Maybe it was the way you lend me your lighter
That night something felt brighter
How I smiled when I found out
**** how bad I wanted to shout

How the first few weeks felt
Its like we were held by a belt
But how I felt next to your comfort
Never expected to find your sort

Weeks passed, weeks passed and I grew fonder
The thought of us I always ponder
How you said we had a future
Never thought it would also mean torture

"Your eyes they melt me" you lied
Stupidly, I believed and cried
I can no longer count the chances I've given you
Still I believed that everything were true

You dared to stomp on my heart
And managed to still call it art
How you could look me in the eye when you cursed
And I couldn't do anything but let tears burst

and if you are still the way you have always been, you're the lucky ones because most of us have taken ourselves apart down to the very molecules we are made up of and rearranged them to someone else's liking

and if you are still happy then you're the lucky ones, because most of us are so depressed we are willing to lather our stomachs in alcohol and burn our throats with smoke for fun, or to forget that person who made us feel like we were sitting in a haystack of needles, stabbing and wounding every inch of our skin

and if you still strive for your highest hopes and dreams, then you're the luckiest ones, because most of us settle for less, and only climb the ladder until we think we have reached the top

and if you're in love, you really are the luckiest of all, because we are all mostly bitter over those we have lost, thinking we are unable to find someone that will bring us the same happiness that the other person used to bring

the boy who didn’t know himself yet. he held my hand before he became he. he asked me out before he was himself. i said no.
2. the girl who holds my hand and tells me i am ****. she thinks many people are ****. i am one of many crushes. how many times do i have to say no?
3. the person from my french class. we are friends. they don’t love me anymore. they never asked. i wouldn’t have said no.
4. the girl with bottle blonde hair. she was the first one i ever kissed. now we don’t talk. i should’ve said no.
5. the person who took pictures of me in the park. they don’t know me very well. i don’t know if i can say no.
6. the girl who knew me in seventh grade. she sends me messages me daily. i don’t know if she knows the word no.

im the girl who would
apologize to you for bleeding
on your shirt after i got shot


im the girl who would
break down and cry after looking
at the most beautiful flower


im the girl who would
depend on others for happiness
because she cant satisfy herself


im the girl who you would never want,
im the girl with scars and burns,
im the girl who would never get a boyfriend.

im the girl that no one wants.

and i had to develop
new feelings for the person
who just entered
my horrible life,
because it was once you,
who i gave my heart too,
but all you did,
was break my heart,
and he's the one who's trying to fix it,
but i dont know if ill love him,
because the feelings i have for you,
are totally different than
what i have for him,
because deep in my heart,
i know i still love you,
and that *****.

I've been waiting
waiting by the phone for a text
a text that I'm never going to get
its sad to say that I'm deeply in love with someone
someone who doesn't care that i even exists
we dated for 3 years
but now, now she has someone else
someone else to text
someone else to call the best
nothing hurts more then being the one who got left
because while shes of laughing and having new relationships
I'm stuck here with a mind full of thoughts
and a chest full of
nothing
there nothing left inside my chest