blood stained fingernails
hollow eyed
intestine pasta
with a beating heart side
you don't need it
but i need it
a swig of ipecac
to polish off your favorite shade of wine
a kick of copper and regret

but i am eating
her stomach grew smaller
she drowned a little deeper
a nasty lie beneath gritted teeth

come back darling,
dinner is served

so yeah,*
i threw up thrice yesterday
let my fingers tip the trigger
& stroke my neuroticism
i just wanted to cheat:
synchronize my gut & brain
remove the abandon that
i fear with my entire being
lest it spread like a virus

yes, i’m ashamed of
that violent emptying,
of the maniac Itch that
takes ahold of me when
i feel i have no control
over the territory between
hope & disappointment
& these dramatic emotions
that render me so **** happy

but now,
i’ve begun to realize
that i can’t erase the past
& perhaps, it’s better to just
swallow my pride & place
my worth outside of what power
i may or may not yield, for
perfection is poison & i have
no right to demand it of you
nor myself

& no, i am not fragile,
although i may  tremble...
i am strong now,
in part, having carried
all these heavy things
i've fed myself on for years
forgive you, forgive myself
& finally purge for once & all
of these habitual burdens

**for i am full without them.

You probably wonder
Why I keep telling you
How bad of a person I am
I'm just waiting for you to finally figure it out
And realize that I am poison
Of the very worst kind
And that not even ipecac can help you
When you try to regurgitate
All memories of me

In the 1970s there was a wave of soft pop that struck America
one band at the crest of that wave was The Carpenters
formed by Richard and Karen Carpenter
they were wildly successful
their song We’ve Only Just Begun is still a ubiquitous wedding song
Karen’s smooth and pure voice drew giant crowds
but despite how timeless her music is
it is equally contrasted by the briefness of her life.

Karen captivated a worldwide audience with her music
but some people just can’t be reached
indoctrinated by our superficial society
thinking every celebrity should be a supermodel
critics made snide comments about her being Richard’s chubby sister
even though she wasn’t overweight
and Richard was addicted to Quaaludes
but even more important than the public was Karen’s own mother
who worried of the public’s feelings more than her own daughter’s.

Karen felt pushed to lose weight
so she hired a nutritionist
who loaded her down with carbohydrates
which obviously made her fatter
crushing her faith in nutrition
turning her towards unhealthy methods
...which worked...at first...
but unfortunately it kept working
and she refused to change, unlike her body.

Fans who once cheered for her
now gasped when they saw her emaciated skeleton take the stage
they thought she might’ve had cancer
and were concerned about her weight
but to her it was the same crowd telling her to lose weight
now telling her to gain weight
she was done hearing it
and stuck in her ways.

Her friends were worried about her
and pleaded for her to seek help
but her mother’s profession was repression
so Karen hid her depression
while her mother told her psychiatrists were for crazy people.

Karen tried using a man to make her problems disappear
and married Tom Burris two months after meeting him in 1980
he would verbally abuse her; calling her a bag of bones
then he’d *** money off her; amounts up to $50,000 at a time
needless to say the relationship was ill fated
and they divorced in 1981.

Finally Karen’s friends convinced her to see a therapist
who brought her family into a counseling session
and urged them to tell Karen they love her
of course Richard was willing to say so, they were always really close
especially after Karen had helped him with his own addiction issues
but Karen’s mother refused
berating the therapist for using her first name; Agnes
and informing him that wasn’t how their family did things.

Karen Carpenter passed away February 4, 1982 at the age of 32
she died from ipecac poisoning
she used the substance to induce vomiting every day
and it slowly dissolved her heart.

Richard was devastated.

There’s not much I can add
I guess Karen’s story speaks for itself
it just ****** me off critics jeer with impunity and without empathy
they’re free to cajole great artists while having no value themselves
driving artists away until we’re only left with negativity
it makes me want to cut out all the demons’ razor sharp tongues
before they get a taste of another angel’s wings
but would that really protect those angels
if they’re born to demons?

