It's been so long since I put pen to paper
Told the tales of my latest greatest caper
Road the rails wherever, climbed a skyscraper
Sailed into the wind or turned into vapor

I dream of love as I sail the seas
seeking loves shelter finding no peace
battered and torn doing as I please
if love is a sickness I want that disease

Once planted thoughts grow.
Some becomes dreams,
some become visions of greatness.
Some transcend the barriers of reason
eluding logic,
sidestepping rationality,
Becoming living entities.
and building worlds around them.

Life was simpler in times antebellum
now volumes take ****** to cope.
As the tick tocking of the pendulum,
curriculums of war, leaves us without hope.

You can take what I say “*** grano salis”
simply pabulum for thought you see.
From my inner most sanctum, I tell you this,
it matters not what you think about me.

So lead with your best take a shot on a lark
Forever is closing in fast
If your lucky your thoughts may flicker and spark
Then come to fruition at last

Blinded by brilliant displays of illusion
like painted windows peering into emptiness
as a mind unfurls in the expanses of eternity

Chattering along a path to inner freedom
As dandelions float on wisps of thought
gently rocking paradoxical lives of leisure

While the intentions of a charismatic dream
drift quietly down to where shadows meet in darkness
at high noon on soap boxes to mourn the setting sun

Ambiguity buried behind a veil of mindlessness
erupting from a frenzied denial of truth, slapped in the faces
of the holier than thou as they pray for lost souls

Living within self inspired comas of deception
where vague truths knock daily on open doors
that lead to nothingness, where no one's home

Carry me, far far away
to the places in my dreams.
Reality’s just somewhere to visit
where nothing is, as it seems

darkness, the unlight
whats left when light is gone
what was before it came
it is not made it simply is

light can only pierce the darkness
but darkness is everywhere
the moon and stars are but lighthouses
beacons in the night

only on earth do darkness and light
appear to be equals
and only on earth is darkness seen as the evil side
but not in the reality of the universe

when the sun eventually burns out there will be darkness
when all else ceases there will be darkness
nothing can stop it
for it is its own source
and feeds upon itself

it is the alpha and the omega of natural evolution
it is the sea from which came the light
the fertile breeding ground of the universe
the womb that gave us life
and when life ends it is the welcome home

the calm before the storm that is life
and the tranquility when it ends

You placed land mines,
put up walls,
and strung barbed wire
around the path
to your heart.
Closed and locked
the doors
and windows
to your soul.
Leaving us
but one road to travel
in opposite directions.

I don’t believe I’ll believe in anything any more

Not in love
Not in reason
Not in faith
Only treason

Not in the hate I’ve seen in your heart
Not in the love we’ve lost
Not in the seasons of time gone by

And not in tears
Bitter sweet in your eyes

For you’ve taken from me all I believed in

Took my love
Took my reason
Took my faith
With your treason

Showed me the bitterness and hatred
Took away the seasons
All of my reasons for believing

In living
In loving
In giving
In eternity

You don't get to be who you are without practice
repetition is how you learn to do things
So take note and strive to repeat the good things
Until they take root in your soul and make you whole

If only I had had that wisdom to see
that it takes as long to lose as it does to gain
for every evil in me that took years to grow
there will be years of tiny adjustments to make,
and tiny steps to take to undo the damage
I hope I live long enough to die a better man

I used to play the zither
Upon it my hands would slither
I was young, supple and lither
Till the day old age came hither
My mind went all a dither
My body began to wither
And although I am still behither
My soul is reaching out thither

I'm so tired
In this cage
Life admired
Can't engage

Wasting away
Pitiful sorrow
Praying today
For life tomorrow

My brother once asked me this question
But by the time I knew the answer,
he was gone

What’s left
When life, is cherished no longer
and you can’t see through the tears
What’s left
when your tired of elusive happiness
and searching for truth without fears

There was a time I thought I knew,
what this life was all about
And if you asked me, I could tell you
What to look for along the route
But that time for me is now long gone
And memories once strong have faded
Now I see life through eyes of death
My conviction’s gone sour, I’m jaded

What’s left
When you’ve put the gun to your head
And consciously made your decision
What’s left
When your finger is upon death’s trigger
And there’s no turning back, no remission
What’s left
When you’re gone

Only now dear brother is the answer so painfully clear

Holes

A hole in your head
A hole in our lives
A hole in our hearts
And
A hole in the ground

Entertaining life’s illusions
he dances upon the leaves
that the winds of change have piled
neatly beneath a Harvest Moon.

