The departure is brutal.
To say the least.
The waves goodbye harder and harder.
Not only a fysical blow but a mental one.
I see the tears in your eyes.
As you ******* a last kiss.
I watch you board the train.
Mood set on sadness.

Sitting in the car getting my train of thought together again.
Listening to music.
Seeing the passenger seat empty.
A emptiness in my mind and heart.

Only comfort to be found,
is in the next date you'll come over.
That is the only thing that keeps my fear at bay.
Being not together is weird and slightly unnatural
But for now it is the only way.
And as we made an agreement before
I'll see you again friday.
Like every week before.

As we walked through the front door.
Leaving behind the place that only recently became a place of happy memories.
We take heartbreaking steps towards the car.
Wishing we would have enjoyed it even a little more.
A little longer.
We drive , but keep strong.
We grabbed something to eat to fill the time remaining.
We laughed a few times.
Sweet became bitter as we walked upon the train station platform.
A final drag of our sigarette.
The , for now atleast, final kisses.
Both not great at goodbyes.
We try not to cry.
Her heart racing against mine.
The doors close.
The train starts to move.
I look back a last time.
Hoping I oversaw her in a crowd.
I comfort myself.
Knowing that I can say
"Welcome home"
To her again.

He is loyal, my god is he loyal, to a fault really.
Don't abuse this quality like I did.
Don't push his buttons and test him limits needlessly,
yes he will stay. Even after you yell and scream,
don't.
He does have a temper. Sometimes it is scary.
Don't match his anger with yours.
Just sit him down and help him calm down.
He will apologize profusely for scaring you.
His anger turns to fear quickly,
it is a delicate scenario.
Be patient with him,
I may have taught him how to love,
but I also left scars.
He is idealistic, he will plan a future with you,
if you're anything like me, it will be before you're ready,
just be honest with him about it.
The worst thing you can do is shut him out,
be honest with him and you will get honesty in return.
Most of all, love him.
Love him hard, and with everything you have,
because he deserves that.

I am going insane.
Oh wait, I already am.
I see the demons already,
I see the floods.
At least I don't see,
crimson blood.

I've come to the point
To the crossroad
of my chosen path
Choices surpress me
Letting go feels wrong
Carrying on feels wrong

The choices between past and future
pulling from all directions
Dividing me in all directions
You can see my pain quite vividly

As I look at the path ahead
Turn my head and look a little while back
I feel torn apart

I feel a soft touch
A very familiar smell
A smile only one could have
Centering my every emotion
A balance I only knew from a distant memory

I look at the path where I stand.
And suddenly the pieces fall together.
This is not my stop
But this is where I step off
This is where I let now decide

We put on foot in front another
slowly walking to what nobody knows
But this is exactly where I need to be
Not my stop
But almost , and quite clearly
Something what some people call
Destiny.

We walk at the beat
We rebel against our own heartbeat
We see no reason for living
And clearly the only thing we do
is giving love to those around us

We live for the joy on
other faces
filling in their black spaces
Pushing back the terrors from past memories

We do not understand how you could not have been loved
How nobody saw the sadness in your smile
the happiness in your tears.

How could you live without
somebody telling you
You look beautiful
You are worth much more than the room you take in this cold room

We fail to see your mask
you held up for so long
We see your walk
Your desparation
We embrace the evil within
We do not fear what we can't see
But it makes us go
It keeps us awake

This is the walk of desparation we always take.