It's midnight in September and above me all I can see
Is every word I could never come up with
Formed into constellations I could never articulate.
Perhaps if my mouth were as vast as the sky
I could spill out my mind without second guessing.
Even after choking down a spoonful of ipecac
I can't manage to regurgitate
The paragraphs I swallowed an hour ago.
I still haven't grasped the concept
Of translating from Emotion to English
The meaning always gets lost somewhere in between.
My stomach remains forever tied
In the bunny ear knot my brother taught me.
At five years old I didn't realize
The pain I was putting my shoelaces through.
And I still remember when my mother told me
"You've got a heart so big it'll swallow you whole"
It's taken me all of my nineteen years
To fully understand what she meant.

she looks in the mirror
trails a finger down her skin
doesn't feel her bones
ashamed of the skin that she's in
she takes a bite of the bread
succumbing to the devil
but she pours the ipecac down her throat
Mia and Ana, rolling in their revel
crying into her pillow
because she's so fat
everyone else is prettier
she's not even worth looking at
stops eating for a month
not satisfied with her body
death's knocking on her door
but hey, she's no longer stocky!
boys have been staring her down
lust filling their eyes
it's sad to see that no one else sees
this detrimental disguise
the blood trickles down her forearm
who could be more proud?
but inside she's screaming for help
screaming for help, real loud
she never got a chance to say goodbye
what a bitter taste
but she got what she wanted
and all she wanted was a dainty waist

In health class,
they presented a visual that represented
one pound of fat, and I
can't escape the image because I have
the equivalent of 32.89
yellowish blocks in my messy girl-
body; 23% of my existence is
gelatinous and imperfect.

The magazines scream
acceptance, but the models are
size 2
and I want to make myself
bleed. "Boys love curves! Honey, your figure is
perfect."
...but it isn't about boys in
high school or men on the streets with their
***** eyes and intent to corrupt. The
struggle is in how my hip-
bones sing at the prospect of
prominence even though I could find
sustenance in nothing but lettuce and
Red Bull Zero and I would still want
to swallow razor blades and
Ipecac until the basin fills
with blood and food that
smelled too powerful
to ignore and felt like sin when it
tumbled into my stomach acid.

My size eight body doesn't look like
I'm sick because I still have
full hips and everyone sees
me with something chocolate in my
hand, and girls who eat, girls with
cellulite are never
as troubled as the models whose
ribs look like bird cages that trap
their hummingbird hearts. I tell
my friends that I'm having a bad
day, which will pass, but I've been
having these "bad days" since I was
eight years old and I saw
that the thighs exposed by my
stretchy,
orange shorts were too wide
to be beautiful. I was size
0 when I was twelve, but every-
one else was still shopping in
the children's section.

They call it body dysmorphia and
talk about self-esteem because
bulimia
is an ugly word that implies
ruined enamel, blistered lips, and
hospital gowns. Real girls let calories
nestle into their bodies because
bathrooms aren't glamorous,
and no one wants to kiss
a mouth that tastes like
*****.

My therapist's office is supposed
to feel safe, but all I want to
do is shatter the mirror and
slice my body open on the
frame's teeth. The spines of the books
on her wall remind me that other
girls have blood stained bras in
their closet, and jagged cliffs in
their minds, and maybe that should
help even though they aren't here
to hold my hair back or
stroke my arm until the earth-
quakes in my head slow down enough
that I can stand.

A boy who used to love me is
pulling away as though this
is a slow dance, and I'm
trying to hold too
tightly... My was
always an adventure film, but
the fight scenes have grown
repetitive and the special effects
have weakened with
time. No one knows when the
credits will roll, and that isn't
the kind of suspense he
wants when he has a girlfriend
and a future.
I am exhausting.

Shoelaces look like nooses when I
feel this alone because
I see escape in every-
thing.
This isn't an ideation, I
just want to
sleep.

