I am ashamed
At how broken i am.
I apologize
For the amount of stress
I may cause in the midst of your
Efforts of trying to keep me held together.
I apologize
that i continue to fall apart
Before your glue has time to dry.
I apologize
That every time you pick a piece of me up,
Yet another breaks.
I am trying.
You are fixing me slower than i am breaking,
And i am ashamed.
Thank you.
Thank you for not giving up
On a broken piece of nothing.

Broken hearts left behind
Tears flowing like riptides
.
Console your hearts
Pluck out the shooting darts
For at His feet she lays
After a stressful stay
In a world that defines you by your Genotype.
.
The world beyond, we know not
But we know God
And He welcomes you home Tosyn B.


©2018 Busola S. Kolade

Lips as red as wine
Sipping a glass of Merlot
Face in deep concentration
Separating the different ingredients
Brain wrapped in sweet smelling savour
Sip by sip
Glass after glass
Love in every drop.

This feeling I can't let go
My once empty belly, is now full
Full of love.

Trust?
How do you trust someone?
How do you take such heavy risk?
Putting your whole world on hold
Banking on someone's good intentions
And their conscience
Even when you know they are human
And we're inately decietful.
Just how?

Right now I'm afriad
Afraid that I'll loose
Loose it all
All that i invested
Invested in a human
Human like me?

This time, I'll chose to trust.
Or should I?


©2018 Busola S. kolade

I caught a glimpse of those eyes
As I said goodbye
They were dark blue
With a hint of hue
There was no face
Just a mask covered in lace
What a beauty they are
Like gems they are.

To one, goodbye I said
To another my mind lead
Gone to the shadows of the room
Where the walls are covered in brooms
I followed
I followed
The mask lead me
Welcome again, they said to me
A face without the mask, I long to see
But all there was, a reminder of the sea
I followed
I followed

Moving, turning
From corner to corner
Till the mask stopped
So sudden, my heart dropped
Then the mask said to me
Why do you pursue me?
The pleasure of satisfaction, I long for
A beauty to treasure, like never before

I saw a sparkle
Eyes a shining marble
Hands trembling
Feet shuffling
As I drew nearer
That I may see clearer
The face covered in a mask of lace

Take off the mask I must
To see a face I long for, I trust
Ahead lay my task
To set free a face
Trapped in the mask
A mask covered in lace.


© 2016 Busola S. Kolade

Tell me,
How does one put thoughts into words?
How do you say exactly what you think
Without a fear for what comes afterwards?
And then blink,
Like its no big deal
Like your heart doesn't beat really fast
Like mine does,
Even though it'll never last.
...

If only I could
Say all the things I should
Then I will,
And leave you with the pill.
...

Teach me,
Assume all my thoughts are unclean
And you have all my attention
Is there a manual to follow?
Or words to borrow?
I need your instruction
'cause now I have a box
Full of things I wanna say
But always tomorrow,  never today
I pray I'll be brave,
before I reach my grave.
...

If only I could
Say the things I really mean,
And **** the things that'll never be
And just be me?
...

Show me,
The expression of things in my heart
And how to stop this free-flow of shooting darts
And tell me I'm not mad
For as I lay here,  it all seems hard
And now I'm sad
Please help me,  I cry out
Please show me,  I need a way out
...

If only I could
Share with you, matters of the heart
Then I will tell you what I should
That love for you fills this once empty heart.
...

If only I could,
I'd just say: I love you.

© 2018 Busola S. Kolade