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I'm testing out the boundaries of the pitches I can make
The cacophonic melodies are keeping me awake
And if I had control of what I ever heard before
The noise I hear today is never welcome anymore
My ear is now an oracle I cannot comprehend
The skin around a part of me I verily offend
Repeatedly defying every thought I ever had
I wonder if I'll realize the moment I go mad
If I'm not always with you, you will lose me to myself
I'll wander off and far away from everybody else
And if you try to find me when you see that I am gone
Remembering my face will only further lead you on

When all of me acknowledges the foreign and the known
I'll dip my feet in oil, light a match and let it go
The fire on my skin will not be hot enough to fear
I'll watch you watching me until I have to disappear
when I'm not where you are
I'm eaten up by everything that gathers on my skin
The taste becomes familiar just before it settles in
And as my concentration goes from weak to weaker still
I foot the path ahead of me but cannot find the will
To be another passerby to everything I see
Avoid the one who made it near impossible to leave
Undress me with your subtleties before I walk away
Before I tell you all the things you never thought I'd say
My lips are moving faster than my body ever could
A race upon the bone along the back of where I stood
sometimes we carry something heavier than ourselves
 Jul 2014 Julie Butler
MBishop
Hello / goodbye
bent on / goodnight
Can't sleep / just cry
My dreams / I die
Don't live / survive
Im losing / the fight
Demons / unite
Take over / my mind
Can't see / I'm blind.
Get in / and drive
Away / behind
we're out / of time
People / they try
They ask / I lie
They hear / they buy
While I / stand by
And whisper / **"I'm fine"
 Jun 2014 Julie Butler
Miira
Stretch marks.
  Cellulite.
    Scales.

Want.
  Pretty  

Reflection,
  Is that really me?

Knife.
  Shredder.
    Fats be gone.
      For the better.

Please?
trigger warning
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