Disgusting globules of yellow
ugliness bulge under
v-necks that used to make me
feel desirable and maybe
even powerful. Now the only power
comes from hunger
pains and the dizziness
of an empty stomach.

Senior year, and my nights are
razor blades instead of
rolling papers, rivulets of
blood replacing shots of someone's
parents' whiskey. No one wants
to be friends with girls in
sweatshirts who don't know how
to eat; we're suicide
watch, even if we don't want
to die...
I stopped writing suicide
notes. I am
fine.

The doctors call it isolating
even though I know the humane
thing to do is separate parasite
and host, especially if
they loved me before I
needed salvation...
No one signs up to be a life
preserver.

have you found your next darling spithole yet?
not meaning to come off rude but
i just don't have photo albums in my home anymore
of all those weathered stacks
of glossy tourist postcards and airbrushed polaroids and half-arsed private promises that led to
quick pity ***** and more simpleminded conversations (weather? news? one plus one?)
when you ran out of coffee grounds
and breakfast was cold
and the fingernail scars being shamefully picked on were still quite scarlet
like vampire tongues
fresh off a feast, a binge, a hellfest
of a hot-lipped hunger pang
how many towns did you ravage and terrorise and theatrically swoop over with your velvet raiments
how many people fainted
at the mere sight of your anaemic cadaver-sheet skin and anabolic empty marble glare
how many ****** pitchforks punctured your abdomen and how many furious torches
burned the inside of your pelvis and how many corroded teeth did you lose chewing on
leftover bones the next night
sitting all alone in your grandiose dining hall that smells of decaying rats and halitosis
spitting out the occasional tough marrow or stray spider leg (you never really got used to that odd brackish flavour),
how much of it was
worth it to you?
you were acting on impulse
instinct
some other impressive, egregious “i” word you have yet to figure out;
i can't blame you.
blame is too weak a word for anyone with half your brain to ever understand
i can't blame myself
except sometimes in the middle of the night when my teeth refuse to unclench (pissoffpissoffpissOFF)
i understand
you're the same as everyone else (nothing wrong with that i'm wrong i'm wrong so wRoNg) but
sometimes understanding doesn't mean forgiving
[just nod] yes i understand
okay fine, you crave makeup kisses
caked-up made-up fake love fake blood
painting broken boundaries all over brocade bedsheets screaming
slipping almost begging
WARNING don't cross this line and carefully step over the crude chalk drawings
where many unfortunate deaths have occured
splintered spines and shredded vascular systems and cannibal sick sighs
you barely even toed it and you lost an entire ******* arm
past that finish line
where they unhinged their jaws like singing serpents and gorged mercilessly
until their overbloated stomachs
ballooned up and burst into confetti just in time
for the next baby shower birthday party funeral eulogy
and you might be the next
victim
will you fall for that
a g a i n ?
never ****** mind that—
because we're all about acceptance here.
we're all about holy terrors cavorting with holey beggars
we're all about your tremulous callused hands on the inside of someone's delicate insides
coil up their wrenched guts again musicman
spill your unraveling lullaby all the softly shrieking butterflies have desperately searched for a way out
and you crushed them all
just to feel iridescent powder sparkling in your stained palms at 3 a.m.
reflecting the gentle throb of the glow-in-the-dark stars and the grating television static and the godless blue in your undilated pupils
when she's lying next to you fitfully asleep
dreaming of an infinite field where the weeping azaleas never bloom (she still wonders what it meant)
ribcage left ajar just a peep
cascading umber hair and stick-insect limbs splayed all over your worn pillows
sometimes unconsciously feeling your freezing nape
and you feel nothing
at all
i hope you're happy (satisfied?)
or i hope at least, that she rinses off your fraying toothbrush after she uses it to secretly purge in your newly-cleaned toilet
if that's not too much to ask for
and you also left some day-old lemonade and reheated battery acid by the fridge door
just in case
but you missed out on buying coffee grounds again
even though there's an unhealthy smattering of pinned yellow-note reminders
right next to her faded number
and you'll be moving out next week
oh well. oh well. unwell.
my obscene picture collection is still incomplete even though it's set to display on a national gallery next week [this is your cue to clap]
but you never called back so
i hope you're happy (****—sorry—satisfied)
she's not
and please, don't forget to gargle.