Eclipsed by the heart of this soulless scarecrow
who stands alone in his field of dreams
awaiting the plows that will rebuild
his vision’s of tomorrow.

Soaring beyond our own infinite dreams
Plotting universal conceptual themes
Forward nor backwards nor up and or down
Gravity, it’s holding us down to this ground

A stitch in time passes, through folded space
that can take us away, back to a place.
Where unseen strings are rings that appear,
will defy all logic for many a year

Riding a rift through spaces of time,
reflecting on future visions refined.
Seeking dimensional barriers to wake,
eleven it seem’s, the number to make

Eyes closed, imagining, dreaming
Eyes open, materializing realizations
Heart closed, empty and cold
Heart open, warm and full
Mind closed, stagnating and lost
Mind open, expanding the universe
Hands closed, denying uninviting
Hands open, accepting and giving
Arms closed, withdrawn, uneasy
Arms open, welcoming life and love

It’s raining and we’re laying face to face
In the clubhouse where our sweet, sweet love was made
A private universe created in this space
A light so bright it could not ever fade

When the summer turns to fall
I get these feelings, and recall
All the times love’s past me by
And I let it go with just a sigh…

A poet searches
thru the light to find.
Where inspiration lives.
Where the words
are the visions of dreams
that flow
thru his soul
and take him with.
To where it is his heart does live
and his spirit guides his sight.
Flowing from within
directing his pen,
in endless streams of delight.

A blind man searches
thru the night to see.
His dreams his only vision
And the only light
he’s ever seen,
knowing only intuition.
If he were to paint a picture
what a wonder it would be.
From his spirit it’d
have to flow,
and be, guided by his dreams.
Abstract visions of places
that pass in lighted streams.
Wondrous visions of beauty
he’s never had sight to’ve  seen.

When you try to go
to sleep at night and simply
cannot stop your brain

And your thoughts they can’t
be turned off and you just know
you’re going insane

When you lay your head
upon your pillow at night
and can’t find your dreams

And your world crumbles
on a daily-basis and
life’s not what it seems

When your thirst for life
has been so long forgotten
you no longer care

And wallowing in
pools of your own self pity
is your only fare

When you have known it
and can surely comprehend
a mans frustrations

Then you have found it
the misereality
congratulations

Pain is strong
But I am stronger
It's been too long
But I'll last longer

Where the hell is the door
I’ve got to get out of here
Oh no…no….it can’t be
there really is no way out
Everything is in the in,
I ran out of my house
But was still in the yard
I got out of my car
But was still in the lot
Going out of my mind
But still in my body
Perhaps when I die
They’ll bury me outside of the box
Yea that’s it……no wait,
that won’t work either
I’ll still be in the ground

Within the glow of her half breed heart
she found enough pieces of herself to go on.
While out in the real world time stood still,
waiting for her, yet never looking back

Winter would weep frozen tears before the thawing of spring,
Only then could she emerge from beneath its shimmering coat.

And though yet another season was within her sight
she paled in remorse over past desertions of faith.
If she’d only had the wisdom that is now awakened in her
as she embarked on her journey into that cold, cold night.

Her thoughts her only friend and yet still they pained
with the frostbitten air of her faith’s retaliatory wrath.

On into the night she crept silent amongst the spirits,
the only true guides left for her to follow without worry.
Her own tears now lay in frozen streaks across her face.
Frantically she tries to brush them away, but they cut her.

Bright red flowing life running down painting the snow,
covering the earth, she was leaving with her living memory.

Not much longer could she wait for the spirits to find her again,
to heal her wounds and carry her into a new tomorrow.
She falls to the ground curling herself up into a ball as the last
drops of her mortal life run into the snow. She dies.

The world was silent, nothing not even the wind spoke.
The ice melted, the rivers thawed and the trees lifted.

As spring ignited from out of the life she had left behind,
her beauty was reflected throughout every living thing.
She had given herself back to the earth for renewal,
her spirit now free to roam with the spirits and guide others.

Her wounds no longer capable of holding her back, she flew
out into the dawn of a new day on her new wings of light.

Creativity is gathered
in the sails of our mind
where the universe
flows through us
and our thoughts collect

If we simply open our sails
the winds of creation
will take us where they may.

