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Jewel M C Mar 2015
Milk chocolate hair with an endless forest in her eyes;
The things that make her beautiful,
Chapped lips & an imperfect crooked-toothed smile,
The things that make her human,
Tear-stained cheeks beneath the dark circles under her eyes,
The things that make her real,
Warm days with blue skies and flying across the world,
The things she dreams about,
Remembering who she is and not knowing where she's going,
The things that make her anxious,
Dark brown eyes & little, soft brown curls,
The thing that makes her happy,
5'11 with a killer gorgeous smile,
The boy who loves all of her.
Jewel M C Oct 2014
I hardly remember
a ******* thing
about that day
before gazing into his eyes
once again, for the first time

rushing toward the exit
running from the baggage claim;
it was all a blur,
as walked through those doors
all I remember was the vastness
of the first sight,
stepping into the bright, unfamiliar place
& nothing else, but him

I scanned the crowd
the strange faces waiting
for loved ones
emotion thick enough to touch
in the air,
but just to my right
in the front
with his body pressed up against the metal bar,
I saw him

it was the first time I saw his face
not through a photo or webcam
in a time that was so long it ached
I think I lost my breath
did I leave my things behind when I ran?
I don't remember,
I just ran to him

it was too surreal
I can't remember a moment between
seeing his face, & kissing his lips
nor what kind of kiss it was
or how long it lasted
I just couldn't fathom it
I was really there
it was really him
& it didn't matter where we were
it was all a wonderland
to me, I was holding his hand again
everything was bright & new
it was magic, pure magic
Jewel M C Mar 2018
salt on the streets
like salt in the wounds
of cracked, suburban sidewalks
swelling with trampled memories
of a forgotten yesterday

imagine a world far away
from the chaos of the everyday

won’t you come outside & play?
(everything is gonna be okay)

          the world is a snow globe,
          shake it up
          & let's watch it explode

          cut me up like a paper snowflake,
          did you feel the Earth shake?
Jewel M C Mar 2018
this is a cry for help
but nobody's listening

(how
         would
                     you?
                             this silence is ear-splitting)

my patience is thinning
& it's only the beginning

can't you see that our world is spinning???

maybe it's just my head,
I'm unraveling like a loose thread
unable to avoid this looming dread
to which we're all condemned...

please, save me from myself, instead
Jewel M C Mar 2018
sometimes, there are moments
when all the world goes quiet
and, for just a moment,
I get to enjoy the silence,
a moment away from the everyday violence
of society's daily defiance

yet, it never stays quiet...

the silence is so loud, I can hear
my heartbeat
pounding in my ears
as my darkest fears
begin to come near,
& someday, they'll find me
drowning, in the salt of my tears
Jewel M C Mar 2014
It's 4:44 AM & my eyes are closed
But I'm wide awake dreaming
Of the smell of his clothes
Blanketed in the faint scent
Of him, from this afternoon
His presence lingering in my bed
From every day that we spent
Together entangled in our love for each other
Smiling between every kiss
& deeply forgetting all the world
Falling in love over & over
I lie awake tonight wishing my body was
Entangled elegantly in his
Although not tonight, someday it will be
So we must have faith in this love
You & me,
Because someday will come
& forever we will be
Jewel M C Nov 2017
< backspacebackspacebackspace

          why can't we erase

                    all the time we waste >
Jewel M C Jan 2018
fake friend / fake friend / fake friend
when the ******* will it end?
is this the new latest trend?
(just type "*******" & hit send)
         i really hope i never see you again
Jewel M C Mar 2018
Before the world forgets us, I need you to remember...

that cool afternoon in November;
the moment our eyes met,
I’d already fallen for you,
though I didn’t know it yet
our paths, they’ve nearly crossed before
only fate had something else in store
for us; you see,
you & I were meant for love,
but back then, we were just too young
to understand what it was

before they met,
our paths parted ways
so we could grow up
& learn how to stay
because fate knew our stubborn hearts
& feared we would walk away