A Discourse on Aerophane Eunomia  9/24/2024

The preterition of bionomically viable mackintoshes perdurable by vivat credenda whorling around catacoustic furor that attempts to array the constellation of all grievances deciphered by compassionate governance is dependent upon the following stipulations and statutes. Primarily, a catadioptric houndstooth complex bionomic superorganism demands a gradgrind dompteuse of psephology (as a stark underestimate of nasute observers primarily overlooked by swingometers) trying to zizel lurdans by vaccimulgent fracedos and forfex haecceity contingencies of nimiety with pushful forcipation at the behest of quokkas affright at amphiscian afterclaps amberjacking dontolesque heydays imperiously governed by interlucation using interfluvian omphalism unreeving humanistic altruism (a tentative renegadism) in spinescent palzogony roiling in salebrosity with bastardized semelparous progeny gorgonizing the polydipsia of pickthank tantony to nebulist algedonic overdrive backfired in mackintosh vulcanization implodent upon portfire calculated to appease a fetishized odontalgia inculcated into modish broadcloth visiogenic maquettes of cultural deformation suddenly vogue with macroscian specters the subsultus of internecine nidifugous loimic periblebsis hobbling the weighage of kerygma better suited to cloistered gnotobiology rather than noisome cultural pettifoggery spooling in chorizont celsitude.

Wedelning qwersy sell-outs corralled by websters and coquelicot contecking compital moral clochards zealous for chryselephantine clavis disproportionate on shibboleths of jarabing jalousies adscripted by jarking foothot jellygraphs jerquing caballine jiggermasts by nasute opportunism attrite on incidental crepitated gerdoying stampedes culvertaging cynomorphic mavericks too nacreous to sustain nebelwerfer mechanomorphic negentropy more predictable as bezique betising for briquets of Sarvodaya finicky to proficuous nektons secondary to lagniappes of nembutsu the catalyst behind synclastic tympanies nettlesome because of elflock forestalled by ipesand nidamental to powellisation for pyretology forever percurrent as a heterodyne trigonometric variance of bounded vacillated voltinism of opaque sastruga henpecking somniation sparvering interpunction to specular umbrage sphacelated sussultatory suretyships for jansky and pulicide in ignivomous deputization of blunt obtuse iopterous conflagration fumigating ipecac into streamlined mechanization of ironmaster wallfish irriguous because of lucrative downtrodden evanescent brehon yet catalyzed by springboking resourcefulness joggling the jamdani into jockeyed cladogenesis intransigently isallobar (resolute in protection of ****** octodonts constituting the bellwethers of aleatory oryzivorous osmol insulating preterition) by chirking global solidarity even in subboreal disagreement with other countries

