Late at night is when I think
And try to I clear my head
I often stay awake all night
Just laying in my bed

As soon as I get comfy
Thoughts start racing in
I start to question everything
and regret my every sin

At first the thoughts are gentle
Like what will I do tomorrow
But as time crawls by; they escalate
Till I'm drowning in my sorrow

I think of all my failures
Every detail of what I did wrong
After hours of reliving pain
I convince myself I don't belong

I suddenly feel isolated
and like the silence will never end
I feel like I will never escape
There's too much I just can't mend

I feel overpowered and worthless
Like I'll never do anything right
I hide till the world fades away
And I'm awoken by the light

I realize a new day has come
It's time to put on a brave face
I put those negative thoughts away
Until I return to this place

I feel empty inside today
but this is just another day.
yesterday was horrible but
I did lived to see this day.

Tomorrow should be filled
with joy, hope and dreams
but it's still just another day
for me to live one more day.

I accepted yesterday because
I made it through that day.
even though I'm in pain today
I look forward to a better day.

There is no reason for me to
keep thinking about yesterday.
When God is blessing me to live
this day to see a brand new day.

I once read a poem about change.
How we have the ability to change anytime.
How we're the only ones in our way.

But on my path to change, I discovered that I wasn't the only thing in my way.
I discovered that old habits die hard.
I discovered that your old friends won't always take kindly to new friends.
That your best friend can become your worst enemy.

And those things will stop you from changing.

Being afraid of losing the people you know best.
Being afraid of letting new people know the most intimate parts of you.

And while that may seem like you stopping yourself, it isn't.

It's a whole other cavity.
It's fear.
And fear isn't something we can control.
It is however something we can eventually overcome.

You have to overcome all that fear or else your change will just turn into an even worse version of you.

"i've never been this sad before,"
she cries, the tears burning her cheeks like acid
they say words can never hurt you
but she's never been so hurt in her life
she feels the sorrow overflowing in her brain
her lungs
her heart
the shattered glass lays on her floor
as she weeps underneath the sound of a running bath
knocks on the door pierce through the silence
apologies- which real or not- drift through one ear
and out the other
she doesn't want broken promises and meaningless apologies
she wants happiness