He’s saying,
As long as you stay, you can leave as you please

He’s saying,
As long as you return to me by sunrise, you can run free at midnight
Saying nothing When I come home by daylight, just as long as it seems we are together in public eyes.

Games we play are pure Deceptions.
I’m in home sweet prison, we are papered bind, chained by delusions and lies. Our love is like doing time and even though he senses the unhappiness on my mind, he says to me all the time “you will be alright”

"I do" was my crime. Our child is the paying fine. So I’m Akon "Locked up" until He closes his eyes. He hears when I sneak out, so even he sleeps with one eye open, towards my unfaithful behavior. He Pretends to be blind.

Im Trained to be home momentarily. Agreeing to be in his detentions temporarily.
For when he met me my love was untameable widly desired to be spirited and free

But he refuses my request to be free. He holds on tight and that’s even if it’s killing me.

So when he senses my  surpressive screams to finally leave. He will rush to leave out the set of keys. Within my arms reach. by my bar side intentionally. because he knows my desire to run yet in need of a safe home.  he holds  the keys.  Giving me a copy version to be free.

And If I don't return like we lawfully agreed, The punishment of manipulation will be black hole deep. He will catch me and emotionally blackmail me. Verbally put on the handcuffs, steal away my keys.
appoint me to the critical  judge, reminding me he’s the man who holds my Keys to leave.

Presenting my  past and mistakes to the courthouse packed with tyrants, which will be past me's. Deferment my character, rule me as guilty. Killing my spirit by Belittling my dreams. Crying that I attempted ******. attempting to **** him. for attempting to steal me.

He won. Victimized and trapped I return to my cell.
After verabally placing on the black and white strips and putting me through hell.

handcuffs on tight, game face on right,
He taunts me with tactics all day and night......

30 days of his controll, guilt trip complete.
He surprises me with kind  gesture and ask how bad do you want to be free?

He plays with sound of jingling keys, a melody that sounds good to me
Next to my Bar side, He finally placed down my set of keys
And reminds me,
That as long as you return here by sunrise, you are free to leave

Its like holding empty glass to your mouth, hoping for something to spill out..... Why pretend?

Stimulate me, not down there but here.... in my heart ♥

AM I told what to think? Without gaining knowledge on how to think.
AM I taught how to feel? without understanding why I feel.
AM I raised in what to believe?  Not given the freedom in what I want to believe.
AM I told what to be?  Without allowing to simply be.
To know thy self is to gain understanding and knowledge of self. That is to individually and authentically  find who I am and what my purpose is .
How do I gain knowledge on what I retain in my mind including:    subconsciously and consciously
and how do I learn to understand my emotions, feelings and hear the purpose of my soul
physiological identity crisis in me is so surreal that I do not how to be real

My Fears: I don't fear Karma, I fear never living life. I fear missing out on learning lessons that I would need to experience in order to grow. I fear  being comfortable enough to settle. I fear never loving myself to fullest and not reaching my highest potential. I fear never knowing myself. I am learning "don't fear to disappoint others, fear to disappoint yourself" -I said that

I can feel that, Stop it
Stop thinking about me so that I can stop thinking about you.

She didn't want to be found, unless he was mystery man
Doesn't give permission to be touch unless he carries blistering hands
O yes he must be experience, give me the history of a man
who flirts with fire and and and dares to love again
a war zone he must enter , fight each enemy of my mind
Save me from myself and paradise he shall find
Give me a prisoner of curiosity
Who remembers everything  left unsaid
killed by my mystery but keeps coming back again
Intellectual to know I am rough, but brave enough to dig deep
and find I have diamonds between my thighs and a heart of red ruby
Give me the world but a place I can loose myself here on after
He who is brave enough to love the beautifully broken, imperfect, a beautiful disaster
Challenge my powers and not afraid to be the man to stand alone
against the wrath of a woman burned by Hell's fury or cries of rainstorms
Push me to the limit, carry me through my fears
Build me to be better and unconditional love is  here
Seek the secrets I conceal, and watch a cover girl reveal
Mars, a flame is sparked. Be a moth burned by the fire
Give me passion, courage, strength and in return be loved by Venus's Fire