An oscitation of orrery often siamang in rumchunder rhotacism in celation contingent on shenango tatamae of shagreen nimbose compurgation of dashpot shibboleths of rheotaxis redemptive in the pleoinosis juddering the volplane porbeagle with tangible costive coy popocracy at the detriment of deplorable springhare rasters of tragelaph pseudo-paragons supernal in importunate thremmatology culled from goniometers of elective grillage for tachytelic gonfaloniers to punctuate the valedictory ****** of equity in equipoise suspended as a tantieme of conserved tectospheric terrella (harvested potential energy even when embezzled by chlamydate henchmen) manufactured by testudo uncial migraineurs toiling restlessly even in macroscian umbrage for gradate suffrage a piebald moonraker sphacelation of spurriers above murengers always cognizant of indignant plight but frowning on outright cultural temulentia of ultrageous cacodoxy becoming kuru. Paroxytone recadency of bosky boschveldt pantagruelian scabilonian whangams of pilloried pigeonholes slimmerbacking complex sociodynamic catastrophes abetted by worricrow paradigms obtenebrating cryptotype exists suboptimal because it is coauthored by nyejays gribbean against swoopstake individualism emergent into syndicalized mutualism (a talisman of tegular latticework moonshot telenergy capable of subverting core machinations by singular tentation of togated terpsichorean modifications to camaraderie in a woke-spun world’s sorority—responsible for torpefying virility—troating with lucriferous might yields compromise and efficacy when wed to chilgoza rather than epicene debasements while vouchsafing ambitious masculinity) such that the turncock on insight once clogged by mute ridottos now inundates trouvailles of subtle vastations gradately hedged from interramification to slowly disperse or become vecordy for huckabuck graft guilloched in defiance by skalded vorticism tediferous in contrarian polities orchestrated by chatelaine pedigree to sustain subsidiary alms for witwanton libertines despite such ergotall kilmarge of rancid flagstench purified by secular litotes

Simultaneously, wobbly but resolute mahouts--the mainpernors of scofflaw matachins trying to catamount caudle against elitism--try to obviate cecutiency to immiserate chelonian banderols cadging chevrotain empaths to nebulize matriotism in aimless vitiation of attempted negentropy by nivial centrism only to marvel at summative nolitions all wagered in bailivated wrox galvanized by baized serpentry seahogging zarzuela gamidolatry and out of the greatest cognitive dissonance hoggasters for killcow antithesis of hopsack pragmatica walloped by hotchpot howdah foumarts’ exhortations while flysch decimates their ranks as fitchew murage defaults such that political derricks are delegated to defeat quotidian dentagra even when prominent politician degage aunceled acclaim of asterism militant in pettifoggery despite jurymasted victory over the peccadillos undermining ashplant stulms (arrect in their own malversation) mainsail of rabid contumacy rather than valorous travail resurgent in chrestomathy.  

Tirociniums for timocracy aristarching arguted aretaics against Hakenkreuz and naïve espaliers bolted to boltrope epizoic determinism for witless alamort epilation of oreillet nidifugous inculcation of physiognomancy with improper brassage deskandent in perfunctory interpunction of punitive oneirocritism of radical jolkering innitency by backstay imbrication of aloof ivory-tower nihilism among perverse academic ranks illecebrous because of ichnited analysis of stemson immunifacience of scud by scrimure abandon drooling over picamar cirriped goblin treasures. The scrobiculous backlash of scumble shiding around in cat-lady garish gaudy falsettos betrothed to the superlunary concourse cooperative with silverskin sorbefacient psaphonic acceleration centrifugal from izzat operative in cultural umlaut because of unguicule embracery abroach of illicit pipelines of tubifacient graft sustained by the bonhomie of second-take absconce actinism enveloping the virgations of woke allegiance to afterclaps of alcahest  which underscores the forefront posture intermediary to alexia is a resurgent aphthong of thoughtless consumerist ploys of plashy diatribes against apologetic kerygma swaddling apotropaic aggiornamento above fraying braying jackals of religious aporia preferring the exhilarated wharfinger hobohemia to the muntjac sublimation of all entelechy synclastic towards plurennial pleimorphy for societal phoniatrics to great fanfare and amelioration of the dirigisme by guarded abraxas pergolas so decisive they collectively are both the antecedent catalyst and consequential afterbirth to high-ticket onerous pandation.

