I'm a matchstick
With a sulfur head
Dying out quick as I'm lit
How bright I burn
For those few seconds in
A darkened mine
How I shine
Reflections in dirty eyes
And lantern light
How I singe the fingers
Of black lung victims
Lying underground like
So many times that I've been disappointed
I'm not alone, I know
but these circumstances drown me
in the feeling
I wish, and hope for things
I cry and plead with your logical self
but you never do
I try to care about your life, and I
just want you to care
someday I hope you can
for his sake
for your sake
I just want better for us,
how did I become the enemy
Please! could you explain it to me?
I'm paranoid with good reason
and when finally you seem to acknowledge
It's never lasted
you just fall back down
without good reason
i just need to sleep on this head
full of forgotten strengths and ever-present sorrows
and hope that the stale morning will come
within the blink of an eye
like thick steam
my thoughts will dissipate into the cold, dry air
and become nothing but a homogeneous mixture
of nitrogen and oxygen
into my waiting lungs
too damaged by smoke
to know the difference between clean air
or anything else
every breath you took.
Originating from your lungs.
But yet the one thing I cherished the most
Is what made you die.
The cancer disintegrated your lungs,
the organs that I used to thank everyday.
Yet, they were the ones who took you away.
They made it harder and harder to breathe
until God told you it was time to leave.
I know you had a heart of the sun
shining and beating until the day was done.
And when you left my sight,
you left your reflection on the moon so bright
Just to let us know that you're not gone,
you're just waiting to meet us after our dawn.
My life is made of paper memories
Connected by dust motes,
Eclipsed in tiny dates,
Strung across the sky.
Burning at the edges
Because it refuses to rain.
The soaked windows
Just remind me I’m blazing,
Perpetual melodies mixing,
Strangling me with their complexity.
Only the night knows of the stars like me
Staring at the Polaroids suspended from the clouds.
Between you and I,
I haven’t really stopped gasping for fantasy.
I live lungs deep in sleeping,
Only stage one of waking up.
With eyes closed I see your shoes,
Mouth hiding behind freshly cut sunshine
Protected like a smuggled dove in your hands
All my breaths are made of
Other people’s words,
Melting into shapes
To smear into my heavens.
Holding firmly in place by my temples,
A creature of me.
One day you’ll grow human, but
For now I’ll be drifting,
Playing with sails
Like old rolling grass.
Someday you’ll see me outside this window,
Curtained by rain
I’ll be flowing between the pages,
Waving at your smoke,
Camera in hand
Hanging up our pictures.
The broken bone branches hang heavy off knuckled tree. As cold and uninviting as wrapped meat in cellophane prison cells and those sweating milk bottles left on doorsteps. Women cry with the blackbirds as day breaks, rousing their reluctant nests.
As the shadows trawl in from chicken farms and slaughterhouses, across the squalid estates and past a debt collectors party. A tramp drinks his soot like coffee and waits for another years tide to retreat. Holding pith less ambitions and unmentionable qualifications, stewardess pass, uniformed thoughts and averting faces..
The rusty playgrounds sink into the fermenting wood chips, and a plastic bag runs through the scene; only to commit suicide in the oil ribbon canal. The chemical clouds thicken into a duvet of sky whilst arrows of a natural sun run home with tears of fear on their hot faces.
Down here the street lights flicker, and the patched uniforms drape off children sick with the flu that hit the school like a plague. Herding like cattle into the classrooms, to learn about the natural world
that is most unearthly to there reason.
Lunch bells ring from factories and the sky has drained to a sick -off white. The chip shop sells butties with no sauce nor bun, which machine like men guzzle and slurp.
The car parks lay stagnant in the distance and pigeons too fat to fly lay droppings on the bronze statue of a crying hero. As the roaring stops from the factories and high visibility coats are hung, the sky bruises and the men fill the pubs, until wives with children hung on washing lines drag there sweat soaked frames to the table, only to indulge them in a row.
Night creeps in, bringing with it the hooded figures that flutter along the streets. Music plays from a vacant building and seems to brighten the night.
A silhouette is seen standing on the edge, watching the busses bellow run like migrating snails, filled with the elderly and too young.
Cigarettes infest the streets creating a carpet of ash and litter. The city survives, remaining grey, never blinking, never heard.
i went for a run today and i couldn't catch my breath
and for some reason that's been happening often now.
it's like you only get so many breaths
and maybe i just don't have that many left.
i'm writing this poem right now and i'm using the font
that reminds me of your name. it's not a pretty font,
but if you were a font, you wouldn't be pretty either.
i've been having trouble waking up in the morning.
my bedroom is too cold for me to jump out of bed.
i put socks on my feet to keep in the hear,
but when i wake up, the socks are lost in my sheets.
i get kind of nervous when i hear your name,
because this time last year, i didn't even know your name,
or who you were.
i have this weird bruise on my knee and i don't know where it came from.
it's dark purple and red and i'm worried.
i don't think i'd be able to handle losing my health,
but i kind of wonder how much i ever had it.
after june, i'll probably never see you again,
and you'll never think of me again.
i just wish you'd think of me, once.
sometimes during class i take my pulse
just to make sure it's still there.
it always is, and the i feel disgusted at myself
for wishing it wasn't.
Little lung oyster all slimy and green.
In my chest resting quietly you have been.
Peacefully sleeping in your abode.
Disturbed by my coughing and up you rode.
projectile now free ascending my throat.
And into my mouth my tongue you did coat.
With your viscouse body spread all around.
A salty Taste I now have found.
Your texture, creamy and kinda stringy.
With parts of you thick and kinda clingy.
With my teeth, I scrape you off.
And swish you around into a froth.
Through my lips I let you fall.
And suck you back up, bubbles and all.
Oh little lung oyster you're a funny little thing.
Kinda like a slimy string.
Three more times I stretch you out.
And suck back into my mouth.
I then gather you on my tongue.
"P-too-ee!" From my mouth you are flung.
You speed away out of sight.
But not so far as I thought you might.
Your stringyness catches on my front teeth.
And you make a mess on me. "Oh good grief!"
The mess is far larger than I thought.
That something your size could possibly wrought.
You cover my chin and the front of my shirt.
And drip on my shoe. Like that's gonna hurt?
I look like I was run over by a fifty pound snail.
Or splashed with snot from a two gallon pail.
So I wiped what I could off my shirt and my chin.
And swore never to play with lung oysters again.