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(The Dry Salvages—presumably les trois sauvages
      — is a small group of rocks, with a beacon, off the N.E.
      coast of Cape Ann, Massachusetts. Salvages is pronounced
      to rhyme with assuages. Groaner: a whistling buoy.)

I

I do not know much about gods; but I think that the river
Is a strong brown god—sullen, untamed and intractable,
Patient to some degree, at first recognised as a frontier;
Useful, untrustworthy, as a conveyor of commerce;
Then only a problem confronting the builder of bridges.
The problem once solved, the brown god is almost forgotten
By the dwellers in cities—ever, however, implacable.
Keeping his seasons and rages, destroyer, reminder
Of what men choose to forget. Unhonoured, unpropitiated
By worshippers of the machine, but waiting, watching and waiting.
His rhythm was present in the nursery bedroom,
In the rank ailanthus of the April dooryard,
In the smell of grapes on the autumn table,
And the evening circle in the winter gaslight.

The river is within us, the sea is all about us;
The sea is the land’s edge also, the granite
Into which it reaches, the beaches where it tosses
Its hints of earlier and other creation:
The starfish, the horseshoe crab, the whale’s backbone;
The pools where it offers to our curiosity
The more delicate algae and the sea anemone.
It tosses up our losses, the torn seine,
The shattered lobsterpot, the broken oar
And the gear of foreign dead men. The sea has many voices,
Many gods and many voices.
                                       The salt is on the briar rose,
The fog is in the fir trees.
                                       The sea howl
And the sea yelp, are different voices
Often together heard: the whine in the rigging,
The menace and caress of wave that breaks on water,
The distant rote in the granite teeth,
And the wailing warning from the approaching headland
Are all sea voices, and the heaving groaner
Rounded homewards, and the seagull:
And under the oppression of the silent fog
The tolling bell
Measures time not our time, rung by the unhurried
Ground swell, a time
Older than the time of chronometers, older
Than time counted by anxious worried women
Lying awake, calculating the future,
Trying to unweave, unwind, unravel
And piece together the past and the future,
Between midnight and dawn, when the past is all deception,
The future futureless, before the morning watch
When time stops and time is never ending;
And the ground swell, that is and was from the beginning,
Clangs
The bell.

II

Where is there an end of it, the soundless wailing,
The silent withering of autumn flowers
Dropping their petals and remaining motionless;
Where is there and end to the drifting wreckage,
The prayer of the bone on the beach, the unprayable
Prayer at the calamitous annunciation?

There is no end, but addition: the trailing
Consequence of further days and hours,
While emotion takes to itself the emotionless
Years of living among the breakage
Of what was believed in as the most reliable—
And therefore the fittest for renunciation.

There is the final addition, the failing
Pride or resentment at failing powers,
The unattached devotion which might pass for devotionless,
In a drifting boat with a slow leakage,
The silent listening to the undeniable
Clamour of the bell of the last annunciation.

Where is the end of them, the fishermen sailing
Into the wind’s tail, where the fog cowers?
We cannot think of a time that is oceanless
Or of an ocean not littered with wastage
Or of a future that is not liable
Like the past, to have no destination.

We have to think of them as forever bailing,
Setting and hauling, while the North East lowers
Over shallow banks unchanging and erosionless
Or drawing their money, drying sails at dockage;
Not as making a trip that will be unpayable
For a haul that will not bear examination.

There is no end of it, the voiceless wailing,
No end to the withering of withered flowers,
To the movement of pain that is painless and motionless,
To the drift of the sea and the drifting wreckage,
The bone’s prayer to Death its God. Only the hardly, barely prayable
Prayer of the one Annunciation.