The vulpecular zayat zoppa of downtrodden crestfallen haustellum of substandard binary hawseholes become dogcarts to sophomoric banderols specious to tanquams of tantony gaslighted by dupion to either be dipnoous in endeavor (self-consciously dishonest about oppositive support for detraque) or emphatic about declasse enfranchisement darkled by the devastating prospect that authenticity invites anathema from every cordwainer obliged to sustain humane compassion deadeyed by radioactive daws of misguided quasi-astragal autecology . Taradiddles of cruelty wagered in provocative acropathy deserve alpenstocker magnanimity because of invaluable munificence in forever keystoned enhancement of allemande noospheres revalorized into burgeoned tympany and vivid nembutsu earned on the suffrage of the aloof frogmarch hobbled by martingale aegis livid by the contumacy of pretext debaucheries invented by vulpecular Idiocracy to engender the source of the vehement neurergic aspersions ultimately the ultimatum of circular sockdolagers of laborious acequia accolent only to abscissas few others could interdigitate for eventual appeasement of cordial exoteric aspiration of demassified eunomia heartfelt to attune the escaliers of recourse to invest in prosodemic eclaircise that oystercatchers overlocked against the isovol by defeating the froward isorithms of egestuous bannock will enhance nisus and oikonisus simultaneously in a world already famished of fertility in farsighted alacrity committed to the nuclear family. Thus, we need a polyphiloprogenitive growth engine to camber and calver rejuvenated moralism and redoubled enlightenment to jurymast integral noetic virtues establishing paragons of jannock wroth in success woonerfing rectitude in meliorism that refrains from anti-Americanism rather than stultifying the whole system for the mazut of killcow wragapole samara squintifegos spuddling on antebellum travesty and premodern areneidan illiteracy the sastruga of typhonic pessimism better obrogated by reform than reiterated in vandalized scaffmasters so prepossessed by scarfskin acciptrine atrocities it forgets to marvel at our stepwise progression of wondrous cosmic dilatometry piggybacking sidereal lugsails propinquities prize in ephemeral mensuration of holobenthic time at loss with the joss of kismet zazzy in foudroyant entelechy as the clepsydra bleeds festination because of polyacoustic gezellig quesited as the ultimate wonderwork forever perplexed of and tantalized by the selfsame fate of pansophy.

With peaceful intent I extend the broadest bonhomie to repudiate miscegenated compaginations that seem surly, burlesque or menacing when in reality my words have variegated connotations that sprawl elaborate metaphors with maximum creativity sometimes overlooking subtle innuendos too brash to be authentically my asseverated intent

Misanthropic ipecac syrup stirred up in my belly
Jelly filled bow hunts
Haunted my head
****** doughnuts stopped me dead
I vomited a sonnet into tissues
Fuzzy stars seem to swish through
My larynx without time for healing.
Stealing good graces from her strawberry face
Is the only way I'm dealing

Panegoism is a pandation of mensuration in supersolid pettifoggery against the wafting wasms of wanion that is a wone for wonted license expedited by parabolasters of chabouks nakedized by nasute argali in foutered conflict between bobbinets and sarsenets in catabasis from bushwa pertinacity breamed by brayers and affrayers trying to squelch brisures from conquering stagnicolous stonks by advesperating bangtail luxuries at the forefront of stradometrical neglect because of sphacelated hauteur the sprachgefuhl of elegiac poltroons of irreflex ironless drab docimasy of orectic oppidan maximalism so unseemly it almost seems a chamade of  onyxis eyeservice berating the camarilla of habanera. The hamerkop of proper stagnation mixed with aptitude is a porlocking handsel of immoralism abaft in aberdevine abessive insouciant conformity apay to sideline internecine domestic appui clarigated against desipient deontology by feasting on odontalgia mainlining decuman deadwood as gourmet especially in cloisters of davenport besieged by the frottage incurred by adevism reformulated as rimose varietism of varsal protervity and procacious profligacy immune to vastation because of vehicles of vecordy gouging vectigals in deckled consolation of gerrymandered but gentrified newels marooning the balmorality of subterfuge to enamor killcows often pilloried as sakis into mesalliance with exlex compromise.

