B l e e d
o           r
r            e
e           a
D o o m

L o v e
o
N o t e
e
R e a d

          S
       h   c
     i        r
   v  a  n  e
  e             a
r                m    

A n x i e t y
          g
          n
          o
          r
          e
   ­       d

h                t        
u                o
r                 r
t h o u g h t              
i                 u
n                r
g                e

One day, 6 years ago
suddenly it was there
I didn't see it coming
it crawled under my skin
into my head
settled in my thoughts

One day, 6 years ago
I started to feel
how no one should feel
ugly
unworthy
unlovable
suddenly I felt uncomfortable
in my forever home

One day, 6 years ago
my skin
my own body became my prison
my head
my own thoughts felt like hell

One day, 6 years ago
I stopped
eating
sleeping
I became someone
I never imagined to be

One day, 5 years ago
I somehow started to recover
I learned to be good on my own
that I don't need anybody
I recovered on my own

One day, 4 years ago
I realized
those thoughts and habits never left
but it didn't matter
I somehow managed to live with them

One day, 3 years ago
those thoughts became worse
I hid them
no one was allowed to see all this
all this **** that's going on in my head

One day, 2 years ago
I lost every loved one
I felt like I'm losing myself
still with a smile on my face

One day, 1 year ago
I realized how bad i became again
I realized I never truly recovered
my mind was hell itself

One day, today
I haven't become better
but that is not my worst
I want to become better
I truly want to become better.

candles light up her room
it smells like herbs
and flowers

fall is her favorite season
she enjoys the rain
while dancing trough the woods
barefooted

she's one with nature and the sun
but in love with the moon

like sunrise he entered my days
filled them with brilliance and a lot to praise
as time passed by
he faded away
like the sunset does
he took all the brightness away

so much love
but its never enough
so much trust
but then in vain
so much to loose
but little to gain
so much pain
but it all goes down the drain
because for you
its all a game!
oh! such a shame!