Why can't I find the flames that once burned beneath skin?
Changed from warm to cold and dark
Reality's breath blew out the fire deep in me
Transformed my core into coals black, chalky, and dark


Attempting to force a glimmer of hope in my eyes
Ignite carefree wonder with a spark of belief
Then I could be unharnessed and rile passion
That scalds any unwanted lingering grief

Beyond these pages is genuine pain
Still alive though my heart won't beat
A hundred perfect words could not replace
Sought-after inferno, world devoid of heat

Head hung low in debilitating  failure
Dragging feet with purposeful defiance
Mistakes resting their weight on my back
Hunt for embers in half-hearted compliance

One candle lit to awaken misplaced zeal
Eternity tried silently stealing away
Sunset has the right shades of Orange and red
But lacks love it used to invoke each day

I am overanalyzing this
Eventually find the ecstasy that died
Don't care if It's a person, place, or idea
Something out there will rekindle lost feelings inside

You are poking at my sore spots
Causing them to redden and swell
Leaving bruises upon ego
Due to show-and-tell

Tear at my facade
Standing there in victory
Watching as I fall down
Laughing while I scramble frantically

I'm screaming at you to stop
In an angry fog
Still love you even full of rage
When you won't say you're wrong

Arms sternly crossed, grow furrowed
Somehow caused me to react
Trapped within the spotlight
Wanting to exit your "concerned" act

Maybe I am just bitter because
You pretend like you care
But really take pleasure in
Exposing secrets stripped bare

It kills my pride to be embarrassed
Here you are mocking
Use my pain for satisfaction
False statements I try blocking

Your voice relentlessly cutting through
Dripping mean drops of bitter defeat
Eyes filled to the brim with resentment
The reason I flee on my feet

Although you are talking out of your ***
I know you don't intend any harm
You just love spreading propaganda
Masking wickedness with charm

Some opinions best left unspoken
Truth lies in your voice
You don't care enough to sort it out
Collect bits of conversation, share It, rejoice

Am I too sensitive, moody, and soft?
Experience should have made me strong
Losses only thinned armor
Eroded by countless decisions wrong

Caught in an infinite power struggle
You fight logic with exaggeration
I've surrendered, white flag waved
A soldier of your own creation

Go stir the *** again
That taunting tone I hate
I love you mom, tell me why
You have to instigate