today,
i wore it again
and people complimented me
they say red is my color
and it suits me.

today,
it's too thick and dark
did i overapply
no, it's the right amount
just enough
to make them think
i'm fine.

today,
i look at myself
in the mirror,
and they're right
red shines on me,
so i applied
another layer,
and another
until my lips felt too thick,
but my eyes still see
the scars beneath it.

These words are for me,
For I'm the one who's hurting,
I'm just healing myself.

Heaven rained on me,
I breathed in the petrichor,
Bathed in the downpour.

It may look like I'm silent
But don't let it fool you
I'm holding back the will
To say that I love you

your name is
forbidden in
my mouth
or in my heart
because when
i think about
you;

i'll cry a little more,
hurt a little stronger
love a little softer
because you no longer
make me feel sober

i'm drunk on the
memory of you