My name was a
morning coffee secret you
keep between cupped hands.

There I lingered,
up until I went lukewarm
and then you poured me out

onto the ground upon discovering  
the bubbling champagne of her.

One day, you'll awaken,
with blood shot eyes,
scratching at a five o'clock shadow,
even though it's seven o'clock
in the morning, and
wonder where it all went wrong. Where she all went wrong.

When the arches of her feet stopped
tiptoeing across the room
to kiss you good morning.
When the parallels of her calves
started making diagonals
when laying on the bed.
When the crook of her elbows
no longer wrapped around you
like the beautiful ribbon on the present you gave to her last Christmas.

Do you even know where that present is?
It's there,
up there on the shelf collecting dust
along with all the "I love yous"
and other promises that you stash away for cold winters nights,
when you crave her warmth,
and long to feel the chill of her sapphire-painted fingernails.

But somewhere between the cicadas of summer and the apples of autumn, you lost her along the way.
You lost the way her hair finds its way onto every surface of your house.
You can't find the way her nose wrinkles when she laughs,
even if you turn over all the couch cushions,
and look under the rug.

You check your file cabinets for the way her chest heaves when she sleeps,
and check in the pantry for the memories of her propped up on her elbows,
looking out the window sill at the rain,

But all that's left are phantoms of her amber scent,
and ghost-smiles that have all but gone stale.

I feel strongly for a
boy with eyes the color of
bullets
and with biceps built strong
like bolts in the armor
of a tank.

He wears stains of dirt
on calloused hands from
years
of digging plots 6 feet down.
(He thought his name
would be on the tombstones.)

Behind a small smile
and a boisterous laugh,
the affliction rages on. He is the army
of one, battling against an enemy
he’ll see only in the reflection of
his dog tag.

He* paints the setting sky with his bare hands;
Shades of orange bursting with the same
vibrancy as the life in his smile.
Crimson of a passion bleeding out of open wounds so
deep I believe his soul is fathomless.
Pinks like soft lips planting kisses along the curve
of a body he has yet to till.
Cerulean matching irises of eyes lighting up in
the sunshine he bestows through an
inescapable darkness.
A spectrum into existence by his design-
I tell him everything created is art.

I imagine- in the darkest shadows of midnight-
a garden enchanted by the magic of pixie dust.

Here, love is a blossoming rose eager to open
it’s petals; underneath, we are the soil, allowing it grow.