To smile
Not knowing
Whether you mean it
It hurts

You poured your words down my throat
like acid that burned through the insides of my chest.
And it was not my ribs that pained me,
but my lips.
.
.
.
.
.
They stung with a desire to be kissed again.

What is a smile?
To others,
a smile is an expression of happiness,
of emotion.
To me,
a smile is an act.
A facade.
To hide my real feelings.
To hide the perpetual frown planted on this face of mine.
Maybe I fake a smile because I want it to remain frozen on my face,
forever.

I've been blessed with the curse of loving you.

You think your words affect me?
You think I give a **** about a thing that you say??
*****, please.
Say whatever the ******* want.
I will take the blows and the kicks.
They've got no effect on me anyway.
I'm a train going ahead at full speed and if you try to block my path *****, you're going to get run down.
With your iron fist of terror you rule this house but a revolution is about to start.
Enjoy while you can now *****, cause when I'm through with you , you'll take back every single ******* word.
That's a promise

You can feel the tears pooling at the rim of your eyes they say that the eyes are the windows to your soul and my soul is over flowing and it spilling out for everyone to see my raw emotions for you to dissect and make assumptions and nod your head in fake understanding you can never begin to understand my soul and you never will my body is a vessel and my soul fills it to the brim a small trigger sends ripples down my spine and it sends my soul pouring over the edge escaping though any means; tears flowing down my cheeks a lump of emotions forming in the centre of my throat that I cannot stop i feel it rising and rising and finally it escapes as steam would from a kettle as a scream and i bring my hands to my face and my knees buckle under the weight of my overflowing soul and I lose the will to fight it i just let it flow until I am weak and tired and then  with red eyes raw from the weight of the emotions that came pouring from them and a ****** throat i stand up and grab a tissue fake a smile and wipe those tears away clear my throat drink some water smile again it's fine i'm fine no big deal shhh everything is normal i push myself further back into myself and i can feel the pressure start to build again like a ticking time bomb counting down to the next time i lose control and let my soul overflow