I dont know  if
I am either
falling apart
ore
falling in love
I´ve brought my own
torch to the darkness
and stayed awake
despite your madness
I dont know if
I am either
falling in love with you
ore with myself

You left me stranded in a world filled
with bodies, I warm myself
with an echo of your voice
You will never be mine
in this world, not in this body
Your heart is like the cold
frost , undying and ruthless
Drowning my heart,
killing my mood
You tie me to the stars
only to tear me down
like the  comet
I wish I could  
Take it all back.
And leave you at hello

with your heart  open for years
decades pass and you realize that you
still despite the air around you
cannot breath
You open the eyes
to find that you are  far far   away
from everything that you were promised
In the  lovely and bright
we are merly nothing more but a shadow
In this  moon and  darkness
I  think you  will find one  moment
that isin´t yours to capture and frame
we´re all just equally dead
in the presence of god.

after spending

a lifetime on love

writing epic fiction

about romeo and juliet

Before I could escape

faith decided

to automatically

delete my lover

It destroyed my life work

I had put my soul on hold

I had tired uploading

but all was lost

the page reloaded

I was frantically

trying to PROTECT

my  faithful lover

from a system that

destroys   anything beautiful

I was dictated a new start

by force

A terrifying sincerity she would call it.
It was a struggle to carry
herself around in a world
so oblivious to her weight
I adore myself ,But not my life
she said to me over a phonecall
Beautiful were her soul
ore maybe souls
She was like a crowd
in her own mind.
Whenever she would enter a room
not only did her scent linger,
but her beauty stayed with whomever
that was lucky to catch a glimpse of her

I hate when you talk about depression
"I use to have you know " You say with this ridiculous pride
hiding in your tone.
I bite my tounge. Soon I will either break you ore just
break everything around me.
It  hurts . No it angers me.
Depression is a life sentence
it´s not like the flue nor can you "cure" it.
You cannot have depression for two months
and one day wake up from it.
You cannot  cure  depression with a cup of coffee.
Ore  a few  "positive songs".
Depression is born
the day  you feel that first wave of pain.
That moment when you suddenly
dont feel there is room for you in this world.
Depression is the illness that
you deny your whole entire life.
Because you cannot afford one single
moment of utter sadness.
You never dwell in your agony
you simply  hide it.
You go forward despite being pushed back.
There are people who are in denial
about their depression.
Because  their either to brave ore
to afriad to acknowledge that
they are HURT.
And filled with misery
despite being full
you get that ******* free refill
every  ******* day.
Depression is not  a mood.
Its being locked inside
with your demons.
It´s being left alone
with your abusive thoughts.
So dont talk to me
about depression

Has she lost her mind
Why is she so guarded?
-Maybe something was stolen from her once
something that was to precious
No wonder  her eyes are pitch black
and her hair as thick as the night fog
She was a guarded beauty
You know, A complicated
beautiful mess of
error and conflicts.
struck with darkness
by her own madness
She somehow managed to survive your pity
Climbing down those fences
Sometimes even whispering
her name into the void of a lovers heart
She survived, thats all you need to know about this
girl, That she survived YOU,