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Lisa Neu Feb 2015
Evasive
    Mysterious
    I want to reach out
       Touch
          Feel
       Watch
          No words
             Just Being.
          Quiet
             words
          Passing Each other
             Apart
                Yet drawn together
             Evasive
                Tension
             what would happen if --
             I reached out my hand...
                         and you took it?
Lisa Neu Feb 2015
If an older person falls asleep at work,
    they are tired because of the work they've done.
If a younger person falls asleep at work,
    they must have played too hard last night.
Is it the fact that a younger person may have
    had fun last night that engages the judgment?
Is it jealousy or anger for a feeling of loss in being older?
I would like to be accepted as I am;
    appreciated for the gift of my continued youth.
I would like to feel respected --
    regardless of my age, my thoughts or my JOY.
Maybe it's all about love.
Lisa Neu Feb 2015
Age-assumptions are allowed
where youth is concerned
because --
EVERYONE WANTS TO BE YOUNG.
But truthfully,
the gift is not in the youth itself,
but in the young people.
Just as with people of greater age,
young people have talents, strengths, and wisdom.
The difference lies in our perception that
youth have more time to realize their potential.
That they will, in time, become something great
-- and yet --
the challenge really should be for all,
that we grow past our labels
realize our potentials
and become who we're meant to be
TODAY.
Lisa Neu Feb 2015
I am Lisa*
Youth is a good thing I guess,
unless --
It becomes the lens
through which you are seen.

Then --
Your ambitious ideas are
youthful, not wise
Your wittiness is
immaturity, not humor
Your springy-step is
young bones, not joy in living.

Youth is a good thing I guess,
but better, *authenticity
.

I am who I am, 20 or 60.
My age affects me,
but my age isn't me.
I am who I am.
Lisa Neu Feb 2015
I often offer hope to the world
I see it as my job;
My task in the world.

I enjoy being the spark of light
in the darkness!
So often my spark ignites flame in others.

However; today the wind is strong
and my little spark is having trouble
staying lit.

I need to learn how to maintain my spirit
even on days like today;
I cannot let the wind of the moment
affect the flame of today and the fire of tomorrow.
Instead of seeing the wind as a threat to existence,
I need to see it as the wind of life which will, in time,
make the flame burn brighter; the light spread farther.

Windy, cloudy, dark days only test our resolve
on the journey of faith.
If we are only hopeful, only bright on the good days,
then what are we?

Indeed, I accept the challenge of living faith.
I accept the duty to "put on Christ"
and so the wind, the darkness cannot daunt me.

For didn't Jesus say, "take up your cross and follow me?"
Jesus never promised the road would be easy.

Jesus also suffered from emotional exhaustion.
Remember, his response to God's call was,
"not my will, but your will be done."

Jesus took hope in the fact that God was in control.
He followed his calling unto death;
So must I take hope in God; God is my strength.

My pain, my trouble, my worry
is for nothing
Because ultimately God is in control,
and if I trust in God,
all the pain, trouble and worry
may still be there
but in the end is the assurance
that through the goodness of God,
I will make it.
Lisa Neu Feb 2015
Do you ever have days
where you are just "off"?
You know --
Days where your head aches
and everything you try seems fruitless?

Today was a day like that for me
and no matter what I do,
the headache continues; the pain continues.

I miss being home;
I miss my kids;
I miss Tony.

Some days working is such a burden
even when it is a joy.

This is the third night this week
I'm away from home.
The third night Gabriel will need to
go to bed without being nursed.
The third night I won't have been
able to help Madeline with her homework.

Sometimes the pace
of my life and work
gets to me.

Like today.

Then I wonder - is my work worth so much?
that I sacrifice time with my family?
I miss things --

Things like Gabriel's first time climbing
up the stairs.
Like the first time Dominic went to preschool;
the first time Madeline went to the dentist.

And why really?
What's the point?
Is work that important?

Today was a tough day...
Lisa Neu Feb 2015
I walked away today.
I needed to.
I am worth more than that.
And yet the pain runs deep.
The betrayal is still fresh.
I want to believe
the world, the church
is better than this.
My "Why" resounds
in the darkness --
hollow, alone, cold.
But I will keep asking--
     WHY?
And I will keep walking.
The new life is just ahead.
I know it.
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