Alone.

Empty are the seats across your dinner table,
Missing are the people that surrounded you.
I'm alone, you feel.
But what if I told you,
It's okay to be alone.

You may yearn for their company,
Their love, their laughs, their joys.
But you find yourself here, now,
By yourself and a cup of coffee.

Alone.

Not many like to experience it.
Nor do they understand it.
But the truth is,
Do they have to?

It's okay to be alone.
But not lonely.
Leave those who make you feel alone,
Even if they don't before.

Sometimes, being alone,
Is the only ingredient you need,
To feel normal. Again.

Deception.
To deceive,
Or be deceived.

Smile on their faces,
Daggers behind my back.
How it happened, no one knows.
No one, but they know.

Countless times, I'd been stabbed.
Bruised, broken, beaten.
Not physically, but emotionally.
I don't know why I led them closer,
Close enough to carve my heart,
With their cold-blooded knifes.

This make me stronger.
It makes me wiser.
Instead of breaking down,
I learn.
I learn from those who betrayed me,
Those who toyed with my conscience.
And those who preyed.

Now,
Each walk out my door,
Their greetings not to me,
But my mask.

From the one being deceived,
Now the one to deceive.

For the price of a smile,
How much are you willing to give?

Can you walk the plank into the sea,
Only to fall into a wet mess?
Can you perform in front of masses,
Only to forgot the lyrics?
Can you spend time planning surprises,
Only to have it cancelled because of the weather?

Can you do all these and more,
Just to see her smile?
Days, months, sometimes years,
For a crescent on her face?

For me,
It may be a year,
Or just a day.
But for a smile,
"How long?", they said.
"No matter.", I said.
Just a smile from you, indeed,
For all I know that's all I need.

What about you?
What can you do?
What will you do?
Just to see them smile?

Christmas, Christmas, oh Christmas' here,
Time for giving, laughing, cheering.
Unwrapping, dining, dancing, love,
Truly my favorite time of the year.

On that note, let's not forget.
Although this' the season of giving,
We should receive as well.
For we give what we receive,
And receive what we give.

But to me, all I know is,
No matter the year,
No matter the day,
As long as you love and are loved,
Everyday is a holiday.

When I wanted catch a movie with my friends,
You ripped my ticket.
When I wanted to wear that shirt my sister gave me,
You threw it away.
When I wanted to talk,
You shut me up and cut me off.

With every little thing I do,
It's always wrong to you.
With every gifts I bought for you,
It's in the garage the next day.
With every planned surprises I made,
It's never surprising to you.

When you wanted those dresses,
I tailored them for you.
When you wanted that ring,
I worked and saved for months.
When you are always down,
I was there to lift you up.
Always.

But what about me?
Is this only a one-sided love?

While I smile everyday,
I'm walking on eggshells too.
Hanging by a thread,
Not knowing what to do.

As days passed,
Months even.
The thought of you dissipates,
More, and more, and more.
I only realized what I should had done from the start,
When I threw the ring into the sea.

All I know is,
I'm living on borrowed time.

A table for two,
For you and me.
Food on our plates,
With cups of tea.

We chatted and laughed,
Till night turns to day.
But never once that you did,
Without your phone, you speak.

Beneath the palm trees,
On a bed of snow.
Laughter, Tears, full of joy,
Feels like time had never flowed.

Again, you reached for your pocket,
And whipped out your phone.
Texting, calling, and gaming,
What about me, am I all alone?

At my favorite concert,
A theatrics of shows.
Singing, dancing, cheering,
Not a single sad soul.

However, it's not just you,
Everyone was on their phones.
Recording, recording, and recording,
Crowds became monotone.

It led me to think,
Can we truly exist,
Even just for a day,
Without a phone's assist?

Oh, the power of spoken vocabulary,
Like lyrics to a song,
And music to a score.
While music are pleasing,
Sometimes, what you say are unneeded.

Words are just noise.
Pollution to the air.
Shut your mouth, they said.
Unimportant, they feel.
Yet,
No one considered how I felt.

Burning desire to express,
But always afraid of reject.
Yes, fear only lives in your mind,
But if speeches had knifes,
I probably have a few in my heart.

Maybe I'm not important,
But at least let me speak.
Have a hear to what I say,
Then you can make your way.

Words are just noise.
Words are just noise.
Repeat with me,
Words are just noise.
*But only to some.

Laying on the bed of sparkling stars,
Underneath the brilliant glow of the moon.
Matching each dots in the sky,
Coming together to form an image of you.

Alone, still alone,
Without your touch,
Without your tone.
Oh, convince me, please,
That this is only a dream.

Do you sense the breeze?
Listen to its cries.
Is the hello just a disguised goodbye?
Is the truth a fraction of a lie?

Drops of water fell from nowhere,
Maybe it's the rain, maybe it's just me.
I just know that, no matter the choice,
This song is within your key.

In time, the winds shall whisper your name.
Until then, what once was, will be, again.

We're surrounded by many blessings in life.
Roof over our heads,
Food on our plates,
Clothes on our backs,
Families, friends and partners.

Yet, why are we not valuing what we have,
But valuing what we don't have?
Are they needs, or just wants?
Tangibles versus the intangibles,
Can you differentiate the importance?

Money isn't the only measure for wealth.
Switch your perspective around.
From materialistic views, luxurious riches,
To small but equally beautiful qualities of life.

Not all that sparkles are treasures,
Not all that glitters are gold.
Only when one appreciates what one has,
No amount of gifts will ever please.

*"You only know what you have when it's gone".

There was a time, where I was all alone.
Shivering, depressed, afraid.
Always thought, I was destined.
Destined to face everything alone.

Until you came.
You showed me what it feels to be me.
How two is better than one.
And held my soul within your grasp, close to your heart.
Like two indestructible forces,
We tackled life's challenges.
With you by my side,
Nothing is ever impossible, only improbable.

But the day I feared,
The day I hoped never came,
came.

You left.
Like all the others who said won't leave.
I was crushed. Murdered.
Your soul, was the only suspect.

... why?
Why did you left me, with such bittersweet memories,
Only to take them away in the end?
Was it something I did?
Was it something I said?
... why?

Now all I'm left,
Are knifes through my heart.
Clinging onto a tattered soul.
And memories.

Memories we once shared, embraced, loved.
Gone. All. Gone.

Sometimes, things may not go your way.
Sometimes, there aren't any options left.
Sometimes, all you feel is just pain.

However, there's always a way.
A way to try again.
A way to start where you stopped.
And a way to pick yourself up,
Brush yourself off,
And keep trying.

You must learn to crawl before you can walk.
You must learn to walk before you can run.
You must learn to fall before you can fly.

As the Sun never stops rising,
No one should ever stop trying.
Even if all you have left is hope,
Keep trying.
It is the only thing worth fighting for.
And that is reason enough to keep going.

Learn to try. Again.

I’ll try not to tame the rolls.
It’s not always fun and games,
When the winner’s always you.
The stakes are on my toll.

Life is a game, love is a gamble,
Just roll the dice.
Snake-eyes, rhyming numbers,
You’ll be surprised,
At who rolls the dice.

As the clouds clear, and the music ends,
*The rule of the dice is, the roller never wins.