But our sails are fragile,
if we try too hard,
to force our thoughts
they will rip holes through the fabric
and the winds of creation
will pass right through,

and take us nowhere

Dream
Spanning between two points of darkness
Eyes open
Floating on streams of light

Nightmare
Spanning between two points of darkness
Eyes closed
Staring into the darkness

Life
Spanning between two points in time
Eyes open
Navigating streams of light

Death
Spanning between two points of life
Eyes closed
Resting for the next adventure

She was alive with the vibrant colors
of the Indian dress she wore.
Light danced around her,
its brilliance refracted in her eyes.

Translucent beams of screaming color
poured out from her soul,
flowed onto her canvas,
in the shapes of her visions divine.

The artist that was always within her
found a tempting muse,
as a scene unfolded,
echoed by the gentle strokes of her brush.

Light pouring through the evening clouds
as a summer rain ends.
A rainbow takes its place
atop a setting sun masterpiece of a sky

What the it
Holy it
Cut the it
What the it
Some people choose to eat it and cry
Some need to it before they can fly
Some like to roll in it
Or be in a heap of it
Though none of them can take it
Most like to give it
Some of them come up smelling like roses
After stepping in it
Some smell like it all the time
Some people I know can eat it and die
And this is certainly full of it

Drifting away
lost in cyberspace.
No longer a survivor
of this human race.
Scattered thru time
between dark and light.
A magnificent web
spirals into the night

My opponent is tiring
as I move in for the ****
Forthcoming evil
Lurking here still
From behind the walls
that confine the night
Everyone flickers
and goes out
thru the light

All my life the thought of you has led me upwards
The trail sometimes so hard to travel I’d almost give up
But I always managed to just make it to the next plateau.

Never did you lend a hand or reach out to catch me as I fell,
yet still I went on, enduring the hardships of my chosen path
and reaping the fruits of my labor, sewn along the way.

With each new level I would look over the last contemplation.
And think to myself there could be no higher ground
Then the fog would clear and another tier would come into view.

Again, I would load up my family and all our worldly possessions
and drag them kicking and screaming upwards, forever upwards
to this place I knew had to exist, our place at the top of it all.

I lost my wife on one leg of my journey, the kids on another
and somewhere along the way I was relieved of my possessions,
but I made it to the top of my mountain.

Stopping to catch my breath, I looked out over my world,
but I could see nothing. The clouds blocked my view to all below me.
I could see only the heavens and the small point of land beneath my feet.

In that instant, I knew. Life is not lived, from the top down.
Everything I am or I ever was, was behind me beneath the clouds
that lay so thick that I could not see the path from which I had come.

And there in that moment of realization and frustration you appeared to me.
Holding out your hand, beckoning me to step out away from known ground,
to take a leap of faith and trust that you would not let me fall.

My mind flashed back to all the times I needed you and you weren’t there.
Why now should I believe that you wouldn’t again just let me fall?
Perhaps the thin air at the top was causing me to hallucinate.

No, I decided, you couldn’t be trusted and I turned away from you.
In my haste I stumbled, and found myself falling away from your direction.
I fell through the clouds and I saw paths I had followed to the top.

I saw my children and my wife, I saw my belongings, all the things
that had been good in my life flashed before my eyes as I fell, downward.
I fell for what seemed like forever, and somewhere during my fall, I fell asleep.

And while I was sleeping, I dreamt that everything I was, was fading away
I no longer remembered how my journey to the top started, and now, I can almost remember where it ended, no, what was I thinking of…….I can’t remem…….

Hey! I just realized I’m awake, and I am looking into the eyes of the most beautiful
creature I have ever seen, smiling eyes that know me, and love me.
Eyes that draw my attention from all else, a soft voice so soothing.  

Suddenly it’s very noisy and there are more eyes, looking at me, smiling happy eyes. I am overwhelmed and I start to cry, feeling the warmth of flesh on my face, there’s something in my mouth and it’s tasty and fulfilling,

I stop crying and open my eyes again, looking up into those wonderful eyes that love me.

I guess you did catch me after all.

Alone, within these concave walls
that hold me from floating out of my mind
into space, diluted in a universal pool
of infinite perception.

I long for someone to knock on my door,
awaken me from this dreamless slumber
from where I cannot remember that
which came before I fell, did I fall?

I have drifted, bouncing off these same
gray walls of nothingness for so long
I can recall no more than a faint
remembrance of what came before.

Am I destined to continue circling
in an upward spiral, with each pass
bringing me further from the destination
I had aspired to achieve, in futility?