It seems, as one becomes older,
That the past has another pattern, and ceases to be a mere sequence—
Or even development: the latter a partial fallacy
Encouraged by superficial notions of evolution,
Which becomes, in the popular mind, a means of disowning the past.
The moments of happiness—not the sense of well-being,
Fruition, fulfilment, security or affection,
Or even a very good dinner, but the sudden illumination—
We had the experience but missed the meaning,
And approach to the meaning restores the experience
In a different form, beyond any meaning
We can assign to happiness. I have said before
That the past experience revived in the meaning
Is not the experience of one life only
But of many generations—not forgetting
Something that is probably quite ineffable:
The backward look behind the assurance
Of recorded history, the backward half-look
Over the shoulder, towards the primitive terror.
Now, we come to discover that the moments of agony
(Whether, or not, due to misunderstanding,
Having hoped for the wrong things or dreaded the wrong things,
Is not in question) are likewise permanent
With such permanence as time has. We appreciate this better
In the agony of others, nearly experienced,
Involving ourselves, than in our own.
For our own past is covered by the currents of action,
But the torment of others remains an experience
Unqualified, unworn by subsequent attrition.
People change, and smile: but the agony abides.
Time the destroyer is time the preserver,
Like the river with its cargo of dead negroes, cows and chicken coops,
The bitter apple, and the bite in the apple.
And the ragged rock in the restless waters,
Waves wash over it, fogs conceal it;
On a halcyon day it is merely a monument,
In navigable weather it is always a seamark
To lay a course by: but in the sombre season
Or the sudden fury, is what it always was.

III

I sometimes wonder if that is what Krishna meant—
Among other things—or one way of putting the same thing:
That the future is a faded song, a Royal Rose or a lavender spray
Of wistful regret for those who are not yet here to regret,
Pressed between yellow leaves of a book that has never been opened.
And the way up is the way down, the way forward is the way back.
You cannot face it steadily, but this thing is sure,
That time is no healer: the patient is no longer here.
When the train starts, and the passengers are settled
To fruit, periodicals and business letters
(And those who saw them off have left the platform)
Their faces relax from grief into relief,
To the sleepy rhythm of a hundred hours.
Fare forward, travellers! not escaping from the past
Into different lives, or into any future;
You are not the same people who left that station
Or who will arrive at any terminus,
While the narrowing rails slide together behind you;
And on the deck of the drumming liner
Watching the furrow that widens behind you,
You shall not think ‘the past is finished’
Or ‘the future is before us’.
At nightfall, in the rigging and the aerial,
Is a voice descanting (though not to the ear,
The murmuring shell of time, and not in any language)
‘Fare forward, you who think that you are voyaging;
You are not those who saw the harbour
Receding, or those who will disembark.
Here between the hither and the farther shore
While time is withdrawn, consider the future
And the past with an equal mind.
At the moment which is not of action or inaction
You can receive this: “on whatever sphere of being
The mind of a man may be intent
At the time of death”—that is the one action
(And the time of death is every moment)
Which shall fructify in the lives of others:
And do not think of the fruit of action.
Fare forward.
                      O voyagers, O ******,
You who came to port, and you whose bodies
Will suffer the trial and judgement of the sea,
Or whatever event, this is your real destination.’
So Krishna, as when he admonished Arjuna
On the field of battle.
                                  Not fare well,
But fare forward, voyagers.

IV

Lady, whose shrine stands on the promontory,
Pray for all those who are in ships, those
Whose business has to do with fish, and
Those concerned with every lawful traffic
And those who conduct them.

Repeat a prayer also on behalf of
Women who have seen their sons or husbands
Setting forth, and not returning:
Figlia del tuo figlio,
Queen of Heaven.

Also pray for those who were in ships, and
Ended their voyage on the sand, in the sea’s lips
Or in the dark throat which will not reject them
Or wherever cannot reach them the sound of the sea bell’s
Perpetual angelus.

