There is a house
built out of everything
I've kept bottled up—
a place where I am
out of touch
from everything external
heavy
confusing
and that is where
I would run to now,
that is where
I would breathe.

Nasa'n ka na? Babalik ka pa ba?
Sa mga araw na itinigil natin 'yung oras para ipaalala sa isa't isa
Na dito—sa sandaling 'to tayo masaya
Dito nagmistulang alapaap 'yung mga nararamdaman natin
Sobrang taas nating lumipad
Hindi natin napaghandaan 'yung ating paglagapak
Sa mga araw na malulugmok tayo
Sa sakit
Sa poot
At ako
Sa pag-asang maibabalik pa 'yung mga araw na lilipad tayong muli
Ngunit
Hindi
Tandang-tanda ko 'yung araw na ipinilit kong pabilisin 'yung oras
Hanggang sa marating ko 'yung araw na matatanggap kong hindi ka na babalik
Ngunit
Hindi
Hindi ko pa ata kaya
Hindi ko pa ata kayang dumilat isang araw nang hindi ka kasama
Kaya kahit 'yung sakit papatulan ko na
Naririnig ko pa rin naman 'yung pagtibok ng puso mo
Ngunit papahina na nang papahina
Dahil palayo ka na nang palayo
Gusto ko naman marinig ngayon 'yung tunog ng pagbabalik mo
Para lang maipaliwanag mo sa 'kin kung kailan unang nalagas 'yung mga pakpak natin
O kung aling hangin 'yung nagtulak sa'yo pababa
Dahil hindi ko maintindihan
Hindi ko maintindihan na kahit ilang beses ko nang itiniwarik 'yung mundo nating dalawa
Hindi ko pa rin mahanap 'yung dahilan kung bakit tayo biglang kumawala sa isa't isa
Hindi ko rin naman masabing iniwan mo ako sa ere
Dahil wala na naman ako sa itaas
Na'ndito na ako sa ilalim ng mga alaala nating hinayaan na lang natin sa isang tabi
Nang hindi sinusubukan na dagdagang muli
Na'ndito ako nagpapadagan sa mundo
Habang patuloy lang nang patuloy sa pag-ikot 'to
Na'ndito ako sumasabay sa agos ng sarili kong luha
Na'ndito ako hinihila 'yung sarili ko pababa
Pahingi naman ako ng isa pang pakiramdam
Hindi 'yung puro na lang lungkot
Puro na lang pait
Pahingi ako ng galit
Sige, kahit inis o kahit yamot
Na kung bakit ako lang 'yung naiwang nagmumukmok
Higit sa lahat
Pahingi pa rin ako ng pag-asa
Nasa'n ka na? Babalik ka pa ba?

i've been flirting with death for too long
and my heart aches for him to take my hand
for his marks already linger at my wrist
so the least he could do is hold them

s.s

He seldom bring me flowers
But once a year a dozen red roses
For each month he missed out
~
He never smiles,
unless there was a touch down
I used always made him a cup of herbal tea
whenever, he came to town

However, I on the other hand always smile,
without a reason: it was him and I at that moment
I asked him one or two lumps
I really miss the old chum

He doesn’t bring me flowers anymore
instead they sprung up from his grave in the air:

there are the times
when clouds obscure our view
of blue ethereal skies
and our world grows dark and desolate

days are monotonous and gray
nothing can put a smile into our face
we see the whole confounded human race
doomed to pernicion and without God’s grace

this is the time when it is useful to remember
that it is YOU who calls the shots
YOU who decides what road to follow
YOU who determines where to go
rest, linger, or proceed

so you can truly say
these are the actions of yourself
for which you need

nobody else

Oh cold, dark mistress mine
is our union so taboo?
the day is master to us all
but I yearn to be with you

in your arms I feel at peace
you hold my  fears at bay
but sleep comes swiftly to my eyes
the tool of jealous day

I want the dark and not the light
the moon and not the sun
let them go blind on their fattened star
I prefer billions to one

Night, my dear, please do not cry
I lay awake for you
but a yawn now summons me toward day
and the things that I must do

though my will is 'bout to fail
I will return again
for sleep will find in me a foe
and this battle, I shall win.