building hammocks from dimming lights
indulgence sipping cyanide
dripping through fissures made
from the lies
broken ties
internalized
a shadow ego mind till
cocktails full of chloride
pour over laughing ID
animus swindling suicide
please forgive
just let up
I'll cave in
these serotonin little souls
down measured holes
told pleasured sin is not for him
so they go
psychoanalysis
is just paralysis
tepid palsy in choices
screams shattering thin facade
neurons raptured to their god
bones and skin
left behind in ruptured mask
jades of husk
dusk escapes into the sun
leaving me just alone
no darkened sheets
retreats of mind is adjourned
I'm on the verge
can I return
please return

thirteen years old was first
the words hidden in my teeth were seen
on window pane bone shattered
spelled primal utterance
KNOW
carved in disillusioned groans

foreshadowing of roads
lain ahead on tracks
strewn in leather bootstraps
a brother hears his leg snap
THAT
like screeching eagles

the reading is clearer
with age, comprehension
improves parallel to sorrow
the price of silence whispers
FREEDOM IS
woven in slow rips of pyche's shawl

the mind shouts why
don't you pay
but first my molar
splits in two, shrieking
the rot has set in
hands firmly grasps the
bottoms of boots
gravity laughs in
chorus of unpayable premiums
pulling harder tills my foot
In trenches of mud
uncovered in the earth
spells a solemn word
BOUGHT
written from fossils of my teeth

beads of salt and sweat edge
the Cuban sandwich zest from
the tip of my tongue
flavors of my own theme song
echo in my throat

I'm merry ******* footfalls
on hot concrete snares
and the groans swinging
between my thighs take lead
singing cat whistles
along Main Street

snakes will be snakes
and tight cotton shirts
is asking for venom vial shots

don't worry though
those are my brother's loosened trousers
I'm a sweet gardener
I hold doors open
and voted for Hillary
I'm blinding reflection
standing over the hill

but don't shake my thoughts
with your pepper singed howls
cleaning you up messes my stride
dress like a lady and
monsters look for prettier things

oil stains dripping through
the elbows of my shirt
writes working man sonnets
across noir alley doorways
named Touch But Don't Tell

keep quite and use the suggestion box
and don't blame me for chromosomes
genetic randomness isn't my fault
biochemical cocktails don't drown babies
you just fill your bathtub with them

why do you need life jackets
to fill my shirts
empty your oil can and get a promotion
so you can buy your own

I'm tattered sheets stuffed
over hotel window rails
you're a frail damsel selling dreams
I won't buy, I peep keyholes
save digital copies and call the cops
stop screaming and let me save you

your fingers compress a sweaty glock
rioting my stomach
your tones too ******* loud
remember I loaded the bullets
so at least credit me the shot

beads of blood and sweat
whisper cat o' nines tails
see I'm your martyr
but only on favor street.

where is me
upon ash and dust
shall the rain collide
so tell me, who remains

drowning in faint whispering of the syntax?
bracing the brackets of the mind?
buried in dust of bone?
why the frail psyche bound to collapse?
no me is not here

humans are simple
their composition seemingly
far too elegant, a dash of this
pinch of that, presto!
that be a man there, no?

pack me up, carry me in your knapsack
it seems I'm little more than a midday picnic

I hold this door handle
I've held it for time unwound
across its way I turn left or
I turn right
in fact I do both
these truths have held future's hands in pair
and through each second's splintering gate
myself divides
I turn left and
I turn right
I hold this door handle
I've held it for time unwound

let’s blur truth behind
our forest of strings
teased by blocks, and below
they dance these real boy nows
                                                                                                              clap
                                                for the show
say
                                                 your lines
                                                                                                              sing
                                                   like me
I’m
                                                your queen
baubles like pebbles
shine my fingers please
watch the firewood gambol
**** the harvest, so languid
                                                                                                           shape
                                                   your hips
just
                                                    like me
                                                                                                                 oh
                                                 they'll swoon
just
                                                      for you
please dance for the show
marionette toy!
oh sing these strings up high
what ballet they pull
                                                                                                              take
                                                         a try
no
                                                     my turn now
                                                                                                               pull
                                                   the garrotes
you're kindling
                                                         to us

since you don't know me
here's something to help

I leave wood splinters in my hands
so I can brag about not crying
when I clench my first

manly, yes I know
because you told me

the scales slithering
through my spinal cord
tell me many things

like when you
bit my long hair
and said it was gay

I spent years dislodging your teeth
but I think I learned my lesson

build cradles from rusted nails
sew them to your skin
so you never have to leave

I forgot the next lesson though
and was caught swallowing pencil shavings

sneers rattle from the tail in my ribcage
hissing that I'm too skinny to be a boy
the jokes hard to get at first
so I l graffitied the punchline on my mirror

my heartchambers gasping for breath
is the sound they make from
draining blood for gun powder

a strong proverb really
I'm glad I learned how
to blow up ghost sailing to my head

now my shadow walks to the store for me
because
I'm still learning how to crawl on my belly