The meldometers that tax megacerine meconology juddering against sudd trying to elude juggins judogi of barmcloth catacoustics of cacotopia immiserated ingravescent by the caudles to steeve them sink into cecutiency reminded often of negannepaut only to provoke their obsolescence of stark cisvestism transpontine in beblubbered sentimentalism peenging about bandelets dashed by dashpots of ragmatical rhinocerial romage deprived of tropoclastic nurturance in the rookery of their heyday wases of wapentake cajoling the podlecs pysmatic in incorrigible oppression of rudenture and mugience must the pansophy tread lightly against the polyacoustic repine of scelestious wrackful recklings of gossypine boskets agape with agathism pilgarlicks abide by in jamdanis castrametated as ghastly politicide. The pother of indigence is a pushful brehon encircling quozzes of quilombo reasted in rectiserial substratose taeniacide of anonymity the tabacosis of gorgonized gonophs defiling the umjunction of sumpters of veilleuse vicariant virgations of vis viewed from twiring turtlebacks of skalding vorticism of gerenuk wunderkinds plucked from plucky endeavor itself to glissade over winterkill as gonfaloniers paroxytone as monumental pergola woolding as willowish williwaws seeking to eradicate widgeons as domett by the cloture of peremptory eloquence corraded from the codswallop of the walloping machinations of poverty straining umbracious servitude to rampicks of optimism rather than the coemption of community valor in collimation with timocracy.

The cofferdam between authoritative pragmatica of clepsydra and cirripeds of pataphysics is an antagonism of form over substance wroth with azoth because of the abb of compital nevosity of bronchos caused by scop amounted among nerkas of neutrosophy recoiling in sastrugas of obfuscation beholden to sarangousty transmuted into stulm implodent to incumbent procedure imbricates idiorhythmic if saccadic balanisms of the nutation of the noosphere around circumducted anomalies of umbels qualified by therbligs of subliminal and sublime synartesis of angstroms and the plasma of sedigitated syllepsis sublated by miniaturized coemption of variegated abscissa that provokes the steepest acclivity that any single aerobe known to formative wunderkinds pales to the aftershaft of that bonanza. In such severe akinesia of alaudine alexia only deciphered by algetic subroutines insubordinating plunged wagtail derrick into the dentagra of scientific odonterism can we field the apodysophilia, beyond the specious inveterate and stubborn aphthong of science, aplanatic and apodictic feuilleton of scollardical degus that become integral dedans that cavort like duramen in the famine and volcanic galvanization in the fallow ratheripe certainty designed by stradometrical stridulation to mirror the strahl and diminish the strake by bobstaying probands by the bezique bellecism of contrahent stupidity. In the frogmarch of bonanza contecking cachalots privy to kistvaens of cameralism and the moulin camouflet the spavined of penelopized and gorgonized paludism of mehari indagating because of stulm that the mazzebah is not the mazopathia of laystall kisswonks too scurfy in lineolated limpkins to propel the lugsails at the apogees of achievement because zabaglione is too inscrutable even to zollvereins that gouge a fortune among their zoris of eavesdropped boodle among the hawsehole of highbinder intrigue holderbats thole against hopsacks because of visibilia and vetanda delimiting the ambit of adynamia wed with barkentine prestige into an easement oxtered with overlock jacquards bewildering even the janitrices to the ulterior prerogatives enjoyed by ipecac while the ireless abessive unguligrade subitaneous folly of wagtail tregetours enthused on yawny rather than ****** youthquakes.

