it's forever and i'm in love

i call you at 2 in the morning
i am crying
"it won't happen again"

it's forever and i'm in love

you text me at 11:57 pm
"we need to talk"
my heart stops
and my throat tightens

it's forever and i'm in love*

my mind wanders to
the pills left in my top drawer
my heart is heavy
and my lungs want to sleep
you come across my mind
and i stay

it's forever and i'm in love

i call you at 2 in the morning
i am crying
"i'm sorry."

*it's not forever and i'm in love

Who are you to say that you know me better than everyone else?
Even my shadow is unaware of my doings when I enter the darkness.

you saw sadness,
and you never noticed the pain.

you heard the thunder,
and ignored the rain.

but yet you wonder,
just why you dug my grave.

you saw, my dear.

but you cannot see.

Perfection is in imperfection.
Your scars tell a story.
A story of struggles.
A story of life.
A story of strength.
These lines you write,
a blade as a pen,
have meaning.
They are dangerous,
but so are words.
Share with me what you share with your wrists.
Share your worries.
Your fears.
Your anger.
Your love.
Some secrets deserve to be shared

I left money on the table
It was more than I was worth
Scrawled a note
Crawled into bed
And fell into a dream so dark
I couldn't remember
Above my empty body I rose
Floated through the walls of my room
Towards the blackness of a sky polluted by city lights
The rain fell gently through me as I traveled
Across places I had never seen
And faces I had never been
Conversation’s fragments raked across my feet
But I was afraid to look down
Even when I heard my name
I was still afraid
For it was not love with which it was spoken
The name was a curse
Spat from the lips
Like venom from the ill
On I drifted
Towards a sun that would never shine
Searching for a moon I’d never find
Warmth seeped from my ears
From the gaping hole in my chest
From beneath my fingernails
Life’s blood, or was it tears
Somewhere in the stillness of the night
I heard myself still crying
And knew I had not died
My eyes opened with a searing flash of pain
Rays of light pouring through my windows
Stabbing into the recesses of my skull
Into my tainted soul
I am awake
But for this life of me I cannot understand why