Here say have someplace in Collegetown,
You are on with VW because yesterday you were beginning to fade.
You start down rain now after a sunny morning,
When you slow down the blinking gets worse,
That huge old green house on the corner of the shiny face of you,
You feel terror in your people on their way to Ha D es,
To go all day—in case they can’t stop,
So this is what failed...  You couldn’t avoid that crowd,
Chances are that any one of these people had quarreled with a friend,
The Impact was you... in Ithaca

It's 3am and I won't sleep so we went upstairs-
"Its funny that we can have a joke"
-only to discover personal possession...

Just a whisper too loud, yet the silence echoed much louder.

Waiting to put on two pairs of shoes at once,
wait that's two too many shoes...
put those back.

Sprinting down the street, only to meet a god of a tree.
Golden. Holy. Fading in and out of dreams.

Riiiiiiiing, Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiing, Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiing

"Hello" "Hey, It's common sense, get home"
"Yeah I was trying, but I'm stuck at this stop sign..."

Week after week,
life drops the weak,
All of this strife makes us reek-
of depression, The Great Depression?
More of a depression of the Greats...
It started with Bowie, all these phonies,
mourn for something- someone they weren't around,
to witness or experience...

Hatching and shading,
Erasing false lines,
Erase Erase Erase Erase,
Swipe off that mess-
Pencil scratches against thick paper,
I sit and draw even though I should be listening,
taking notes, finishing my work,
but wait, I never finished this sketch of a lion,
that's much more important...
Isn't it?

When I catch a droplet of inspiration,
to sketch out some idea conjured of mine,
such is a spark of creation,
When compared-
creativity to reality,
this "acid free" "medium surface"
sketch paper renders ones thoughts so minuscule,
Leashed down,
like a young pup to a tree,
my ability can only bring me so far...

Too much Too much Too much
/
Anxiety stands over me, looking down at false mistakes
/
Too much Too much Too much
/
I look up with pride in my eyes, I'm free of sin you ****
/
Too much Too much Too much
/
Subtract that value, they don't care, nor will I.
/
Too much Too much Too much

"As is,"
"Leave it at that,"
"When I say, you do."

All of this focus on control and power,
yet those 'in' power-
are in the worst place,
the most stressed, the most feared,
a superlative disgrace,
and it all goes downhill as the end nears.
Just dont pull me down when it all starts to fall from beneath you.

Those little moments
Losing your thoughts in her eyes
Losing your time in her lips
Gaining more trust in no lies
There’s no value to life
Yet we assign so much meaning
Like it will all yield some greater prize
Or reward like a lost trunk in the attic
full of old toys and lost memories
All I have right now is hope and a friend

"Yeah shes in the hospital"
"Dont say anything though..."

How could you say that to the only person who truly cares?
One who could always make me smile, or feel light as air,
she may not mean what you think, so pull up a chair.

Laughter and poor taste, leave all to gather, and much to waste
time, money, and all that matters,
but when you feel such joy with 'just' a friend,
"Dont say anything though...", really is just a punch to the liver.

A one way ticket up,
the man never questioned it, then again, neither did I

Walking down the trail, grapes are raining and the pain in my stomach isn't waning, reality is collapsing all over again and all i can taste is almonds.

These boulders are spiraling out of control, but since when have I had control?
The head of the goat looks me in the eyes as the sun sets over the range,
"Man, you guys are brave", but why?
Am I on the edge?

Does position matter when neither place holds value,
when you're not supposed to care yet you still fall into the wrong place,
or when all others see you moving down, and so do you, but you're happy.

For now.

They say to dream big but only talk small.
When did I become someone with problems?
Relationships suddenly feel like climbing a mountain just find another peak,
Money is getting tight, yet I started with none,
Time is closing in on this newborn.

The inevitable gain of value in a person
will also lead that same individuals demise.

They all seem to hate me,
I feel the stares, I hear the jokes,
Is it me?
           Or them?
                         Or you?
I know I am new, and maybe that is it,
but such anxiety over something so small is new,
and old but I thought I had overcome the past.

Maybe I should ask...

What were you thinking,
sitting on the cusp of your guilt.
Why are you guilty of success?
All that shame and regret that has been built,
Shameful of what, how youv'e been blessed?
Up you look at those who you say don't matter,
serving up your deepest motives on a gold plated platter,
letting those who look and open jewel filled eyes,
observe your life and take what they find,
Don't be so naive, asking for time to breathe,
just use your mind and shut those blinds,
shut down and take control,
Let your passion soaked willpower unfurl,
like a sail after a storm, swirls and swirls,
then open up to the world,
let those colors blaze, clearing away such ancient haze.

Once that sun shines bright, pushing away selfish blight,
Let new ideas blossom, cross your T's and your I's, dot them,
Think them through, Colors red white blue, no,
Just the color of you.