V

To communicate with Mars, converse with spirits,
To report the behaviour of the sea monster,
Describe the horoscope, haruspicate or scry,
Observe disease in signatures, evoke
Biography from the wrinkles of the palm
And tragedy from fingers; release omens
By sortilege, or tea leaves, riddle the inevitable
With playing cards, fiddle with pentagrams
Or barbituric acids, or dissect
The recurrent image into pre-conscious terrors—
To explore the womb, or tomb, or dreams; all these are usual
Pastimes and drugs, and features of the press:
And always will be, some of them especially
When there is distress of nations and perplexity
Whether on the shores of Asia, or in the Edgware Road.
Men’s curiosity searches past and future
And clings to that dimension. But to apprehend
The point of intersection of the timeless
With time, is an occupation for the saint—
No occupation either, but something given
And taken, in a lifetime’s death in love,
Ardour and selflessness and self-surrender.
For most of us, there is only the unattended
Moment, the moment in and out of time,
The distraction fit, lost in a shaft of sunlight,
The wild thyme unseen, or the winter lightning
Or the waterfall, or music heard so deeply
That it is not heard at all, but you are the music
While the music lasts. These are only hints and guesses,
Hints followed by guesses; and the rest
Is prayer, observance, discipline, thought and action.
The hint half guessed, the gift half understood, is Incarnation.
Here the impossible union
Of spheres of existence is actual,
Here the past and future
Are conquered, and reconciled,
Where action were otherwise movement
Of that which is only moved
And has in it no source of movement—
Driven by dæmonic, chthonic
Powers. And right action is freedom
From past and future also.
For most of us, this is the aim
Never here to be realised;
Who are only undefeated
Because we have gone on trying;
We, content at the last
If our temporal reversion nourish
(Not too far from the yew-tree)
The life of significant soil.
Brandon Barnett Jan 2014
coming apart
at edges unstitched by sharpened memories of the loss
I'm bleeding out of every seam seeing what playing relationship costs
and it seems I'm destined
to bleed until I've paid again and again for what I bought and lost

I'm coming apart
trying to remember where it's gone, why I deserve
every stranger ****** hard night and unmeant word
and why it seems I'm destine
to choke on every revelation the loneliness serves

this is what I get, these scraps and echoes
this is what I get for believing there's more than people show
this is the price of every kiss and comfort I got to know
the debt is always having to lose it while the healing eases too slow

I'm coming undone
reliving in dreams that I know the closeness of a familiar touch
remembering that I'm buried alive and the soil's weight is too much
to scratch my way out of this destiny
with my own heart hating my decisions and holding a grudge

for a gleaming moment I found myself
for one shiny moment my tears and patches relearned trust
but what's cut of the same damaged cloth will always be what it must
and a moment was just enough to make me forget the scissor's final ******

I'm falling apart at threads worn fray
reliving so many years in the regrets born every new day
and always tossing well coins to wish the hurtful questions away
why me, why them, why now, why wouldn't first love stay?
nivek Aug 2016
The unpayable debt
love does best
what is impossible for Man.
Nat Lipstadt Sep 2013
I lay with two women.

In an Economy seat,
emblematic nowadays of
the global economy,
"value" disguised as
a shrunken package size,
for which the cost thereof
can hardly be described as
economical.

my extremities are engaged in
extreme sport,
my competition,
my aisle mates,
young ladies both.

In recognition of the
early hour of our departure,
I have been awarded by them,
a singular honor,
a distinguished cross, of sorts,
pinned with a medal,
for gallantry under siege,
the medal is not of
two crisscrossed rifles,
but crisscrossed elbows,
for gallantry
upon the cross
of the middle seat.

Blanketed and hooded,
or should I say "hoodied,"
slumber comes too easily to
my young traveling cellmates,
as does the
flexibility of the body.

They seem to revel in the words,
akimbo and limbo,
upon my adjacent
body parts.

My sides, my shoulders,
my haunches and paunches,
punched, pillowed and pilloried,
summarily donated
(with a consent slip
called an airline ticket),
to scientific research:
"In Furtherance of the Study of
Sleeping on Airplanes."