Looking downward from above
at my lifeless temple, it is all so clear.
The one, I thought I knew is gone.
Life, as I knew it, is no more.

Yet here I am!

We were talking by the fire
about the silence between us.

How we’ve used it to push each other
farther away,
yet now, closer somehow.

So funny we are

We fixed up our house
and put it up for sale
only to find
how much we love it here

It’s kind of like us you know.
We patched ourselves up,
just enough to be civil
and to decide
how we should end it.

And somewhere along the way
found each other again.

Here in this house.
Amongst the painting
and the fixing up
and the warmth of the fire,
we talked
until there was silence no more.

The subject of this email is as usual... subjective! Not sure there is actually a subject involved? I mean if I just ramble on about any old thing that crosses my mind, how would that be described as a subject. I submit that the "subject" line of all emails should be moved to the end of an email! That way we would have a better grasp of what the subject of the email truly is.

Better yet it should automatically prompt you to go to the subject line when you click "send" to fill in at that time. Maybe the email program should even give samples of possible subject lines based on google's interpretation of what you have typed in the body of the email. Better yet that program should just run automatically and impose a subject line based on the information in the message body after it is run through several psychiatric data bases and analyzed and a consensus has been reached...

Hmmm... Now I'm thinking that there should be a mind to keyboard interface so we can do away with all this time-consuming typing! And while we're at it why not add a chip in our brains that thinks for us and sends the data it receives directly to the keyboard interface... I mean think of all the time we would save not having to think any more!

Why stop there? We can also add emotion chips so that when we are letting our thinking chip talk for us we can also have the emotions that our emotion chip thinks we should be feeling automatically inserted into the email with the capability of it being felt by the emotion chip in the person whose thinking and keyboard interface chips are perusing the email written by our thinking and keyboard interface chips.

Ooooh now I'm really thinking... why not install mini SD drives in our brains so we can change the way we feel by simply inserting a new SD card? That way if we happen to read one of the emails thought out by our thinking chip, written by our keyboard interface chip, analyzed and consented to by the psychiatric data bases and given a subject and we decide that we want to change the way it is perceived by the thinking chip of the recipient we can simply insert a different emotion SD card into our SD drive and have those new emotions embedded directly into the email!

***! This is genius! Imagine the time we could save! I could just go on and on with this! The applications are limitless. Why hasn't someone thought of this before? Oh wait, what am I thinking... this is old news. This is called brainwashing and the government and every major company in the world has been doing it since the dawn of capitalism!

I'm going to stop now because I am no longer sure if the words I write are my own, or if they are just a bunch of noise created by the humm of all the post hypnotic suggestive clutter in my brain from years and years of commercial TV and slick politician abuse.

That's all I have time for this morning. I apologize in retrospect for the emotional agony I have put your brain through while reading this inane banter...

Insatiable insanity,
left wing, right foot, home.
Rectangular, triangular,
incapably prone.

Unable stigmatically,
invariably drone.
Whimsical fanatical,
address unknown

Sounds can describe
the words they convey.
Tranquil decisions can blur,
but do they.

Utter a word
to see what you say,
say what you see,
then be what you may.

Describe it in detail,
exhale every verb,
catch yourself, let yourself
grade on a curve.

But don’t strain your brain,
if it doesn’t make sense,
just take it all in,
come down off your fence.

Blue sadness drips
from long tired eyes,

her star weeps alone
filling entire oceans

with the salt of life
lived not living, but

dangling from strings,
a marionette's fate.

Neither forward nor sideways nor up and or down
Its backwards thru past lives a second time around
Touching on vague realities that seem familiar some how
On my way back to the beginning of my here and now

I was whole
I was alone
Moving forward
Out of time
In sequence with all I knew
I knew all
I was whole
I was all I knew

Then there was you
From out of nowhere
A collision
Piercing me
Filling me
With you
A struggle
Not enough room
An explosion
Pieces of me
Pieces of you
Flying through space
Time no longer standing still
Moving forward
As I dance across pieces of you and I
Gathering myself

Sorting out
Me from you
The inner workings
The foundations
The infinite possibilities
The right and the wrong
Left and right
Up and down
Forward
NO... backwards
I must go back
Thru the lives I have lived
The time that’s gone by
Relive the past
One past life at a time
Til I get back to the place
Before there was time
Stop the collision
From re-framing my mind

Imagine running towards a star as it goes Nova
That would be me
The star, the Nova
And you
The cause
My reason