chest tightening
pressure building
here we go again

throat closing
panting
coughing
crying
can't breathe
why does this
always happen?

head pounding
heart racing
mind buzzing
all i did
was say your name
out loud

I've been trying to write about you for hours,
hoping the words will flow naturally,
and finally it'll all make sense.
But the hours have become days
and the words never came
so I'm just as confused as when I began.

if you ever see me again
please don't torture me
with those eyes full of curiosity
because those eyes are a
cause of my emotions

if you ever talk to me again
please don't say kind words
nor harsh words
because those words can toy
with my emotions

if you ever love me again
please don't tell me
you see,
that love is a cause of my
aching heart and repeating
brokenness

i miss you so **** much. i dont think you even understand.