I still remember the day we met
like it was yesterday,

& though I didn't yet know it,
fate had led you back to me
& as long as we're together
everything is gonna be okay

now I can’t seem to remember
a time you were absent from my dreams

but I keep having this fear
that our world is not what it seems,
& lately, my dreams,
                                      have been nightmares...
Jewel M C Oct 2013
life is a freefall
we're all falling
from the start
for love
for lies
for something to believe in
we fall forever
until someone catches us
but the fall doesn't stop
we just...
fall together
but sometimes
their arms get tired
they let go
we continue to fall
& they fall too
but no longer is it for one another
it's for one other
person to believe in
we aren't searching
we're falling for someone
who's worth the catch
in a split second they're there
in our arms
& in a familiar second they can be
just gone
but we don't stop falling
& our arms don't truly tire
they're always ready to catch someone new
even if we aren't
& we're always ready to wrap our arms
around a someone new
& even if we yet don't know it
life is a freefall
but the key is
to remember
we're not alone
we're all falling
a freefall
searching for something true
Jewel M C Feb 2017
Who are we?* we ask, always asking ourselves the same questions...

We are the world.
We are brothers and sisters. Sons and daughters.
We are friends, cousins, acquaintances...
We are lovers and enemies, and also, strangers.
We are anyone and everyone, all at once.
We are, despite all else, connected.

That must mean something to us. Shouldn't it?

We are 7.5 billion bodies, each alike in enough ways that might make our differences invisible. (But are they?)

We are the same, in so many ways. Enough that our similarities should outweigh our inevitable differences. Our similarities should be enough to prove that our differences are not worth fighting about. Yet, somehow, they aren't. Because we do fight. We fight without any known rhyme or reason, and without genuine purpose. Without empathy. We fight over our differences with enough audacity to claim that they should be ranked. With the belief that each of our differences should be sorted, allowing some of us to be valued as less than others, and also, some of us valued so much more. So, we fight. Like siblings or old lovers. Every single day. Probably have since the beginning of time, or, rather, when we created the concept of time. Perhaps the fighting began when we became a we. And since, the fighting has been constant. It's the only thing that really brings us together. And the one thing tearing us apart.

We find any excuse we can that will bring us closer to division rather than unity. Somehow, we are still far too concerned with the qualities that make us different rather than with those that which we share. And for so many of us, it seems easier to choose not to share. We are selfish and we rarely share. We are all in this together however we behave as though we are unaware the other exists. Mindlessly we share similar DNA but we act like we don't care. It must be easier to behave as though we are unaware. We do whatever it takes to ignore the facts that lie right before our eyes and we build walls around them. We look the other way, in any direction that might lead us into misdirection. We pretend we don't see, that we don't know, that we don't care.

We the people, of the world. We the hopeless, the reckless, the desperate... We the lost.

We are time-wasters, dream-chasers and we are all ******* fakers. We are figments of our own imaginations. We are alternate versions of ourselves living in realities of our own creation. Realities that aren't real at all, just like us. We hide beneath our fake faces and our fake words. Our fabricated worlds are all we have to show for. We live in pretty, little bubbles as an escape from our invisible reality, in an effort to shield ourselves from the dangers of the world. We're supposed to be in this together, though somehow we'd all rather be alone. We've forgotten the meaning of we, and we've doomed ourselves to eternal loneliness. We are, if nothing else at all, inherently lonely.
Jewel M C Oct 2017
someone rescue me from my own mentality
my worst nightmares have become a reality
     I'm losing my mind
     & I can't rewind
     I can't go back to: when things were fine
          /pleasepleaseplease/
               take me back in time


wake me from this h a l l u c i n a t i o n
tell me it's     only my imagination
                    
                    my thoughts, they're running wild
                              I feel just like a child


     but I can’t think straight
     there's no escape:
*take me back to a     ~ + * dreamlike state * + ~
*part of sonnet collection: Revelling in Reverie
Jewel M C Oct 2013
i still remember
march thirteenth
the day we went on
our very first date
& i still remember
the outfit i wore
on that same tuesday
you bought me ice cream
i still remember
the first time we kissed
it was a tuesday
how could i forget?
& i still remember
that march sunset
the way that you paused
then finally leaned in
i still remember
the things that you said
that rainy afternoon
on a tuesday i regret
& i still remember
how your voice cracked
when you said goodbye
& kissed me one last time
Jewel M C Apr 2018
all alone in a crowded room
claustrophobia consumes
as i'm uncomfortably surrounded
by strangers
with friendly faces,
ultimately unfamiliar
yet seemingly displaced
from this blur of insanity
they pass as our reality

          where are we?

