I just want to be known
I need to be heard
I just want people to remember my name
I'd love to make a difference
     in at least one person's life
I would like my words to resonate within
         at least one soul
I'd love for my rhymes to be the flow
    in which at least one heart beats
I need my life to mean something
I want my poetry to matter
        To anyone
          To  everyone
              To somebody
   To at least one single person

and everyone says I don't care
while I'm curled in a ball thinking
*what if they don't

I write my name
My label, my identifier
My word, my definer
I write my name
And it looks wrong, outgrown
Do I have the power, the control
The grip
To change it

Get a grip
Stop slipping
State the facts
Stop tripping

You’re 17 and you’re young
You’re 17 and you have metal in your head
You’re 17 and you have metal taste
Stuck on your tongue
Dripping off when you talk
Forming the puddles in which you walk
Pooling in words that burn
They are a curse slipping through the smile
That reaches your eyes
Only because you painted it there

With brown eyes you can't make friends
With brown eyes you cried until you couldn’t
With brown eyes you smile like it’s free
You quit dancing
You quit schooling
You quit pretending
You started pretending

I am not the same as the infant born 17 years ago
I am not the same as the name that they gave me
I am not the same as the others that held my name
I am separate from that title
I am something new, beyond
Something true and someone gone

Scar after scar twinkles in the light
Hair after hair is torn out every night
What do you call a work in progress
Incomplete is not my name
I am not quite obsolete
To many I appear petite
To many I should just retreat
What a privilege to be given something to cling to that you never desired to own
No, rain is not the same as snow

A name is not a name
My name is not my name
It is a label I stole from fame
Nicole Kidman is not my role model
But her role was my model
My mother was her model on set
But this is a stage on which we are players
And I will not give a verse a name that is not of my own creation
I will not credit the broken, glue-coated, splinters of myself
To some foreign and separate person
No, not to someone else

hi,
hello.

You might not know me but, I promise.
I know you.

You are kind but not afraid to be shaken.

You have words that need to be spoken.

You are the universe in motion,
a potion.

Concocted by the mighty hand Himself.
You are here to reveal yourself.

and find self...
all at the same time.

So, hello.

hi.
I couldn't tell you my name. even if I wanted.

And, you don't have to tell me yours...

Cause, I'm sure you don't know either.
But that is why I am here.

Saying these words.
These very rhymes. Because I know you.

I am just a reflection.

Would you mind...
holding up a mirror.

So I can know me too.

He played that guitar
like cupid on a broken heart
or a harmony upon a harp.

The sad instrument wept
his tears unto the dry crowd
and they sighed in saturation.

And once he was drained
of everything he kept contained
they lit their lighters, begging for more.

Alas, he was alive no longer,
and had nothing but great nothings
left to give them.

So they took the silence,
and gave it back to him.

If you accidentally
             fall out of love,
Do you just dive
                back in head first?
           Feet first??
                     Eyes closed???
        Cannon ball????
             Or
Do you walk away
       Cause you can't swim
And you're scared to death
                   of *drowning?????

maybe if I would just quit erasing the lines I type

The thing is, I coud survive without all of you
However, I would have never lived without each of you

CONFIDENCE................
what a wonderful thing,
BUT**
too much of it wouldn't leave
the story as happily ever after

And in the end of the Day nobody knew what battles she's been through

There comes a moment when you want to write about something so beautiful
That it refuses to be transcribed into ink, and you're stuck with only memory

I realized I have a voice
But when I want to speak
You just covered your ears
Why you're making me weak?

You knew I fell down
But when I tried to stand
You asked me, "Why move on?
No one will hold your hand."

You knew I was drowning
But when I tried to swim
You said, "Go back
and be drowned with him!"

You believed in traditions
That can hurt and ****
What is there in the name
That's not worthy to heal?