My lap, however, sacrosanct,
how else could I type,
of heartfelt matters,
read on,
for you have been both
punked and pranked!

My mind freely wanders
while body is
captive and captivated,
(did I mention they were
young and attractive?)
to the manner
in which we
juggle proximity.

My darling:
You lie beside me,
a distance of
but a few inches,
but closer still,
for I am inside you,
I am yours
for your flesh,
I take,
a blood vow,
sealed with divine blessings
of mine own composition.

For the children of my children:
You are crosstown,
but I hardly know ya,
I am of your flesh, your blood,
eternal and immutable,
no poem can be allowed
to reveal what I owe you,
secret debts unpayable
till and after
death us do part.

Proximity in my tears,
proximity in my fears
for all of us,
for thoughts of you,
come regular,
with every breath.

Proximity at the cellular level,
until that day your
words first emerge,
your are of me and my issue,
mine to behold,
mine with which to dream,
mind to mind and mine.

So now there are two,
where speech is not
a viable tool.
Know that when
I no longer compose,
I will still eternal communicate
in ways, beyond belief.

You:
So many we touch, so briefly,
lose and fade from daily sight,
yet, forever, treasured,
measure for measured,
each one of you,
parcel posted upon who I am,
the tick in the tock
of my beating heart's
final prayer,
Grace after the Meal of Life.

At my funeral
please inform the rent-a-rabbi,
that I was this and that,
labels to write on post-its,
to be stuck on my gravestone
that no one will come visit,
but please someone,
tell him to say these words:

Between,
there was no between,
there was
no approximation,
no proximity,
there was no scientific instrument extant,
that could measure
the close love,
the heart and home
in which his faith resided,
for those who touched his life.
NeroameeAlucard Feb 2016
Never give me money
I won't ever spend it right
Never give me money
I'm an idiot who's wallet never is wrapped tight

Never give me money
Because I have to make that frivolous purchase
Never give me money, because no matter how much I have I'll still feel worthless

Never give me money,
Because I'll end up with unpayable debt
Never give me money
Because sadness sprouted and took root in my head

Never give me money, I can't say this enough
Never give me money, even when times hey rough
teeth are clenched together
caffeinated intoxicated little words
brought as one
into one minuscule prose.
the boy who shines bright as the sun
in your eyes;
i destroyed it, i suppose
lost into one broken "never mind"

your tongue lapses into
minute broken shapes
along the jaw that gapes
for all the love you've sought to lose

i wish that i had known in that first minute we met
the unpayable debt
that i'd owe you
and those words were taken
from a pretty song
that no one really knew

i long for the i.v. drip
to keep me barely alive
and i am so jealous, mother
that death took you

it starts as an innocent sip
grows to an open dive
to have for you another
one drink became a few
and you've wound up like your mother

repeating yourself,
losing yourself
to a substance abuse
and the words, they melt
together, you lit the broken fuse
that sent us all to hell

so pray your worst
and break for the best
we will all meet our funeral hearse
our minds will count for less.
Caroline Roche Dec 2017
Must we ask an unpayable fee?
Saying “wait” just to later decline?
It now seems that the land of the free
Is a home that the brave cannot find.

How vexatious that they storm these walls
Pleading reason and asking charity.
Oh, how dare they try escaping home
To a land we brand OPPORTUNITY.

I fear the longing of millions of souls
All brimming with fury and cause
Is more pond’rous than the marching soles
Of the soldiers defending our flaws.
Michael Parish Apr 2014
Unpayable bills
Not enouph hours
Not enouph freedom
The dreaded voice
We make
Scares are friends
Makes them worry
Were becoming some number
Over seas
Some number
In a line up
Made of unequal stamps.
Matt Jul 2015
Retirement Planning

hahah

Americans don't get
To retire
Anymore

At least people age 30 to 50

Maybe if you are older
And worked your whole life

This country is so *******
And a debt
That is unpayable

Corrupt banksters
A nation that aborts millions

America is going to be
Like a third world country

I'll be lucky just to get enough
To eat

Not to mention
Water scarcity

And the population in CA
Just keeps going up and up

And every family
Wants to have 3 kids!

