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life is so complex
that keeping it simple
takes a lot of work
Senryu
 Jun 2016 Aarushi Vijay
R
Love is...
 Jun 2016 Aarushi Vijay
R
Love is such a weird thing.
It makes you cry, laugh, scream, hate.
Love controls all.
To love is to control your emotions, your family, your life.

Love and hate are very similar in some ways.
The emotions caused by both are thrown around
causing so much trouble in a lot of people's lives.
To love is to want and need.

Pain is also like love.
It's what comes with it.
A big package that nobody signs up for willingly.
To love is to have a ticking time bomb in your pocket.

To have pain
is to have hate
is to be in love.

How could such a small word
have such a big meaning?

So, what is love?
Is it pain?
Hate?
Or is it something most of us have not experienced yet?
Making us quick to judge those who have.
your so glorious babe.
you're just like a dream to me.
every look my way
every time you touch me
leaves me wanting more every time
you got me marveling about you day and night.
**** this is crazy..
I'm not that type to go out chasing after a guy on the first sight..
but boy the way you got me hooked babe reel me in.
By the way you got me feeling i can tell that there's gonna be more.
Shot babe, theres something so **** about the way you make me work for it
the way neither of us want to fall in love,
we just in for the fun of it.
**** those other guys could never  compare..
they say that company isn't enough cause they wanna fall in love.
yeah but I dont wanna hear that.
I'm just not there yet.
man either that or they say there's no more good woman among many
i guess i tend to think differently.
cause you go behind your girlfriends back with five other girls just using them on the side.
then you  lie and get mad at your girlfriend cause she just found out...
don't get me mistaken babe, im not saying they are all like that
but ****, you guys have a reputation of playing good woman.
so don't blame me if i don't wanna fall in love.
Nobody likes anyone whose perfect.
yet how come we all strive to be perfection?
seems like we always want what we don't need.
we make it our every effort to be flawless for everyone else.
caring so much about the way others see us,
we forget to just be our selves...
Feeling so disconnected from the world
yet trying so hard just to feel accepted
we forget what it means to just be, without striving all the time.
never realizing that perfection is the you, without trying.
It's a cruel world we treat ourselves like an advertisement.
So caught up in an obsession that leads to death painfully, sadly.
Looking in the mirror watching her body  waste away,
Yet still to her it's getting more, and more beautiful every day.
Yet every day she get sicker,
covering up the hate for herself by Immersing  herself in liquor.
Is this the right thing that we've been teaching the world? To consume our self-hate? To tremble every time we see a title having anything to do with cake? Cringing everytime we think we might be gaining alittle weight? But alittle weight in reality is nothing to everyone else but an idea you created in your head. Constantly you continue to dread the next time you have to face a meal. Caring to much about the way you appeal.
She says she's 100 pounds too heavy.... Being 110 already.
Girl do you hear yourself?
You see a masked and disguised version of the body your confused  minds blinded you to always see.
scratching at anything everything trying to find a hint of self-worth yet leaving empty-handed.
it's a painful addiction promising you a body that's beauriful so pretty, too skinny.
Skipping breakfast like it's nothing. Then sitting before lunch and dinner don't want to feel the pain that so real, So you push the plate away and leave can't stand the thought of gaining another pound.
Running with your fears,
numbers dictate nearly everything you do.
So you restrict and starve.
Losing your hair as fast as your weight.
This is the painful cycle you choose that we all hate.
Your burning.
You consistently battle thoughts, temptations, it takes up all of your time.
They have no idea but they judge anyway.
you wish you were braver but the idea of throwing it all away is too much, to heavy. These excuses you use on this body that you consistently abuse it's crazy this pain is weighing piece by piece.
you tear  yourself apart.
your ribs getting more and more visible, your meat turning into nothing, it's clinical.
As hard as it is, they don't know what you feel and they never will...
Anorexia.
i find
that the word ****
is a poetic word.

"*******"
is harsh
rude
and
brash.

"**** me"
is ******
crass
and
not classy.

"**** it"
means a lot,
like ***** these ideas
***** what is thought.

I find
**** it
is a good phrase.
The other two
negative,
one that's positive
sometimes.
**** it,
implys a lot.
And in this case
it implied
forgetting
what the others
thought
and how others
saw
us.

-r.y.s
I find the words "**** it" have caused great things in my life.
 Jun 2016 Aarushi Vijay
shelly
The hue of blue is much like you
with smeared beauty and grey eyes
and regrets as deep as the ocean
but through all the wonders and sadness
there's a bit of happiness too
and that is why you
are much like the hue of blue
this is lame af but thats okay
My soul yearns
My body turns
Mind racing
Intrinsic thoughts
Extrinsic emotions
Where do I belong
What is the purpose
      L.Cole
i want to be free

like a feather

in the wind

blowing

floating

going nowhere

yet everywhere

all at once

-n.m.
 Jun 2016 Aarushi Vijay
Free
Free
 Jun 2016 Aarushi Vijay
Free
Free from the worry
Free from knowledge.
Free from the feelings.
Free from it all.
Free from pain,
Free from pleasure,
Free from satisfaction.
Free of useless, Pent up energy,
Free.
Body spent,
But mind renewed.
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