Whether you fall in love with a poem or not
greatly depends on how you read it.

Love is the true enemy.
It isn't a soft knock.
It's like a hurricane,
It comes in fast and reckless,
And it leaves just as fast as it came

...

Do you even still love me?
I can't help but think that
maybe we are falling apart,
like the spine of a book.
One that we've read over
a thousand times and gotten bored of
because we know how each other ends
You know that I will smother you
And I know that you will run
And even though I know this
I track down your inky footprints
with my pillow in tow
in hopes that by suffocating you
I will take your breath away
like they do in the movies.
But we are not actors and we read no script
This bleak romantic comedy
seems nothing but a tragedy
for I have nothing romantic or funny to say
all I have is the truth in that
I feel like maybe we made a mistake
So while you place your shoes by the door,
I will sleep with my pillow  on the floor,
waiting for us to lather, rinse, and repeat
the same **** cycle
that never washes clean
Never knowing if you will run away
for good next time
Never knowing if we were fated for others
Is that why you run? To find someone else?
Is that why I push? To put you through hell?
I can't answer these questions
all I know is I'll always have
my pillow

...
maybe I should just smother myself


...

I am not afraid
Of very much
Not because I'm brave
Strong and fearless
But because I am too
Numb to be afraid

I am not afraid
Of very much
But what I am afraid of
I am terrified of

I am not afraid
Of very much
But I am beyond terrified
Of three things
In this life

The first thing being
Falling in love
That does not mean
I am afraid of love
For love is a nice thing
Gentle smiles and
Friendly laughs
That lead to hugs
Kind words
But no kisses
Just loving the other person

Falling in love however
That is a terrifying thing
To crave their company
Every hour of the day
To wish to know
What secrets their
Smiles could hide
The aching need to
Be with them
That terrifies me

The second thing is
That I am afraid
Of being powerless
In all essences
Defenseless
Weak
Unable to stop
Awful, terrible,
Catastrophic things
From happening

The third and last
The greatest fear
I have
Is that I am afraid
Of being alone
It is a crushing
Crippling weight
The weight of that fear

I am afraid of being alone
In both senses
In having no one by
My side
No one out there
In this small-wide world
Who cared
And in being able
To stand in a crowd
With numbers reaching
Ten thousands
Yet no one to
Know my name
Or worse yet
They knew my name
And my story
Yet they didn't care

These three things
Are my three fears
They might be small
At least in number
But they are
Everything

Isn't it funny?
I'm completely numb
And I'm still afraid
Perhaps I fear
My own numbness
Four fears isn't bad
Yet they are awful