
up with me
when I was a wheel
I was always around
but you always seemed content just to  watch me roll on by
when I was a cloud..
... white or gray
It  never seemed
to matter much ....to you
either way
when I was a question
you had no answers
when you had answers
I had no question
That when I was a nightmare
, You always remained a dream
When I was an open book
you made it easy
to always turn the page
and when I'd  fear
what I might find there
it seemed like you
would always skip ahead
making sure
my post is clear... making sure
that my ghosts weren't there !!

When I was a clock
you were too slow
to keep up with me
now that I'm an old man
I walk slower much slower now While  you could run so far ahead but, you're always there
holding my hand ....holding
my hand instead !

pay no heed to the frustrated
invalidated
potentially addlepated
irritating convoluted
not even amplituded
but hell bent on clogging up
Your emotions, your reactions
your common sense
and your precious time
It's just that
they are a little bit
easier to see
by over looking the mask
Behold we have reached the dawn
Of the... Subliminal mime!

If it is - as they say
then GOD slammed
a couple of doors - in my face
yesterday
It wasn't like I had not seen
that long haulway
set out before me
door after door...
...wide open - just as far
As I could see

So...maybe...just maybe
I was or chose to be
unaware...as they
began to slowly close

As I sailed along oblivious
to what was - not...
..to what I miss
and then...BLAM
so quick the second
that I never heard it slam
what with my momentum
roaring at full hum

I knew right then
that my...
just now ex-friend
had created a wound
believed to be one
that would never mend
which was...
at that juncture
very much right

Right....no!NO! wrong!
Right then
was that time to stop and think
About the depths
I was or was not
willing
to allow myself to sink!


" You Know," I said " Its Been In
Your Head...from the moment!"

That moment - months ago
when that bridge was crossed
Set ablaze - burned to a crisp
no way back
across the divide
me
on one side
looking back
Across that void
regretfully seeing
the uttered...not muttered
words that I had heard
and wishing right then
that that moment
had never occurred!

As two white men we be
talking about BLM
as suddenly one would decide,
to deride , not implied
but simply replied
"But it's not the right time!!!"

I sat there agape
repulsed...
as if hearing
fingernails scrape
across a chunk of slate
married to an indigenous
blessed with beautiful indigenous offspring
who carried that native appeal
grandchildren as well- wait....WAIT!!

I wanted to scream "Are you MAD- RRRrrr Uuuuuu InSANE?

With motors overheating
I loosed that string
let that hot-air balloon
rise up and steadily drift away
carrying off a friendship ( of sorts )
a favor in the act
where wise men stop
to think..instead of react!

into the wind I watched it sail
as I stepped gracefully
back from the rail
Stopping dead in my tracks

So...was I surprised
as I watched...
... those doors
SlaMMing shut
so abruptly
amid today's nevermores?
YES! ...sort of
I guess you might say
but I pulled up my anchor
set sail on calm waters
Jettisoning my rancor
starting with reasoning
seasoning
tamping down any hot embers
"Small fish of'n ave big tales!"
I read on a strangers porch
just today along my travails
My mind...
..suddenly remembers!

At first just a smallest of smiles
existed on my unwilling face
Before the laughter erupted
washing away all of it away...
...without leaving a trace!

   $mall price to be paying
that bridge so selfishly ignored
which turns out - as you knew
t'was not a payment...you willingly could afford!!

Then that breeze
blew over me..
...refreshingly cool/
replenishing me
more than I believed
was my right to be hopin'

A bestgone friend
a few hundred lost
so much was gained
than was to be lost
when all those windows did suddenly open!

That is today's truth...
...my reality lesson.

peace!!