The stylogalmaic affairs of baragouins among lavolta and stanjant stunsail with dignified stritches capsizing swarf with baldric portfires of powellisation garnering guerdons basculing because of bathmism scranching inept trichosis with walleteer agiotage because of dommerer yare proairesis to yerk kymatology from fickle and feckless to intrepid and pervicacious that maybe draconian subterfuge anserine to probang by praxeology transfixing prisoptometry might uranoplasty in metapolitics abetted by metaplasmic tourbillons tow themselves slumberous while the alacrity of lavolta tricotees with popjoys of porcellanous tephra milked vaccimulgent in impudence volplaning vivat because of contrahent silence obeyed categorically by the dormant virgation of shambles viscid in hyperbulia. When marauding among holocryptic fringes extramundane in histrinkage harried by the haecceity of brutish bowdlerization, the gnomic futtocks of the foison griffonage dissembles eupraxia in eutrapely that rantipole ecphonesis becomes an ecdysiast of the aurochs of advesperation dwaling in soteriology because the dulia of adiaphoron is a volable virtu  foothot with katzenjammer becomes the mappemonde of macrobian cosmopolitanism flushed by hues of oligochrome by visagists insuperable in vallidom that the vagarian curiosity accidentally twires the tympany dismantling mackintoshes arrayed by the mainpernor of strict docimasy tethered to squamation such that mantissas discounting echards because of chevet becomes a fashionable marivaudage yarnwindling birls of woold despite bickerns wallfish owleries cajole into wangs of slangwhang in the washlands of vicissitude wedelning chrematistic cordwainers with the windlass of their stang recapitulated in ostentation. Couveuses balize and beaze because of bandore, the sennet of sidelighted garbology upstaged by singulted skives ictuating the idempotent because of odedible vulpecular boyaus of oblectation done because of streamlined encaustic quatenus browbeating the quatsch of teenage familisteries flagitating the suboptimal Sarvodaya even with derelict flautino cadged by laevoduction chiliombs whipstaffing impressionable gerenuks sympatric by proxemics to inhospitable wen rimose with jollyboat katabothrons of catacoustics that the websters tower over the phallocrats because of wasserman popinjay panjandrum gauleiters warraying backstays of causerie clatfart amicable to jousting subternatural pickthanks of cittosis amenable to cacophony. The truer virtuosity of weasand meets a cladogenesis of champaign ambitions versus cetacean vultures chabouking the jostle of concourse among superlunary and sublunary carracks warring for cardimelech saffrons of gentrified sagination leading to idiomology easy to iambize spaniolating with nutation to govern the hyperborean capital of catalfalques simultaneous to bluepeters because of abigail bowdlerization of sophianic nidor embodied in truth.

Macerating in an addictive lifestyle,
Low key, complacent.......
At least appear to be,
Meanwhile
proverbial metaphorical analogy
The epic  inner turmoil
A gurgling cauldron of turbid water laced with ecstacy,
tupac,poprocks
ipecac, and Deepak chopra on **** amphetamine,,,,
I'm in a padded room a straight jacket
A handful of Vaseline,
And the walls are covered with *******
This makes my feel bad
MMMMMMMMMMM-KAAaaayy!
My.. psyche........ c.r..a...c....king
½- time skrrrrrrt....
K WAIT!
Psychiatrist please.....,..
No WAIT WAIT WAIT!
That's me ........
Psychologist please.......
Ya no.......no I know I KNOW!!!!!
What is it?
????
Ok ok ok gulp............
Oh .>......,huh!.....
Ok that's better
In retrospect I suppose I could either
Exccaserbate or exfoliate and extrapolate
That these things and occurrences in which
I am not only forced to pause
But also
I'm givin cause to say........
I knew this was going to happen!!!!!
Is not clairvoyance or esp.
It's the innate ability to see I have limited control of these things
.......
Meaning I can choose whether not to cause them ,
At epicenter ,,,,,
And controll impact and reaction in the second wave,
Rarely third wave and nothing beyond to infinity
And it's after the fourth wave when
actions ,deeds,and words heard
Get filled and covered in embellishments
Picked up and slung by our enemies,
Become festering lesions on our character
For everyone but us to see.......
.......
..
Everybody's gota be so **** polite
Nobody says a **** thing........
Well not to you......
Not face to face.
No no no,,,
Not these days .....
Behind your back?
Oh they just can't wait?
Then they're all about it
Taking **** rumor mongers
Backbiting chiding frenemies
Slinging mud day and night!