i am searching for familiarity

                                                  in an unfamiliar place

trying to find

                              a familiar face
Jewel M C Oct 2017
I’m from a world exactly like ours
     where the days aren’t measured by hours
{ * + & sometimes I feel like I have superpowers + * }
     there, the grass is blue & the sky is green
          > but most things are backwards in-between <
               nothing is ever what it seems

     <<< I'm lost inside heavenly hyperbole
     in the clouds of my own mentality
     a one-of-a-kind, life-like reality
     floating in anti-gravity >>>

     welcome to my favorite delusion
          @ your world is nothing but c o n f u s i o n @
everything is just an illusion allusion?
     let's dream until the next revolution

                    * * * * *
     it was     all a technicolor blur,
     only     upside-down and inside-out
     a     place unlike any other,
     dream     of the world in every color
                    * * * *
*part of sonnet collection: Revelling in Reverie
(sonnet + 4 additional lines)
Jewel M C Oct 2017
why are there cameras everywhere I go?
     what are they recording?
          what are they watching?
               why are they watching us?

why are there cameras in every room?
why are they recording everything we do?
why are they watching the things I do?
& when was my debut?*
     (be careful, they're watching you too)
Jewel M C Sep 2017
(the pleasures of daily life are free
                    are you kidding? nothing is free)

the monotony of the everyday is included in your life (experience not required)
the thing is, if you want to forget the responsibilities of the daily tedium,
if you want to become numb from your reality, on most occasions there is a price to pay
          whatever you desire, there's a bad habit for that;
          alcohol, nicotine, amphetamine...
          take a chance and indulge yourself
          in your favorite inhibitor for your inhibition
          (just don't let yourself fall into submission)

                                        ∞

your face, illuminated in the firelight of the Bic
held tightly between my blistered and burned fingertips,
radiates before the flames as they reflect the fire in your eyes
igniting the deepest desires that lie beneath mine


the flickering flames fall dim
& I see nothing but the silhouette of him
outlined by the glow of dashboard light
while I wait for the moment our lips reunite

I watch him close his eyes as he takes flight

          now, inhale
   & let yourself set sail

          /\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

your eyes, they're filled with stars
so why don't you talk to me like your mind is on Mars
because the world, it's much too far
from the privacy of your car


where we sit in silence
as the clouds begin to surround
us without warning or sound
& we become enclosed
in a thick cloak
of blue smoke
swallowing us whole

          / *exhale
let the fumes feed your mind & fuel your soul
xo
Jewel M C Apr 2017
xo
time flies
while we drive
beneath blue skies
when I'm looking at you with
♥ heart eyes ♥
& I can't lie
it feels like
******** paradise
Jewel M C Oct 2014
it's 5:11am & I miss you
& truly, I hate to miss you,
4,000 miles, my love, is quite
a long way, for our love to stretch
but stretch it may, as it only grows
though, no longer do I want it to stretch,
not because I believe it will get worn,
with our love, that's not a possibility,
I wake every morning to a smile
from you, the only sunshine that matters
but, as this sun rises, ours sets
on the other side of the world
& I can't miss another sunset without you,
distance makes the heart grow fonder
true, it does, but no one speaks about
how it makes you ache,
I miss you, my love
though soon, I won't have to,
everything is going to change
& I'm ready
to start anew
on the other side of the world
to begin my life, with you
year two
Jewel M C Nov 2016
If I could be compelled to let my heart wander freely,
It would surely guide me to a vivid vision of Hartwell street.
As I make my way, stumbling, I cannot help but detour, briefly,
Unable to refuse an indulgent moment at the corner candy store;
I graciously gather in my hands all the caramels I couldn’t possibly eat.
Sugar fueling my eager spirit, I follow the road to a familiar bend,
In passing I watch the boys play hockey in the street.
Strolling along the cracked pavement, I stop before a supreme suburban château
Taking a breath before swimming in a pool of fond reflection,
I open the gate and let my lungs fill with the inescapable summer heat.
Walking down that eternal driveway, I cross the stretch of yard
Led by my heart’s desire and the bare bottoms of my feet.
Smells of barbecue blend with the sweet taste of pink watermelon
And I’m suddenly craving to chase after the glowing fireflies,
Overcome with a feeling so pure, yet so bittersweet.
If I could, even if only for a moment
Return to 5714 Hartwell street,
I know that I would, in a heartbeat.

But where that tall, brick house once stood
stands another home, much more ordinary,
with a vacancy for memories; forever incomplete.
a memoir of Buni's old house that was filled with so many wonderful childhood memories

— The End —