The earth can't support
All these people

In the end you know
It will big just one big
**** storm

A free for all
They will be hauling
People off to FEMA camps
For mass killing

The globalists
Want a big population
Reduction in this nation

How badly do you want
To survive?

Forget about a decent job
Or a wife
Or some type of life

Just make it through
The next day
In this struggle to survive
Jaee Derbéssy Jan 2016
I wish that I had known in
That first minute we met
The unpayable debt
That I owed you.

Because you'd been abused
By the bone that refused you
And you hired me
To make up for that

Walking in that room
when you had tubes in your arms,
those singing morphine alarms
out of tune.

They had you sleeping and eating
And I didn't believe them
When they called you
A hurricane thundercloud

When I was checking vitals
I suggested a smile
You didn't talk for a while
You were freezing

You said you hated my tone
It made you feel so alone
So you told me
I had to be leaving

But something kept me standing
By that hospital bed
I should have quit but instead
I took care of you

You made me sleep all uneven
And I didn't believe them
When they told me that there
Was no saving you
The Antlers wrote this beautiful and heartfelt song.
i am forever lost
an unpayable cost
to be free from depression to much to ask
the real me I hide under the mask
my life is a painful task
can I get a fresh start
where I don't feel like I'm always apart
my life I want to depart
com on God peirce my heart
I'm stuck in a world of thorns
trapped in a traumatic storm
what do I need
a gun to my head where I will forever bleed
I can feel if I feel the need
I can bleed if I wanna bleed
look at me now
God where's your vow
I'm sorry for being me
you knew I was never meant to be
if today I die
then now is my final goodbye
even if I tried to die
and say my final goodbye
I wouldn't fly
I would just be on the road to hell where I'll be tormented and never die
so long family goodbye
Dealing with depression should I end my pain and misery
Kyle Reeves May 2020
thirteen years old was first
the words hidden in my teeth were seen
on window pane bone shattered
spelled primal utterance
KNOW
carved in disillusioned groans

foreshadowing of roads
lain ahead on tracks
strewn in leather bootstraps
a brother hears his leg snap
THAT
like screeching eagles

the reading is clearer
with age, comprehension
improves parallel to sorrow
the price of silence whispers
FREEDOM IS
woven in slow rips of pyche's shawl

the mind shouts why
don't you pay
but first my molar
splits in two, shrieking
the rot has set in
hands firmly grasps the
bottoms of boots
gravity laughs in
chorus of unpayable premiums
pulling harder tills my foot
In trenches of mud
uncovered in the earth
spells a solemn word
BOUGHT
written from fossils of my teeth
Health care is a right
Jun Lit Mar 2020
Could writing a poem
inspired by a disease
be or become a crime?
How absurd is it
to find inspiration
out of a dreaded virus?

The emperor rudely wears indecent robes
worse than the legendary one without clothes,
more distorted than a crippled plastic ware
deformed by immoral, pretentious heat.

Incoherent recitations of tongues,
chants but not the solemn Gregorian
Pretenses at smartness of the ignorant
And all worshippers continue to be blind
Defending their King as they the headless
chess pieces are pawned,
fiercely loyally they guard their golden calf,
and all protesting Moseses, the King's men
painted with the yellow mark of wrath.

This nation’s bound to decompose -
of mountains of unpaid and unpayable debts,
of liars who have made lies the accepted truth
of gospels preached that are none but rotten fruit
of thieves and shameless robbers who lead
of nation’s coffers they bleed
of blind beggars who follow
of multitudes numb with sorrow
of misfortunes often told and retold
And all our souls to the devil’s sold.

No Davids to rise and fight the Goliaths as told
The candle in this dimly lit room refuses to turn cold
The candle burns out soon, as history's last page does unfold.

— The End —